Are You Even Human 57. Cobbled Together

"It truly takes you no blessings to do this? You can simply… create physical records of past events?" Blossom asks , wonder radiating off of her.

And… well, that's kind of how it works. A video isn't physical per se, and it's arguably taking a record of present events. It can't reach into the past or anything like that; it just becos a record of the past by recording the present because that's how ti works. Not counting all the videos that are CGI or otherwise entirely fake.

"Additional information requested: CGI."

Computer-Generated Imagery, often referred to via shorthand, is the art of using the systems we record and replay images and sounds with to create entirely new images and sounds, which may not have previously existed in the real world at any point in ti. It is used primarily for entertainnt, but occasionally also for malicious deception.

"Additional information requested: shorthand, systems used to record and replay, creation of that which did not previously exist, real world, malicious deception."

Oh boy. Uh… shorthand is a way of communicating the sa information using less ti or space by relying on shared knowledge that can be assud to be implied by the shorthand even in the absence of explanation. For example, calling you simply 'Blossom' instead of 'A Blossom of Wilted Chances' communicates the sa information because there is no other relevant blossom I could reasonably be referring to.

"Amusent. Thief."

…Right. Anyway, to explain the systems we use to record and display images and sounds I would need to explain all of technology, which would be ti-consuming and difficult, but suffice it to say we are capable of creating objects that take advantage of the nature of the universe to create consistent desired effects. A useful point of comparison might be how Queens take advantage of biology to create unique bodies specialized for specific purposes, except perford on non-living things.

"Concern. Confusion. Is this how your kind avoids your concept of 'slavery?'" Chaos asks. "By using dead and godless matter to emulate life? How is this better?"

Well, it's better because the 'dead and godless matter' doesn't have feelings or emotions, so moral and ethical harm cannot be inflicted upon them.

"Additional information requested: morality, ethics."

Oh my god, let's… let's do one thing at a ti, okay? It's interesting that they're confused about the concept of 'creating that which did not previously exist,' but… yeah, I think I get it. The associations in my mind that I convey with the idea are different from theirs. They understand the creation of new things, but they could tell that isn't entirely what I ant. All of this gets into so of their other questions too, though, so… I guess we'll return to this when we talk about malicious deception even though I really don't want to teach aliens about the concept of lying, it's going to be such a goddamn ss.

"Excitent!" Blossom perks up.

"Irritation," I fire back. "You'd better appreciate how many advantages I'm giving up for your sake."

"You already know that we do!"

Ugh. Yeah, I guess I do. Annoying little shit. I hate how grateful I am to her.

"Hehe!"

Anyway. We can lump the rest of this together. Firstly, my people enjoy stories about events that did not happen. We fabricate hypotheticals for fun. Thus, there is considerable utility in separating the concepts of real and false in a manner that is not simply contradiction with fact and lack of contradiction with fact. There is a difference between that which is incorrect and that which is simply an elaborate hypothetical.

"Comprehension. That is sensible," Chaos hums.

Right, yeah. But we also have a secret fourth thing. Lying. Or in terms you're more likely to understand, 'malicious deception,' or 'fabricating hypotheticals and portraying them as truths in a manner designed to create a false belief about reality in others.' Because our thod of communication possesses significant barriers between thought and word, we are capable of not communicating whatever thoughts we choose and purposefully communicating whatever thoughts we wish, in whatever manner we wish, including portraying things we wish were true as things that are actually true. This creates a perpetual layer of mistrust over every conversation, in which all parties must use various thods to determine if other parties are communicating in good faith.

"Horror!" Wanderings lants. "Your entire culture is horror!"

I an. It's not great, but it has its upsides, too. …Or perhaps more honestly, it's not great, but it's mine. It's an inescapable part of who I am. Even if I live forever, I will never not be a person who grew up in human society, under human laws and expectations, and no matter how stupid I think so of those things are, they will always affect .

"Grief/Sympathy/Excitent/Interest," the colony sends , and it's admittedly easy to figure out what parts of that sentint co mainly from Blossom.

"Well yes," Chaos agrees. "After all, both of you co from cultures of horror."

Yeah, I really don't like hearing that. I get I don't co from the best place, but my culture has fucked up so many other cultures that we at least understand unilaterally declaring other ways of life as abhorrent is, itself, intrinsically abhorrent. That way of thinking has a horrible habit of resulting in the destruction of those who do not deserve it the mont destroying them becos beneficial, which is usually imdiate.

"Concurrence! The worshippers of Failure are generally horrid, but if one assus they are all horrid then one must assu the sa of , as I once worshipped Failure," Blossom says.

"But you no longer do," Chaos points out.

"But I did. And I did not worship Possibility at the ti Possibility blessed ," Blossom says. "Therefore, it is obvious that one can worship Failure and still be worthy of Possibility's blessing. Will you judge any who are worthy of Possibility's blessing as intrinsically horrid? Answer unnecessary. You just did. Fool."

Hah. Yeah, Chaos Erupts in Indifferent Blessings kind of has the vibes of a fake intellectual, doesn't he? Ah, shit, I shouldn't have thought that.

"Additional information requested: fake intellectual. In detail, please. Amusent."

"Irritation."

"Exasperation."

…Right. Right, it's… they don't care if I think stuff like that, for whatever reason. Well, I guess that's not entirely correct. It's not like Chaos is entirely unoffended, but it's… I don't know. Interpreted as playful ribbing, even though it's my genuine opinion?

"Do you hate ?" Chaos asks rhetorically, because no, I don't. "Then what scorn do your criticisms convey? What offense should I be taking from the truth?"

Well, most people don't like having their flaws pointed out to them.

"A difference in opinion is not a flaw."

…Oh, so he's just in denial about being kind of a dumbass. I an, wait, shit—

"HA!" Blossom projects an uncontrolled burst of joy, her body wiggling with delight.

Uuugh this is so embarrassing.

"It sowhat alleviates the sting of your barbs that each ti they land, you radiate regret like a worker who bit their Queen," Chaos assures . "Unlike a particular mber of the council I have previously gotten used to."

"It is also sowhat sad," Wanderings adds. "You tornt yourself by hating your own thoughts so. They are beautiful, for all their harshness. You need not be ashad."

They're… overly judgental, though. It's not like I think Chaos Erupts in Indifferent Blessings is stupid, just… the sort of person to have more confidence in his ideas than is strictly warranted. Wanderings is kind of stupid, but… agh, damn it, I'm so sorry! This is just so much at once. Can we just go back to answering questions about human culture?

"Suggestion," The Divinity of Wonder chis in. "Shift focus of interaction. I am prepared for biological information transfer and preparation. We may begin our work to heal your beloved."

Oh, we're doing that then. No question. The rest of the colony feels my conviction imdiately, and the entire council unanimously agrees to swap my task. My Queen indicates a destination for , and I start to swim, my sinuous form cutting through the depths as I make my way to the center of our territory, where The Divinity of Wonder keeps the bulk of her wombs.

…I call them wombs, but they're really more like… biological assembly chambers? Which is kind of what a womb does, and it's definitely the part of her body where she gestates newborn aliens. But it's also the part of the body where she takes living aliens apart and puts them back together as sothing new, which to seems a lot more advanced.

I'm fairly confident that there's no way I can be permanently hard by this, but I have to admit I'm a little nervous about it. I'm no stranger to complete cellular deconstruction, but I'm usually the one controlling it all. Having soone else do it is… weird.

"It's fun!" Blossom insists, swimming in lazy barrel rolls around as I approach the center of our territory.

"I am not certain I would call it fun," Chaos says, "but it is quite painless. You will spend the majority of it unconscious."

"I probably won't," I inform him. "The loss of my brain doesn't cause to lose awareness of my domain, rember?"

"…Ah," he considers. "Well, I do not know what it will be like for you then, but I doubt it will be unpleasant. Especially with a Queen as skilled as ours."

"Can you not tell she does not fear the pain, Chaos Erupts in Indifferent Blessings?" Blossom chides. "Her thoughts touch on the continuous nature of the self and the physicality of mory. Very interesting subjects!"

"Not ones she needs to fear, though," Chaos says.

"Yes, she still struggles to listen," Blossom sighs.

It's overwhelming! I can try, here… uh… oh. I see. Interesting. There's a specific thod by which the brain's information is stored despite being completely disassembled. Which… might actually be the issue? I'm not sure it's entirely analogous to human brain structure.

"Let's find out!" The Divinity of Wonder says cheerfully.

Oh boy. Well, I guess there's nothing else we can really do. The core of The Divinity of Wonder's body is more like a knot than a true central node, all her various colors and styles of tendrils joining and mixing together in a writhing mass. But as two of them peel apart from each other, I see this as the facade it is: underneath, she has a true central body, and she's inviting inside it via an airlock of sorts. The chamber of flesh fills with seawater when it opens for , but after I step inside, it seals up behind and replaces the atmosphere with air. …Well, not air, per se, as I doubt humans could breathe it without complications, but with a mix of various gasses.

My serpentine body, designed entirely for aquatic travel, flops rather uselessly to the ground, but once all the seawater is pumped away a few other folds open to let into the womb proper, filling the area with so kind of strange embryonic slurry. It's nothing like the general composition of what you might find in an Earth animal, though. The liquid is as much a part of the Queen's body as her arms, and it flows around with purpose, carrying her will and intent. The liquid is thick and warm, more like sli than water, and it is alive. It is a sea of cells, swimming around and embracing even as they pluck at my scales, eager to rip apart protein by protein.

"Request: assu the form of your beloved, in her original state," my Queen rumbles all around .

"I am uncertain if I am capable of perfectly matching her brain," I warn her. "When bodies I create leave my domain, they lose consciousness in a manner that indicates brain failure."

"Concern. That is potentially problematic. We will need to identify the cause. Assu the form of one of our own workers, instead."

Sure, I can do that. I shift into the body of the worker I spoke with the other day. They're all genetically identical anyway.

"I am going to disassemble you now! Please do not be alard."

Sure, sounds good. I'm actually kind of interested now; the biology of this semi-womb is incredibly cool. How is this gunk still part of you?

And then she sends the information, and then I know. The cells of the reconstruction slurry send information to each other via contact-propagated electrical signals, acting as a pseudo-nervous system all on its own. 'Cells' is understating it all, really. It's more like organic nanomachines, working as a singular unit to break apart one of trillions of pieces at a ti.

"Everything is as expected so far," The Divinity of Wonder reports as I watch, enraptured by my own destruction. "You will lose the ability to communicate soon."

"Acknowledged," I confirm. This is all so cool! When the nanite-cells detach and unravel one of my cells, they don't just consu it, they keep it packaged and sorted for bulk configuration. Most of my cells are still alive after being detached this way, sustained by the slurry instead of blood flow. Of course, most of the cells will eventually need complete genetic reconfiguration, but the scope of this… it's incredible. I suppose it has to be, but still.

God, Peter would make all this out to be so fucking kinky. …Wait, shit.

"HAH! What!? Additi-nal inf-rm-tion r-qu–t-d: ki—" Blossom calls out, but fortuitously my Queen manages to deconstruct the part of my body capable of receiving signals from the network just in ti for to never have to think about whatever Blossom was about to ask ever again. Who knows what it could have been? Certainly not . I return to blissful silence.

…Surprisingly lonely silence.

It's certainly a relief in many ways. I've spent the past couple days in constant social contact with either the entire council or the entire colony, and that has been exhausting. Having my every thought perused for the elucidation or entertainnt of my fellows is a lot, but… none of the bad things I expected to happen actually, y'know, happened. It is sohow a surprise every single ti, even though it's basically constant. I feel… unmoored.

A feeling that probably isn't helped by the fact that I just lost all muscle control in what remains of my body. But that's fine; ultimately, muscles are as unnecessary to as brains. I can move with my domain as well as think with it. Slowly but surely, I'm reduced to protoplasmic goo, transford into my Queen's own reconstructor cells. A small section of them stops listening to her, becoming instead, and I leave them to idle, hoping she knows not to ss with them too much. I still need so flesh to anchor to, at the end of the day, but I do my best to remain small and unobtrusive.

Once I am nothing, I start to be remade. Or more accurately, my Queen creates a new body for , identical to the one she just disassembled, and I take the hint, moving myself inside it and taking over its brain as she builds it. There's a pause in her movents, and she takes apart again. Then, she rebuilds again, I take control, and she takes partially apart before focusing on rebuilding my communication organs. I take the hint and fix them myself. The entire process takes… I'm not entirely sure. A long ti. But it's relaxing, and once I can speak again I find my social batteries fully refreshed.

"That's good to hear, though I'm not sure I understand the analogy," The Divinity of Wonder says. "I have determined the nature of the issue. Your power modifies the brains it subsus so that they may be used to receive instructions from your domain directly. No ego exists in the brain itself because the brain has been changed to use an outside ego instead."

Oh. Oh shit, that makes perfect sense. My power has a lot of bandwidth, but it doesn't quite have 'control every individual neuron to think my thoughts for ' of bandwidth. So instead it's basically streaming my consciousness from my domain to whatever brain I'm using at the ti by setting up a receiver. But the receiver doesn't exactly play nice with a brain trying to think its own thoughts.

I wonder if it's possible for to create copies of people if I just figure out how to not add the receiver into those brains? I don't know how I'm doing it, so I'm not sure how I'd not do it, but it should be possible, right?

"Take care with such experints," The Divinity of Wonder warns. "Life should not be created lightly. One cannot be a proper Queen without the ans to take care of her colony."

…Yeah, that's fair, honestly. There's a decently popular human movent encouraging people not to have children because we'd just be bearing them into a dood world. While I can't say I like the fatalism, I've known too many foster families to truly disagree with the sentint. If you can't keep a person safe, you have no business creating them. And if you're the reason a new person would be unsafe? I have no sympathy for you whatsoever.

"Reassurance/sympathy/joy that you have reached us/joy that you are who you are/anger at your people/regret for your people/empathy for your people."

Ah. Haha. Hello again, everyone. How long has it been?

"Three surface lights," Chaos answers, which… woah. Really? I knew I was in there for a while, but it didn't feel like that long. I guess not having a body really gets dissociating.

"Three is far less than thirty," my Queen assures . "At this rate I believe we will be successful. Your beloved's original form, please, as closely as you can manage. This one should go much more quickly, though I will still take the ti to study carefully."

"Acknowledged," I confirm. "Changing now."

It's a bit… uncomfortable turning into the naked body of my girlfriend, especially given everything that happened to her. I'm in her body, but she's not? It's absurd. Unfair. It needs to be fixed imdiately.

I curl into a ball, trying not to think about the living sli flowing over Maria's body, bringing to sharp attention all the parts of her that I should most leave alone. It's… fine. Soon enough, The Divinity of Wonder will take the body apart and I won't need to worry about it. What can I focus on, what can I… oh! I know.

I inhale the living goop flowing around , Maria's body violently and forcefully attempting to object. I can't actually drown, since I can manually oxygenate myself, but I'm curious to see if the reconstructor cells can carry oxygen to human lungs the way they do alien ones. Maria's lungs don't really like it, but I can stop my body from coughing it all up just to see what happens, and… huh. Yeah. Oxygen is flowing. Well, that's a good sign. At least Maria's brain damage isn't from drowning in her Queen's womb. Very uncomfortable, but honestly that just helps keep my mind occupied on more appropriate topics.

Soon enough, The Divinity of Wonder starts taking apart, which… is actually quite painful, unlike when I was using an alien body. I'm very pain-resistant, having been splashed with acid several tis before, so I just push through it and let it happen. It's not too long before most of my body is no longer capable of feeling pain, and from there I am fully disassembled.

Then, The Divinity of Wonder begins to reassemble , though this process feels… off. There's sothing subtly wrong with how she's doing it, and for so reason I can't quite put my finger on it. It's as if the act of disassembling the materials that composed the body fundantally changed them in so way.

The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.

The body that ultimately gets reconstructed for … isn't Maria's body. It's close, and superficially similar, but it's a facsimile at best, sothing similar-looking made from completely different parts. The mont Wonder finishes, I shift back into my angelic form and tell her so.

"I am aware," she hums. "Sohow, you use divine power to create forms composed of godless matter. But I am unable to manipulate godless matter the way I do normal substance."

Huh?

"Additional information requested: godless matter," I ask.

"Gods reside in substance," Chaos explains.

"You previously ntioned to that it is possible to create spaces devoid of all substance," Blossom adds, "but to do this would also create spaces devoid of gods."

What? Are they saying gods cannot be present in a vacuum? Do superpowers not work in space!?

"…Concern. Fear," Chaos radiates.

"So you were not rely misspeaking," Blossom says, and for once even her words are tinged with horror. "These concepts you're thinking of… is there truly so much of this universe that contains simply… nothingness?"

Close to it, yeah. True nothingness is sowhat relative—even outer space has the occasional atom scattered about, but the difference in density between that and Earth's atmosphere is literally astronomical. If vacuums like that don't exist in the aliens' native universe, then… the concept of nothingness really is conceptually impossible, in their eyes. It would have to itself be a god.

…Is it a god?

"Careful, Thief of Faith. That is a blasphemy Blasphemy itself does not touch," Blossom warns, though not unkindly. She's trying to get to understand the sheer cultural weight of my current line of thought. It's not sothing I should be projecting without due cause. Though I have to say, the idea of a blasphemy too much for the literal god of Blasphemy is kind of hilarious.

"It is, isn't it?" Blossom titters. "Blasphemy has always been the most hypocritical of Possibility's children. It applies its domain to all but itself! But what else can you expect from a being utterly devoid of principle on principle? A pathetic excrent of a god with naught but festering sludge as followers."

Ah, that makes sense. Claiming the existence of the God of Nothing denies the wholeness of the pantheon Blasphemy inhabits and implies there is a god intrinsically greater than it, capable of operating where it is unable to even tread. Probably not the most pleasing thought, for a god. …Assuming the gods think anything like people, anyway, and I didn't entirely get that impression.

"Blasphemy may be, in its own way, more like its people than most gods are," Chaos says, "which could be argued to be its one virtue, though it is a virtue shared. Its very nature can only exist in the context of thinking beings. Without people, there is still Possibility. There is still Division. There is still Contradiction. But is there Blasphemy? Is there Failure? Is there Legion? No. Possibility had to create thought before it could create Blasphemy. So Blasphemy is a being of thought in a way that Possibility is not."

Right. Okay. That's so interesting theology, but let's roll back to the idea of 'godless matter.' You're basically saying that gods need matter to exist, but matter doesn't need gods. And whether or not a god is present in a given bit of matter… changes it?

"No," The Divinity of Wonder answers. "The matter of our universe IS its gods. The process of creating or recreating a body is in part an act of communion with Possibility, or another god for other Queens. Our flesh is their flesh. We are made of them. You are made… partly of them. But most of your matter is godless. I cannot compel it to move and act as I please."

Isn't most of this process biological? I can make sense of it, by and large. I guess I don't understand everything, but… I an it obviously works, so there's no reason to assu the bits I don't understand are… divine intervention? No. No, that thought process doesn't really work anymore, does it? I can't exactly be an atheist when I talk to a god every week.

Oh geez, the aliens don't even have a word for 'atheist.' I just said 'nonbeliever in all divinity,' and the imdiate reaction of the whole hive was 'so a completely insane person?' That's fantastic. Just absolutely great. My life is so completely upside-down from where it was a few months ago I can barely recognize myself.

"Are you claiming Possibility gave the power to affect forms of matter that Possibility itself has no command over?" I ask.

"I do not know," Wonder admits. "I can, at best, make inferences based on observations. I believe that, tautologically, Possibility has power over godless matter because Possibility bestowed you power over it."

"Possibility created the other gods, right?" I ask. "Does it have power over their natures?"

"It must," Wonder insists.

"It is a matter of so debate," Blossom explains. "Possibility is eager to commune with us, but difficult to understand in the vast majority of situations. Getting a straight answer out of it is difficult."

"The instructions it gave for how we could arrive safely to your world were the most clarity I've gleaned from it in years," Wonder agrees.

Wait, you got specific instructions for that? I suppose it makes… so amount of sense. The bodies of the colonies that drop to Earth mostly survive, except for the Leviathans.

"Our greatest warriors are too large to be easily reconfigured, especially in a limited ti fra," Wonder answers. "We did not have much notice or warning. The gods of our world simply inford their chosen that we would be moving. It was impossible not to follow."

"Even if we tried to stay, there would soon be nowhere to go," Chaos says. "The gods are our world. When they depart, they did not leave the empty space you claim to be possible. They simply left… a lack of space. A smaller world."

Oh, that's kind of terrifying.

"It wasn't fun!" Blossom confirms.

I imagine not. Yet again, my mind drifts away from the current topic and starts poking back at this whole 'godless matter' concept. Why? What's bugging ? I feel like I should understand this, or at least I should understand what's wrong with it. Intrinsically, the idea of an alternate universe with an entirely unique periodic table of elents dumping them into our universe and having everything turn out mostly okay is kind of absurd. The possibilities that make the most sense to are that the different types of matter either wouldn't react with each other at all—which is obviously false because the aliens have a general-purpose superacid—or they'd react like crazy with all sorts of things and create brand new molecules all over the place, which isn't happening because I'm pretty sure soone would have noticed. Not to ntion that aliens can breathe Earth air, so the matter of our universe is clearly interchangeable with the matter of their universe in so significant way.

So the question becos: is it partially interchangeable, or completely interchangeable? If it can react with our universe's matter I'd imagine it needs the sa basic structure of charged particles with proton and electron equivalents, but wouldn't any atom with eight positively charged particles in its nucleus just be oxygen, by the standards of this universe? God, maybe not, I don't really understand chemistry that well.

What I do understand is that powers seem perfectly functional on basically everything regardless of which universe they hail from, and a lot of powers do chemistry, so there obviously isn't so general inability of gods to affect 'godless matter.'

"Perhaps the issue isn't that gods cannot affect godless matter, but that the act of affecting matter causes them to cease to be godless?" Chaos posits, and… huh. That might be true? But does that an every human who has ever been affected by the abilities of a domain has had their entire bodies converted to non-godless matter? Godful matter? Alien matter.

…Is Anastasia made of alien matter? I imdiately shapeshift into her, letting The Divinity of Wonder take a bit of her apart and put it back together. Yep, it's the sa. Holy shit. I shift back into my angelic form. How have I never noticed this?

"You never before knew there was sothing to be seeking," Pathless Wanderings Gladden Futures chis in reassuringly.

Normal humans aren't like this, even if they have powers. So it's only if their bodies are transford by their powers that this happens? I don't get it. I don't get it!

"Calm yourself, new council mber," Wonder says soothingly.

"Twisting Scars Reshape Fate!" Blossom proposes again, and… yeah, I guess I do kind of like that na. "Yes! Vote for approval!"

"Agreent."

Oh my god.

"Agreent."

Wait just a—

"Are you displeased with the address?"

Well, no, but—

"Agreent. We welco you officially, Twisting Scars Reshape Fate."

Oh my god, fine. It's… a big na to live up to, but I guess I plan to do it. My scars have made who I am, and I will save my friends and family from the doom coming for them. Starting with Maria.

"On that note," Wonder says, "take the form of that small native again. That body may be the key. You would say it possesses a native brain, yes?"

Hmm? Oh! Oh right, if Anastasia is made of whatever bullshit alien matter is made of, then her body can be the template for fixing Maria's! I make the change and spend a while calmly floating through the goop as my brain gets disassembled again. It's always a bit disorienting to feel parts of my mind shut down one at a ti, but only kind of, like soone just pulled out one of my kidneys and the other has to take a mont to figure out how to take over the work for both of them.

Once my queen has completely disassembled , she tries her hand at remaking Maria a second ti. This goes much faster, and much more successfully. The not-quite-Maria recreation of her form is much truer to life, and while I can't truly judge if it will be able to fix what's wrong with her, her brain works, even with all-new materials.

"Now will be the difficult part, then," The Divinity of Wonder informs . "Assu the body of your beloved's current form, with as accurate a brain as you are able to create. When I disassemble you, recreate yourself in that form again. I will need to study several thods of deconstruction and reconstruction to determine the most likely way to reverse what the Queen of Legion did."

"Understood," I acknowledge, and we get started. Existing in Maria's new body is less awkward than using her human body, but it's significantly more unpleasant. Just the act of forming four separate brains to match her four heads causes a throbbing pain throughout my… sothing. My everything, really. Not to ntion four copies of her beautiful torso, albeit recreated with alien biology and ultimately ending not in her legs but a chaotic collection of arthropod-like limbs. Just the feel of the body is almost insultingly cobbled together.

Cobbled together. Cobbled, cobbled, cobbler. Like a shoe. This body can't wear shoes. I wonder if it could? Who would make alien shoes? Would aliens buy them? Aliens don't have an economy, but maybe they'd genocide a civilization for so shoes. Shoe, moo, stew… I could go for so beef stew right about now. Unfortunately there aren't water cows. No, wait! Manatees? I think those are endangered again. No manatee stew for Julietta. But that's not fair. I want it. I want it. I'm hungry. Everything hurts. It hurts it hurts it hurts I'm hungry I'm scared it hurts what's going on what's going on where am I!?

"Twisting Scars Reshape Fate! Listen. Listen to us. We are here."

What? What? Who's talking? What's going on? It hurts it hurts it hurts…

"You are safe. You will be okay."

That's true. That's not true. That's true. That's not true. It must be true. It can't be true. That's true. That's not true.

"Peace. Love. Safety. You will be okay."

I will be okay?

"You will be okay."

I will be okay. Okay. That's good. It hurts but I will be okay and that's good. They love . They will protect . Why aren't they protecting ? It hurts. It hurts. Liars. They're liars.

"Confusion. Realization. Concern. We cannot purposefully mislead you."

I bet that's what a liar would say. Who are you? Who am… I? Julietta. Julietta. Julietta. That's my na how did I almost forget my na!?

"Anger. I will have many recriminations to envenom this so-called Queen of Legion. She is unworthy of the title."

Monarchy is a fundantally corrupt system of governance because placing the vast majority of power into a single individual based not even on rit but instead on birth inevitably leads to mismanagent and entitlent, increasing the gap between those responsible for a nation and the majority of its citizens, preventing just rulership even if it is nominally desired by those in charge, which is itself an unlikely circumstance due to the aforentioned entitlent's propensity to skew one's concept of others.

"Literally what are you talking about."

"Do not bother her, A Blossom of Wilted Chances! Her mind is not properly functional."

It hurts! Who am I talking to? Wait, I'm not talking at all. Are you a new color? We have way too many of you, please just go away. Way, way, away way away…

"My favorite color is red."

That's so cool. Red is nice. Blood is red. I used to not like blood but I'm used to it now because my daughter won't stop stabbing herself and she's cute so red is cute now. Did you know that if you lose enough blood you die? I feel like she doesn't. I can't feel my legs.

"Don't worry about your legs. You'll be sleeping soon."

I doubt it. It hurts too much to sleep. It hurts. It hurts it hurts it hurts it… ah.

It doesn't hurt anymore. I… what the fuck just happened? Was that… running on Maria's brains? They're gone now, or at least disassembled enough that I can't think with them anymore, which is… good. That was very unpleasant. And I'm… going to have to do it a few more tis, if The Divinity of Wonder's estimations are correct. Better steel myself for that. Can't say I loved the experience of being temporarily insane.

Maria… oh god, she's been stuck this way this whole ti, hasn't she? If anything, she's probably doing far worse, judging by how she couldn't get out more than a word or two… though I suppose I have prior experience speaking the alien language that she doesn't have, despite how her brain got intentionally rewired for it.

I can't believe I've wasted so much ti here. It's been… surprisingly wonderful, I suppose, I'm really happy I got to et my colony, but my family needs out there. I remind everyone of this once I can speak again, but Wonder just assures she's working as fast as she can, but her priority is on avoiding potential mistakes. I know that's important, I know that. It just sucks. Everyone can feel my urgency, and they're doing their best. All I can do is wait around and be taken apart over and over again.

So I do. I endure it ti after ti, the mories of my own madness burning brightly inside with each return to sanity. My Queen takes apart once, twice, three tis, four tis… and then she starts to put back together. Moving from one borrowed body to the next. Creating a functioning mind from a maddened one. Preserving everything she can. Weeks go by as I do nothing but float inside her, changing and being changed. Until, finally, when my ability to speak is returned to one day, she says the words I've been waiting for.

"I'm ready," she says. "I believe I can do it. I just need you to bring her to ."

"Thank you," I tell her. "I'll go right away."

"Rejected," Chaos says imdiately.

"Rejected," Wanderings agrees.

"Rejected. You will take at LEAST a few hours of rest, Twisting Scars Reshape Fate. Preferably a day."

My Queen's proclamation brokers no argunt. I could go anyway, I suppose, but… no. She's right. I am ntally and physically exhausted. I can wait. I wonder why Blossom didn't vote, though. Where is she…?

"She is almost ready," Wonder responds.

What?

"Why do your tentacles have bonesss," Blossom whines.

What!? Wait, seriously, what's going on? Where am I… oh, I'm being inford where she is. …Are these directions to a different womb?

"My old body cannot prance about on solid surfaces with the false pull crushing it down the whole ti, can it?" Blossom says. "Silly thief. Never thinking things through."

No. No way. I never agreed to have anyone co with !

"Good news! A majority vote is possible even in your absence," Blossom says. "I suppose you can leave without , but I will follow you regardless."

Why!?

"Because it will be so fun! I look forward to eting more of your kind."

Humans are just going to scream and run away the mont they see you!

"Lantations! Are you certain? The Divinity of Wonder and I worked so hard on this body!"

The womb I'm approaching opens up, rapidly filling with seawater and thoroughly jostling the… the woman inside, the water kicking her feet out from under her and sending her awkwardly sprawling over the floor. She looks like an actual human woman, and though I can tell with my power that she's anything but—there are so terrifying hidden dangers contained beneath her skin, not to ntion fully functional amphibious lungs so she doesn't imdiately die down here—it's a remarkably accurate-looking fake. With… one major exception.

"Goodness, how are you supposed to swim with these smooth, tube-shaped limbs?"

"Your skin is translucent," I point out.

"Hmm? Oh, well yes! We worked very hard getting all these organs right! I wanted to show off. Look, look! What's this one called?"

"I… I can't really translate the nas."

"Say it out loud!"

Oh, uh… okay. I shift myself so organs that can do that.

"That's an enzy-producing organ attached to your stomach, so… I guess it's a pancreas?" I tell her.

"That is a very long na! Is your whole language like that? No wonder you hate proper communication."

Oh, goddamn it.

"Sorry, the na is just pancreas,"I correct myself. "The sound at the end there. I was saying so other stuff too."

"Excitent!" she says, flailing around helplessly in the water. "How many words are there? I'm good at morization, so I can probably learn at least ten or so."

What is happeninggggg.

"You are seriously going to need to make your skin opaque if you're coming to the surface," I insist.

"Oh, fine fine. Exasperated reiteration: how is a body like this designed for swimming?"

"It's not!"

"Haha! Your people are so terrible at everything. Excitent! Excitent! Excitent!"

"The skin, Blossom," I remind her. "I know you can make it any color you please."

"Bah! Curse your blessing. That was supposed to be a surprise. I know you have a fondness for the creature you stole it from."

And sure enough, in barely a second her internal organs are no longer on full display, though… her external organs certainly are. I'd look away for the sake of her modesty, but she doesn't have any so that would just encourage her. Her skin is so pale, now—

"Oh, would you like it darker like yours? I see, I see. I'll fix it for you."

—aaand now it's not. You're going to have to pick one and stick to it, Blossom. Humans can't change their skin color at-will and they tend to get super weird about it.

"Is it because your kind is terrible?"

In this case? Yes, it is entirely because my kind is terrible. Did you design your face by mushing together features from Maria and ? That's… really weird. But I guess Maria and Lia don't look much alike, so the end result is… fairly unique, even if the resemblance is unmistakable. Honestly, watching her chromatophores get to work dancing various colors across her body is… well. If I was in a human body right now, it would certainly be a little embarrassing for .

"You are thinking about reproduction again! I look forward to trying your people's thod; all your thoughts on the matter are always entertaining."

No! No. Absolutely not. You will not be doing that. Don't even think about it!

"You should teach the thing where your people respond to amusent with respiratory convulsions so I can do it at you! I wish to make fun of you in your native language. Oh! Right!"

She holds up both hands and flips off with both of them.

"Hehe! I did it!"

Okay, enough! This is not a pleasure cruise! This is not a vacation! We are not going to the surface to have fun! We need to infiltrate human territory and smuggle an entire Angel through multiple states to get her to the ocean! It's going to be obscenely difficult and stressful, and I cannot be dealing with you the whole ti! You're not coming!

Those thoughts finally give her pause, causing her to put down her hands, stop floating upside-down, and focus on actually getting a handle on her limbs a little better. …Though as she rights herself, she opens her mouth, swallows so seawater, and promptly spits it back out, offense and disgust radiating off of her before she refocuses on . Not promising.

"…You object on grounds of danger?" she asks.

"Even a small mistake could be fatal," I say. "If not for , then for Maria. I can't risk mistakes."

"Comprehension. Personally, I suspect that you will have no trouble reaching your beloved," Blossom says. "You are easy to hide and your motives are unknown. They will not even be looking for you. It is getting your beloved back that you will struggle with. Stealth will be very difficult."

"Exactly," I say. "And the more variables there are in the mission, the harder maintaining stealth will be."

"It would be a miracle of miracles if you maintain stealth at all," Blossom says. "Your beloved is not sane. She will quite literally not co quietly. It can be assud that you will be found out, and you will have to struggle against opposition to reach your objectives."

"All the more reason your flailing will be more of a detrint than a boon," I snap.

And then, suddenly, she's right in front of , her nose almost touching . Pain blooms in my chest where a crystal blade erging through her forearm has just run through. Shock spurring to action, I try to grab her and crush her, but then she's gone.

"You forget who I am, Thief of My Form," she says, retracting her hidden weapon back into her body, where the skin seems to seal up around the opening. "If you encounter resistance, you will be lucky to take down even a fraction of it before I do it myself."

…Right. Right. I forgot. I might have beaten her in a fight, but she wasn't giving it her all for most of it. And even then, it was close. She's got a good point. Having her as backup would actually be incredibly helpful.

"Exactly! Really, my enthusiasm for learning native culture and using it to tornt you is, at most, a side objective."

You fucking liar.

"I cannot do that!" she reminds . "But I do look forward to figuring out how."

Please no.

"Too late! We voted already! I'm ready when you are!"

"Perhaps this may have been a mistake," Chaos hums.

"Reiteration: too late!!!"

Oh my god, fine. Just… keep in mind I'm going to be pretty stressed this trip, alright? I'm not exactly going to be in the mood for shenanigans.

"For my second word I wish to be able to pronounce 'shenanigans.'"

Blossom. Please.

"…Yes, yes, alright," she concedes. "I will not distract from your primary objective. This I promise."

Thank you. Then whenever my council-mandated ti out is over, we'll go.

We'll take her ho, we'll fix her, and she'll be okay again. Maria will be okay. Even if she won't ever be completely human again. But, well… I ended up not really minding that. Hopefully she will too.

One way or another, I'll find a way to fix everything. It's just what I have to do.