"What are you doing?"
On the school road, the three of them were walking towards the ran shop. Morishita leaned her head closer, curiously watching Fuyuji, who was fiddling with his phone, head bowed.
"To make sure that video doesn't go to waste, I've decided to find an anonymous account and give her a heads up. Her wariness is way too low."
Fuyuji paused, then added a remark.
"It's not what you were thinking last ti, you know. That would be a criminal act."
Morishita turned her head away and continued her little skipping steps forward. "Suit yourself."
Seeing that Morishita had no objections, Fuyuji lowered his head again and continued his operation. Cha-Cha was probably still kicking railings right about now. At the very least, she'd have to finish venting before she'd accept his friend request.
As for whether Cha-Cha would realize that the person ssaging her was actually Fuyuji, who might know her true nature—he wasn't too worried about that.
One, Cha-Cha hadn't noticed at all just now that Fuyuji was nearby watching her.
Two, receiving a ssage right after finishing a railing-kicking session—a normal person's imdiate first reaction would be that soone had been nearby at the ti. And right now, Fuyuji was at the ran shop. Even if Cha-Cha suspected him, he could muddle his way through it.
Three, Cha-Cha was actually a little easy to fool. After their dramatic performance in the cafe last ti, Fuyuji had deeply grasped this point.
After creating a new account, Fuyuji casually picked a na, opened Kushida Kikyo's profile, and sent a friend request.
Having done all this, Fuyuji caught up with the other two's footsteps.
It was still that sa ran shop. The interior decor had no particular distinguishing features. A row of high stools was lined up before the counter, and the chef operated behind it, allowing a close-up view of the noodle-boiling and ingredient-adding process.
Taking his seat, Fuyuji felt a vibration in his pocket. Kushida had accepted his friend request.
[Everyone's Good Friend: Hello there. (Smiling, waving)]
As expected of you, Cha-Cha. The classic opening move.
[Chirp Chirp and Chirp Again: Greetings. This is the Advanced Nurturing Neighborhood Watch. We've recently received a complaint. Your railing-kicking behavior violates the Community Public Order Managent Act, generating excessive noise, severely disturbing others' rest, and endangering the physical safety of the railing. We request that you correct this behavior as soon as possible.]
The blank chat page remained silent for a long while before a ssage ca late.
[Everyone's Good Friend: Who are you?]
Completely different from the enthusiastic greeting monts ago, one could practically feel Kushida's icy interrogation through those three characters.
[Chirp Chirp and Chirp Again: Ma'am, this is the Advanced Nurturing Neighborhood Watch.]
[Everyone's Good Friend: 'Watch' your mom! Who are you?! Spit it out!]
"..."
Cha-Cha.
Sorry. I suddenly realize I still prefer the coquettish, caring you who gave fan service. Could you go back to that?
Just how did that sweet, soft girl turn into a vicious, foul-mouthed delinquent?
Thud—!
A heavy sound rang out right in front of Fuyuji. He raised his head. Under the ran chef's amiable gaze, a cloud of steaming white vapor billowed towards his face, and a pungent, spicy scent blasted straight to his brain.
As the white vapor dispersed, white noodles were seen rolling in a cauldron of molten lava. Various spicy seasonings heaved and tossed within like human figures struggling and wailing in the magma. It was a picture scroll straight out of hell!
Cold sweat instantly stread down Fuyuji. He turned his head chanically. "Are you trying to kill ?"
"As a human being, one must press forward indomitably and not fear challenges." Morishita once again spouted her twisted logic. She also shot a glance at Fuyuji's phone and muttered quietly, "Whose fault is it for staring at your phone and not ordering."
"Then why didn't you order the sa thing?"
Fuyuji pointed at Morishita's clear-broth, light chicken ran and demanded.
"Fuyuji Mikage, you should be thanking Morishita-sama for helping you order. This is the first ti anyone has ever received my service. Hurry up and say thank you!"
"Please answer my question directly!"
"...What an absolutely invincible ga-pervert. To actually make a girl try that kind of thing. Truly a cold-blooded, heartless creature."
"..." You rember you're a girl? Weren't you the one who ordered this the very first ti we ca here?
Facing Morishita and her flexible moral bottom line, Fuyuji felt he might never be able to out-argue her.
So he chose direct action!
Before any of the three had lifted their chopsticks, Fuyuji took his, lifted, entered, withdrew.
With lightning speed, he deposited a massive clump of noodles into Morishita's chicken ran, then just as swiftly snatched a clump of her ran back into his own bowl.
A maniacal grin surfaced on his face. "Morishita Ai, let's go to hell together."
Everything had happened far too suddenly. So much so that Morishita hadn't even processed it before her ran was already stained red.
She stared silently at the bright red chili oil spreading across the center of her ran.
Without the slightest hesitation, Morishita directly followed Fuyuji's example. She portioned out so of her own ran and added it to Yamamura's bowl beside her, perpetrating a brutal desecration upon Yamamura's ran.
"Yamamura Miki, let's go for a joyride to the very ends of hell together!"
"Eh?!"
In the end, the three of them, chopsticks in hand, stared together at the bright red ran before them and sank into a deathly silence.
A few minutes later.
Fuyuji silently stole a glance at the two, who had already begun their attempts. He decided to observe a while longer.
Filtered through the broth, the spice levels for Yamamura, Morishita, and himself were probably sothing like dium Spicy, Extra Spicy, and Super Hellfire Spicy Plus. He wasn't quite ready to embrace a suicidal charge just yet.
The phone on the table vibrated repeatedly. Kushida was growing increasingly impatient.
[Everyone's Good Friend: Where are you?! Get out here! Where'd you crawl off to die?!]
[Everyone's Good Friend: Unburnable trash like you, who can only hide in dark corners, you must usually be staring at my body with those disgusting rat-like eyes.]
[Everyone's Good Friend: Why don't you reach those claws out from the gutter?!]
...
Holy crap, personal attacks?
Can this be tolerated? Absolutely not!
I had hoped to interact with you as a mber of the Neighborhood Watch. What I got in return were curses.
Bring forth the keyboard!
[Chirp Chirp and Chirp Again: Lel~ So eager to know who I am? (SmugFace)]
[Everyone's Good Friend: 'Lel' your mom! Is that the funeral dirge playing as they dance on your grave?]
[Everyone's Good Friend: A cyber gutter rat like you, who wouldn't dare let out a single fart in real life, has nothing left but emojis to hide your trembling hands.]
[Chirp Chirp and Chirp Again: Getting triggered? Afraid of other people finding out your true nature?]
[Everyone's Good Friend: 'Triggered' your mom's crematorium queue number? I'm appreciating the diversity of species!]
[Chirp Chirp and Chirp Again: So this is the true face of the first-year popular beauty. Please, continue your performance.]
[Everyone's Good Friend: 'Performance'? Your entire family's group performance in their morial portrait fras must have been truly brilliant! A broke-ass who can't even afford a VPN without a free trial, you think you're qualified to seek validation from here?]
Gradually, Fuyuji began to feel sothing was off.
Holy crap, how co I'm getting obliterated the mont I show my head?
Why are her attacks coming like rapid cannon fire? Does she type that fast? I send one, she sends three?
I refuse to believe it! Again!
Refusing to accept this injustice, Fuyuji threw himself back into the fray!
Three minutes later. Fuyuji, doubting his very existence, was once again blasted out of the water.
He silently shoved his phone over to Morishita beside him. "Deploy your flexible moral bottom line. Keyboard-warrior her to death for !"
Morishita swept a glance over the chat log, then cast a pitying look at Fuyuji. "Very well. Since you plead with so earnestly..."
Another three minutes passed. Morishita, her face dark and gloomy, silently handed the phone to Yamamura. "Yamamura Miki, it's up to you now. Deal with her!"
"Eh? I don't know how. I've never scolded anyone before."
"It doesn't matter. Ignore what she's saying. She can say her piece, you just curse yours." Fuyuji offered guidance.
"Th-Then... I'll give it a try."
...
In the end, the three of them slumped against their chairs, staring blankly at the ceiling.
Yamamura: "She's so fierce."
Fuyuji: "Enviable typing speed."
Morishita: "The Advanced Nurturing Tentacle Monster."
anwhile, on the other side.
Even though the opposing side had long ceased to utter a single word, Kushida was still going off.
[Everyone's Good Friend: Where are you?! Get your dead ass out here! Is your mom dead? Is your dad dead too?!]
After a long, long ti, the other side finally squeezed out a single line.
[Chirp Chirp and Chirp Again: Off form today. On another day, I shall surely cut you down beneath my steed!]
[Everyone's Good Friend: No need for another day! I'll chop off your dog head right now!]
[Everyone's Good Friend: Co on! Don't tell you died too?!]
After another period of quiet, having confird she had won the fla war, a smile of pure, heartfelt delight blood on Kushida's face.
A sense of pleasure unlike any before surged from within her heart, rushing straight to her internal organs, making her feel as though she had been cleansed from the inside out.
Still not fully satisfied, Kushida sent one more ssage.
[Everyone's Good Friend: When is 'another day'? Na the date of your own death!]
[Everyone's Good Friend: Watchman! Get your dead ass out here!]
After waiting a long ti without a reply from the other side, Kushida sowhat reluctantly put her phone back in her pocket.
Wait!
Kushida's movents froze.
Hadn't she forgotten sothing?
Forget it!
Tilting her head and pondering for ages without recalling, the refreshed and clear-headed Kushida grabbed her small shoulder bag and skipped off in cheerful little steps, like a little bunny, to et up with her friends.
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