As the agents were swept away by the current, Kira deeply furrowed her brows. She turned to look at the expression on Alfred's face, then asked him, "Aren't you curious about who that person is?"
Alfred shook his head, saying, "I'm just an aging butler, and the grand events about to take place in this world no longer concern ."
"What did you an by what you said before?"
Kira walked over to Alfred and looked at him. After he had finished speaking, he seed sowhat fatigued.
If he were an ordinary old man, Kira might have thought he was tired, as thinking and speaking both consu much energy. But Alfred was still robust. Although no longer young, Kira had no doubt that she could not match this old butler in strength.
"Valeria, in a previous letter, you asked for my opinions on your future life plans. In my response, I neglected to ntion this, not because I didn't have any opinions, but rather, I fear that you may not want to hear them..."
Kira tilted her head, not understanding the aning of Alfred's words. She pondered for a mont, then said:
"Are you worried that I won't accept your advice? That's okay. I believe that a wise man learns from everyone. Even if so advice doesn't conform to my expectations, I'm happy to consider it as a reference and am grateful to those who provide advice..."
"This is precisely why you're able to progress so quickly. However, it may also be why you don't want to hear my advice."
Kira thought that Alfred was still worried about her not accepting his advice. She walked in front of him, looked into his eyes, and said, "Oh, Mr. Pennyworth, you really don't need to worry. I've always regarded you as my teacher and godfather..."
"...My advice is to bring your family to Arica as soon as possible, then find a new job and live a peaceful second half of your life. Don't ntion your past life's identity to anyone."
Kira's brows slowly furrowed, and the frequency of her chest rising and falling started to increase. It was clear that she was becoming sowhat angry, but she still asked patiently, "Why?"
Before Alfred could answer, Kira could no longer hold back. She said, "How could I betray my career? How could I betray my ideals? Lake Baikal is my hotown. I will surely return there."
She beca more emotional the more she spoke. Thinking about her hotown made her more sentintal, and she said with a trembling voice:
"Yes, I know, most people have a bad impression of Siberia, thinking it is a permanently frozen land..."
"But it is also a child cradled in the arms of a great mother. Lake Baikal is the pearl on her forehead, the tear at the corner of her eye. That is my hotown. I was born there, and I will surely die there."
"Calm down, Valeria. I am not denying this, which is why I said you might not like to hear my advice."
"You have to tell the reason, right? Alfred, how can you expect to accept such an absurd proposal without reason?"
Alfred sighed. He said,
"Decades ago, I was full of passion and ideals, just like you..."
"Indeed, I was intoxicated by the beautiful vision of great things coming into being, up until the mont I completed the task of delivering the list in accordance with the instructions..."
"But all that ended with one decision."
"What was that?"
"I rembered, as I ntioned before, after hiding the list, I didn't go directly back to England to find my superiors and contacts. Instead, I went to Moscow."
Kira furrowed her brows. She said, "I've been aning to ask. Going directly to Moscow is a violation of the rules, right? Even I, as a Soviet citizen, wouldn't dare to do it lightly."
"Right. But I had no choice at the ti. I knew that only the scientists in Moscow might be able to solve the mystery of the monster's egg."
"The process of obtaining the egg from the owl was extrely dangerous, and during it, we saw many things ordinary people would not see. I realized that so dark power might be threatening this world, and we needed to figure out how to stop it."
"At that ti, I felt the crisis was imminent. In comparison, the regulations weren't that important, so I found a way to get to Moscow."
"And then?"
"I was arrested... Of course, this was not unexpected, considering I violated the rules. But after that..."
Alfred sighed and then continued,
"At that ti, Philby had already returned to Moscow. He vouched for , and the Moscow side decided not to pursue my violation of the regulations."
"But when I told them everything, their first reaction wasn't about how to solve the issue of the monster egg and mysterious dark power or ensure the safety of the world's people. They interpreted this as a new weapon developed by the United States..."
"They asked for detailed paraters of this weapon, hoping to gain more exhaustive intelligence. I repeatedly stressed to them the dangers of the egg and that we had to resolve it to eliminate the risk for mankind."
"But the answer I received was a great disappointnt."
"The person in charge who communicated with told that, to ensure the newly developed weapon would not be used by Arica against them, they would send other agents to investigate the matter."
"And if that was just an uncontrollable, unexploitable monster, then it would first wreak havoc on Arica, which they would be happy to see."
Kira fell sowhat silent. These stories, spoken so casually from Alfred's mouth, stirred intense feelings of disappointnt and rage within her.
"Actually, at that ti, I convinced myself that perhaps the Soviet Union was in a precarious financial state and could not heavily invest in a vague project, or perhaps I didn't have sufficient evidence to prove the danger of that thing..."
"Or, I also thought... maybe in the end, no one has the obligation to save the whole human race."
Kira could hear Alfred's voice becoming choked up, especially when he uttered the last sentence. That aged, hoarse voice of his, carried a brittle sound as if sothing had shattered, choked her up when it reached her ears.
"But what truly disappointed was that I was assassinated on my way out of Moscow."
"At that ti, I thought it must have been Arican spies lurking in Moscow who wanted to kill . They almost succeeded; the person who carried out the assassination was very capable, landing two bullets in my calf and chest."
"I narrowly escaped death, but when I recovered and planned to investigate the matter, I found out that the attacker was not an Arican spy, but...one of my own."
Kira's eyes widened. She said, "How is it possible? Why would they..."
"Because the information I knew about the monster's egg and the dark power, once spread, could greatly shake the confidence of the military. They didn't want to spread panic..."
Alfred closed his eyes, then said,
"Once, we walked a path that would never be troubled by fear. When we desired to move forward, we would never need to circumvent the mountains; fear would make the mountains go around us."
"All of this ended the mont we began to hesitate."
"Maybe, no one in this world is obligated to save everyone. This is all a fanciful illusion. But when we give up on this illusion, we give up everything."
Kira saw the deep lines on Alfred's face trembling. She suddenly realized that the old man's age didn't seem to co from the physical deterioration, but from a sense of decay and fatigue after his spirit had once collapsed and then been rebuilt.
Kira suddenly understood. It was not Bruce that made Alfred give up his profession, but rather, after he had given up his own beliefs, Bruce beca his only spiritual sustenance.
With this in mind, Kira anxiously said, "Wait, Alfred, Benjamin previously obtained your information, which recorded your past..."
"If it's as you said, and you did not actually groom Little Wayne to beco a mber of the organization and he doesn't even know about your past, then you need to quickly destroy the records!"
"Co with , I'll show you to the room!"
Alfred looked at Kira, his eyes filled with surprise. He said, "I thought you would accuse of making up stories, or be upset at for deliberately blackening her..."
"You're not that kind of person."
Kira stopped walking, she turned around and hesitated for a mont before looking back at Alfred. She said,
"In such a difficult situation, people like you and Philby, shouldering unimaginable pressure, tried to avert a catastrophe and indeed achieved it."
"At your deathbed, you could say: 'My whole life and all my energy has been devoted to the most magnificent cause in the world - the struggle for the liberation of mankind.'"
Kira paused for a mont, then, in a trembling voice, said:
"Perhaps... not all mankind will be liberated..."
"Alfred..." Kira looked into Alfred's eyes and asked, "...but do you regret the cause you once dedicated yourself to?"
Alfred also looked into Kira's eyes. He was silent for a mont, then slowly shook his head.
Kira turned her back to him, paused for a mont, then resud walking.
Her voice echoed through the room, like a play whose curtain has fallen prematurely while the actor still struggles to finish the final line.
"I don't regret it either."
User Comments
0 comments from readers