Pain. How long since he had felt real pain? Losing limbs was too shocking to register before regeneration took over to replace it. The itching feeling followed by a brief wave of pins and needles was nothing to him.
He recalled even before he changed, pain felt different then. It was not too bad and seed to signify his growing strength.
The last ti he felt pain, real pain, was in that alley. He had left notes, and professed his feelings clearly but just like all the others, the disdain and dismissal followed.
When he was younger, he recalled his parents telling him he was too young to understand but it would make sense later. He rembered they told him about getting permission and understanding they could say no.
He had nodded but felt that was wrong. He had seen it over and over in his classmates and even in adults. One would confess and they would start dating.
Things would go well or fall apart but he had watched and incorporated their successes into a perfected approach.
He did, however, acknowledge that no one his age was truly dating.
When things beca more serious around him, he began finding his perfect mate. He had understood that he was superior to others. They were so slow and so focused on useless things that did not really matter.
He also saw the pathetic dating lives around him. Couples would be intense for a few months and then even he knew one or the other would be found cheating on their partner.
So did last a year and he noted them. Success was useful.
Still, he was frustrated by the very first step. He did everything right but the disdain and mocking laughter were all he got. He was not a fool.
He did not attempt to break up couples as he had seen so do. He was at least given 'that much' as he was told later.
Yet, despite his being superior to the other fools in his school, no one ever said yes. No one ever approached him, which would have been also acceptable.
He was not out of shape, nor was he an Adonis. He was average but that could complint well with anything in his mind.
He did not bother offending the groups yet there too, he was left out. He grew angry sotis but only with the groups he wanted to join.
He had no musical skill and his sister had clearly confird his voice would make nails on a chalkboard sound good. She had the sa issue so it was accepted.
Still, for 2 years, he had tried to figure out what he was doing wrong. His sister was just ahead of him and was in her senior year when he finally heard sothing.
'Creepy Ghost.'
It was the na he was known by. He was angry. He had good grades, he worked hard, and he had a destiny. He felt it. He was able to do whatever he desired save 1 thing.
He was never bullied openly but now that he knew what to look for, he began to collect evidence. He hid under bleachers and was able to find places to go unnoticed.
He only realized then that he could blend in to crowds without even people who knew him to notice.
It revealed that many talked about him. They joked how he was clearly repressing his true desire for his own gender. Many girls shivered before laughing whenever it was suggested she might be next if she beca single.
The worst, however, was his sister. She told them things! How he practiced his lines and wrote drafts to his letters! How he spoke about his future plans and how unrealistic they were!
Rage flared but he then smashed it down. It beca clear. Inferior beings were best left to their own failures. He would enjoy smashing their faces in his success.
However, a change occurred then. He did not know when it started but he shifted to finding the perfect mate completely. He realized he had to study his target and evaluate them before approaching them.
He began to take notes and then pictures. Nothing private, ever. He was not a criminal, but anything in public was fine with him.
In the process, he did not recall when he started following so. He was mapping it out and drawing satisfaction from things taking shape in his mind.
He would confess to them in a safe place and accept them when they said yes.
He could see it so clearly and the world would finally get on the path to his ascendence!
It never occurred to him that his once invisible aura had shifted to sothing more sinister, but he never did anything. He never cornered anyone.
Months passed and rumors reached his ears that girls were afraid of him now. They were really afraid. He was confused but he had narrowed down his list and smiled.
She was a transfer student and had spoken to him in a warm manner but he was not an idiot. She had been approached by several boys yet turned them all down.
So had been hilarious and he enjoyed their embarrassnt. He also confird she liked boys as that was a factor in the current world.
He was ready. He just had to find the perfect place.
He had staked it out and recalled how he suddenly felt warm and jumpy. It was like every sound was louder as the mont approached. She would be coming down the alley on her way ho.
He made very sure not to block the way out. He was not going to corner her, just call out from the side and stay there.
He had it all perfect!
Then they ca. The senior football team had been acting oddly lately yet they walked with her in the middle. He sighed as it was ruined. He was about to leave when a firm had grabbed him.
"You need to stop stalking Sara." He was genuinely confused. Stalking? He did not take reels of photos nor did he have a room or altar for anyone. He was about to speak when fire blood in his stomach as air was forced from his lungs.
He recalled hitting his head on sothing cold before the asphalt slamd into his vision. Red covered one eye and he looked up at the sneering face standing over him.
"What are you doing, dude?! We were just going to–" The leader back handed one of his teammates.
"You all know what he is doing? You know what he is? He is going to assault soone sooner or later. Even his sister thinks so." His mind was fuzzy but he knew made up crap when he heard it.
His sister may not have a high opinion but his door was always open hence getting caught practicing.
He wanted to deny things but he could not speak. Sothing felt wrong. It was getting harder to breath when the leg slamd into him. He felt sothing snap and it was now VERY hard to breath.
"I am calling the police!" Hope blood but then he saw it. The leader sneered as his leg cocked back and he realized what was about to happen.
Ti slowed down and his voice could only scream in his mind!
Why? Why could it never go right? Why was he going to die without doing anything?!
He never felt it but he knew he was dead.
It had been a shock to suddenly open his eyes in a jungle. He had barely registered that he was still alive when knowledge slamd into him. He felt like he was being crushed but then excitent filled him.
Cultivation! Qi! Living forever! Concept after concept flooded him. He had been right!
He was destined for greatness! No wonder he could not find his perfect mate! He had been in the wrong world!
He sneered as he thought of those pathetic mortals. They would be just dust while he still–
He froze as a final piece of knowledge slamd ho. A limit?! He was unable to go beyond a certain step!
Why?! Why was he being arbitrarily cut off?! He scoured his new knowledge and was enraged when he found out why.
It was not fair for him to live endlessly when his race existed solely to experience the world by direct interaction. They would move through the worlds and create opportunities while improving the ability of other races to grow stronger!
The Eternal Dao of Heaven and Earth did not need perfect beings living forever. All Celestials would eventually hit a limit and die to be reborn with a clean slate.
A reward if they do well!
What kind of petty, small-minded deal was that?! Why was he not reborn as a human or a demon?! An aether child would be better than his current state!
"I REFUSE! I AM ANT FOR MORE! I DIED AND CA BACK! I AM A GOD!" The seed was planted at that exact mont. Normally, that would lead to deviation and death, yet it did not.
The small possibility of a path even Heaven and Earth did not suspect at all was born.
It was that mont that the path to the Fiend race began.
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