["Hu Tao says: 'Specifically, the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor will prioritize requests from the Adventurers' Guild, and the first batch will co with a gift of one hundred specially made wooden boxes.'"]
Great, one sentence and adventurers have to die a hundred people first; otherwise, those boxes won't get used up.
If they don't get used up, that won't do. If the boxes aren't used, wouldn't the promotional offer go to waste?
["'And, and! We support on-site retrieval services! Our business covers most areas of Liyue. So dangerous regions require an additional fee, but—rest assured, it's very cheap!'"]
This actually sounds sowhat useful, but adventurers really don't want to need it.
Speaking of which, who's in charge of this retrieval service? Zhongli? If it's him…
Liyue residents say: This service actually has so appeal. Can we pay extra to have the Geo Archon carry back in a princess hold? Even as a corpse would do!
This service is probably sothing Xiao would want to buy—not to have Zhongli personally 'escort' him, but because he's unsure where he might die.
If soone could bring him back to Wangshu Inn after his death, it would be like his soul finding a ho, right?
["Hu Tao continues: 'Think about it: when you're out and about, you're bound to encounter dangers. There's a saying called "preparing for a rainy day," and that's exactly what this is about.'"]
But this isn't "preparing for a rainy day"; this is "one step to the finish line."
["Katheryne: 'Even if we need to prepare, it would be for things related to adventuring safety. Please leave.'"]
Readers note: Suddenly, soone speaking so normally makes everyone feel like it's abnormal.
She's absolutely right. Even if preparations are needed, it can't be preparing a "coffin fund," right? How is Katheryne so normal?
["Hu Tao: 'Hey, wait! W-Well, how about another discount! If ten people sign up at once, you get a 30% discount!'"]
Great, now ten people have to die at once to qualify.
At this rate, those hundred boxes might actually get used up.
["Old ng: 'Hall Master! That's enough, that's enough. If this goes on, the Millelith will co again.'"]
'Again.' To the Millelith, Hall Master Hu is also a 'regular custor.'
Hu Tao exclaims: "They won't agree even with such a high discount?"
"Could it be because there's no exquisite picture book by Little Lucian included?" Hu Tao falls into thought.
Lucian lightly taps Hu Tao with a hand chop: "Forget about my exquisite picture book; even your photo album wouldn't work."
Hu Tao pouts. Why can't the hall master experience the feeling of a 'successful sale'?
This is just because Hu Tao inherited the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. Otherwise, she'd really be suited to be a salesperson; that thick skin could at least make her a sales champion.
In the story, Hu Tao is rejected and has no choice but to return to the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor with the Traveler.
On the way back to the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, Hu Tao is still saying:
["'Whatever you're unwilling to face, it's bound to happen sooner or later.'"]
Readers fall silent. Hu Tao is right; this is indeed bound to happen. Everyone dies eventually.
But everyone is rather 'rational' and doesn't want to 'spend ahead of ti.'
["Hu Tao: 'Sigh, looks like we'll have to keep using the old thod.'"]
The old thod Hu Tao refers to is writing 'advertising slogans' and hanging them on a wooden board.
Besides the advertising slogans, the wooden board has many blank wooden plaques. After seeing the slogans, people can write their requests on the plaques.
For example, how they want to die—civil funeral or martial funeral. A civil funeral gets an obituary; a martial funeral goes straight to cremation!
This old thod got an upgrade after Lucian arrived because Lucian can draw. The wooden board beca prettier, with Lucian painting a picture of Hu Tao posing in a 'please sit' gesture.
To be honest, among all the thods Hu Tao has tried, only this one, used by generations of hall masters, is the most reliable.
No one knows how Hu Tao's advertising slogans were written, but at least after Lucian ca, they beca:
'Have you died today? If you died, co to the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor! Once in a lifeti, no second choice!'
'Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, providing your forever ho. (Hu Tao makes a heart gesture)'
Unfortunately, the effect is still poor. Lucian clearly drew Hu Tao's expression pack very cutely, so why didn't it work? This puzzles Hu Tao greatly.
Hu Tao also tried plastering advertisents all over the streets, but they were cleaned up by the Millelith.
Then she held a "Wangsheng One-Day Experience Event," but unsurprisingly, no one showed up.
Understandably, with a na like that, who would want to participate? Who knows if they'd make it back ho alive after the experience?
There's also what happened earlier—discussing with others, which Hu Tao calls "business expansion," even offering discounts like buy one get one free.
Unfortunately, none of these thods worked well. In the end, the thod used by generations of hall masters is the most effective. Perhaps this is why the ancestral law cannot be changed.
To be fair, didn't Zhongli participate in the "Wangsheng One-Day Experience Event"? Lucian even thought of a new advertising slogan:
'Don't you think the Geo Archon is cool? Want to be like him?'
'Then hurry to the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor to experience the sa Wangsheng experience as the Geo Archon!'
Of course, saying it's the sa can only an a similar process. To achieve the exact sa 'authentic material' would be a bit too costly.
In the story, Hu Tao starts reflecting, but she's not reflecting on whether her promotional behavior is problematic. Instead, she's reflecting on how she focused on giving benefits to new custors and neglected old custors.
Readers are full of question marks. Your profession has old custors?
["Hu Tao: 'If you just plainly give things away, people won't feel like they've "earned sothing."'"]
Everyone is speechless. How could anyone feel like they've earned sothing? They're about to die.
["Hu Tao continues: 'But that's the problem! If you can't convey that feeling, there won't be any repeat custors.'"]
["Old ng: 'Re… repeat custors…?'"]
Readers: Re… repeat custors?
What's that supposed to an? One burial isn't enough; they have to be revived and buried again?
Geo Archon! Quick, die again!
Speaking of repeat custors, readers think of the only possible repeat custor, Zhongli.
By the way, isn't the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor busy with things? The hall master is running around everywhere, so where's Zhongli?
The guest consultant is off slacking sowhere, the hall master herself is pondering advertising slogans, and Old ng is in charge of writing.
["Hu Tao: 'Write it like this: "Wangsheng Funeral Parlor's periodic grand sale: buy one get one free, buy two get three free, the more you buy, the more you get!"'"]
Readers take a look: Buy two, get three free—five people dead at once, a whole family wiped out.
["'Hehe, I'm very satisfied. It's much better than the old cold and chilly slogans! It'll definitely touch people's hearts!'"]
Indeed, it's not cold and chilly anymore. From now on, anyone who buys Wangsheng Funeral Parlor services will have to check their family tree three generations back, just in case they're the one being 'gifted.'
Now, everyone feels the 'fire' is about to burn right to their feet—very warm indeed.
===✧✦✧===
Character Voice Line · Zhongli: About the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor's Work
"I usually handle teaching newcors and passing down funeral rite experience, not slacking off."
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