Help! I Do Not Want to Guide a Disaster Chapter 69: Playing House (1)

Wenzhi hated this.

Ever since Xinyuan imprinted on him, everything had beco strange.

Now the Esper was talking about B-class Guides, stabilizers, energy restoration pills, and overusing guiding energy like Wenzhi was fragile enough to break apart at any second.

Wenzhi was starting to believe Xinyuan genuinely enjoyed ssing with his head.

Because that was exactly what this felt like.

And the worst part?

Wenzhi hated how much it was getting to him.

The imprint was definitely affecting him.

Still... This was peaceful.

There were no attacks, no collapsing buildings, no factions hunting them down every second of the day.

But Wenzhi wasn’t stupid enough to believe it would last forever.

He changed into fresh clothes, pulled on a cap and mask, then headed for the door.

The mont his hand touched the handle, footsteps hurried toward him.

Wenzhi turned just as Xinyuan appeared, already dressed to go out too.

"Where are you going?" Xinyuan asked imdiately.

Wenzhi snorted. "Where are you going?"

Xinyuan paused.

"We’re supposed to be laying low," Wenzhi continued. "That becos impossible the second you step outside."

Xinyuan crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back slightly. "We both need to stay hidden. You’re wanted by the CEA and the Old Blood."

Then he added more quietly, "So why don’t we just stay low ’together’ for a few weeks?"

He put obvious emphasis on together.

And annoyingly enough, Wenzhi knew he was right.

Wenzhi extended his hand toward him. "My cigarettes."

"No."

Wenzhi blinked once.

Xinyuan looked completely serious.

"They’re bad for you," he said. "You haven’t smoked in days already. Maybe you should keep going."

Wenzhi stared at him flatly.

"No. We are not doing this." He held out his hand again. "My cigarettes, Xinyuan."

"Are you still mad at ?"

Wenzhi took a step forward. "We are not talking about that."

"But I want to talk about it."

"Well, I don’t." Wenzhi’s eyes narrowed.

Xinyuan slowly reached into his pocket.

Wenzhi looked mildly surprised for a second, thinking Xinyuan was finally giving in.

But then the cigarette pack lifted out of Xinyuan’s hand on its own, floating lazily in the air between them.

Xinyuan held Wenzhi’s gaze the entire ti.

And suddenly Wenzhi understood.

This bastard was teasing him on purpose.

"I am not giving them to you," Xinyuan said calmly. "I am only showing them to you so you know that I am not giving them to you."

Wenzhi stared at him for a second before scoffing sharply.

His teeth showed as he stepped forward.

The mont their wavelengths brushed against each other, Xinyuan visibly stilled but he did not step back. Not even once.

"What are you doing, Xinyuan?" Wenzhi asked.

"I am trying to piss you off."

The honesty of the answer almost made Wenzhi laugh.

Instead, he grabbed Xinyuan by the collar and yanked him downward until their noses nearly touched.

"What do you want?"

Xinyuan swallowed hard, his ears turning red again.

"I want us to stay hidden together," he admitted quietly. "I want us to do things together. And I want you to listen to ."

"I want you to stop lying to ," Wenzhi shot back imdiately. "It makes feel stupid."

He released Xinyuan’s collar, but Xinyuan still did not move away.

He simply held Wenzhi’s gaze.

"My na is Shao Xinyuan," he began seriously. "I am twenty-four years old. I am a disaster-class Esper who is—"

Wenzhi covered his mouth with his palm. "Shut up."

Xinyuan’s eyes widened.

Then the corners crinkled with laughter.

His face reddened completely beneath Wenzhi’s hand, dimples appearing as he smiled against his palm.

Wenzhi genuinely could not believe this Esper.

Xinyuan looked completely pleased with himself.

His ears were bright red, his warm brown eyes shining as he looked at Wenzhi like he was the best thing that had ever happened to him.

Which was true.

"You are not even denying that you are hiding things from ." Wenzhi muttered, finally lowering his hand.

"You are hiding things too," Xinyuan countered.

Wenzhi walked past him.

"If we are really going to stay locked up in here until everything outside calms down," he said, glancing around the house, "then at least we already have everything we need."

"Wenzhi."

Wenzhi stopped walking.

Sothing about Xinyuan’s voice made him turn back slowly.

And Xinyuan was still standing there watching him.

"I..." Xinyuan caught the cigarette pack midair and slipped it back into his pocket.

"I did so research," he said seriously. "Apparently you can replace cigarettes with lollipops."

Wenzhi gave him a flat look. "I do not want lollipops."

He headed into the sitting room, cracking open a bag of chips from the kitchen cabinet. Xinyuan followed right on his heels.

"You crave cigarettes whenever you are emotionally stressed," Xinyuan continued. "I observed it. Besides..." He frowned. "I still do not understand how humans willingly inhale smoke."

Wenzhi grimaced. "Lollipops are not a solution."

"But you like sweet things," Xinyuan pointed out. "At the café, you ate more cake than actual food. You might have a sweet tooth."

"Cake is different from lollipops," Wenzhi argued.

"How?"

"Because cake has dignity."

Xinyuan blinked at him for a mont before unexpectedly laughing.

The sound was soft but genuine.

Wenzhi hated how nice it sounded in the quiet house.

"What are you?" Wenzhi muttered. "So rehabilitation worker?"

Xinyuan ignored the sarcasm entirely.

"But you still crave them," he insisted. "That discomfort when you cannot smoke—"

He stopped when Wenzhi turned to look at him.

"If we are going to stay hidden in this house together," Wenzhi said slowly, "then you need to learn how to stop pissing off, Shao Xinyuan."

Xinyuan smiled again, his dimples showing faintly. "Can you teach how to cook?"

The sudden change in topic caught Wenzhi off guard.

He stared at him for a second before thinking it over.

Frankly, it was either this or die of boredom. And when Wenzhi got bored, he usually wanted to stab soone. Or burn sothing down.

Or both.

"What do you want to learn?" he asked eventually.

Xinyuan reached into the chip bag Wenzhi was holding and stole a few pieces before answering with complete seriousness. "Everything."

Wenzhi watched him chew quietly. "Fine. Your lessons start at dinner."

Then he walked past him toward the kitchen.

Behind him, Xinyuan remained standing there looking absurdly pleased over sothing so small.

Wenzhi, anwhile, could not believe he was apparently about to spend the next few weeks playing house with a disaster-class Esper.

At least that was what he kept telling himself.