If Xin Yi had known that "civilizing" the Snake Tribe would involve this much sli, she might have just let Hei Yan burn the swamp.
It was Day Two of her "Hostage-Empress" residency, and she was currently standing over a massive hollowed-out stone vat, surrounded by ten very large, very confused, and very shirtless python beastn. The humid swamp air made her hair frizz into a halo of frustration, and her makeshift tunic, a wrap of soft animal hide provided by Qing Lin, was already stained with sothing she hoped was just botanical oil.
"No, no, no! Stop! You’re stirring it like you’re trying to kill it!" Xin Yi shrieked, grabbing the muscular arm of a warrior nad Mo She.
Mo She, a man who looked like he could snap a bear’s neck with his thighs, looked at her with wide, panicked eyes. He was holding a giant wooden paddle as if it were a war club. "But Little Female, the white bubbles.....they are angry. They hiss at !"
"It’s not angry, it’s reacting!" Xin Yi groaned, wiping sweat from her brow with the back of her hand. "It’s called saponification. If you don’t stir it slowly and consistently, the lye and the fats won’t emulsify. You’ll just end up with a bucket of oily poison that will lt your scales off."
The surrounding snake n recoiled, their slitted pupils shrinking to pinpricks. To a tribe that prided itself on their pristine, shimring scales, the threat of "lting" was worse than a death sentence.
"Listen to her," a cool voice drifted from the shadows of the stone pavilion.
Qing Lin was reclining on a carved wooden chair, draped in a thin, translucent silk-grass robe that left his pale, sculpted chest half-exposed. He was peeling a strange, purple fruit with a silver dagger. "She is a Goddess of Wisdom, rember? If she says the bubbles are ’reacting,’ then you will treat the bubbles with respect."
Xin Yi shot him a dry look. "A little less ’Goddess’ talk and a little more help would be great, King Noodle."
The warriors gasped at the disrespect, but Qing Lin only let out a low, lodious chuckle. He liked it when she snapped at him. It was a refreshing change from the terrified hissing he usually received from his subjects.
"Back to work!" Xin Yi barked, clapping her hands. "Mo She, keep stirring. You over there, yes, you with the tail, keep adding the crushed lavender-root. We want this to sll like a adow, not a wet reptile."
For the next three hours, Xin Yi presided over the most chaotic chemistry lab in history. One beastman tried to eat the raw tallow. Another accidentally flicked lye-water onto his foot and had to be dunked in a nearby puddle while screaming about "the burning magic." It was a cody of errors that made her miss the simple, at-headed logic of Hei Yan. At least with the Panther, if she told him to sit, he sat. These snakes were inquisitive, slippery, and constantly trying to touch her "soft, warm skin" to see if she was real.
Finally, the mixture thickened. It turned a creamy, opaque white, swirling with the purple flecks of the lavender.
"Okay... now we pour it into the wooden molds," she whispered, her heart racing.
As the first batch of "Azure Scale Soap" settled into the fras, a familiar, high-pitched sound rang in her skull.
[DING! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧]
[QUEST COMPLETE: The Great Swamp Makeover (Part 1 - Hygiene Evolution)!]
[Reward: 1000 Civilized Points!]
[Bonus: ’Snake Charr’ Progress 15%!]
[Host, you did it! You’ve successfully taught a group of cold-blooded killers how to make beauty products!]
System, shut up and give my stats, Xin Yi thought, leaning against a stone pillar as the warriors stared in awe at the hardening soap.
[Accessing Host Stats... ᕙ(`▽´)ᕗ]
[Na: Xin Yi]
[Title: Accidental Empress / Toilet Seeker]
[Charm: 85 (You’re basically catnip for Alphas!)]
[Intelligence: 92 (For knowing how to boil fat)]
[Stamina: 45 (Still a squishy human, unfortunately)]
[Inventory: 1x Tiger Claw (Ergency), 1x Knitting Needles (New!), 50x Seasoning Packets]
[LOCKED REWARD UNLOCKED!]
[Since the Host has brought ’Cleanliness’ to the Swamp, the System has expanded your ’Subspace Storage’ to 10 Cubic ters! You can now fit a small bathtub in there! (P.S. I added a complintary bottle of 2-in-1 Shampoo/Conditioner. Your hair looks like a bird’s nest, honey.)]
A bathtub? And shampoo? Xin Yi almost cried with joy. System, I take back 5% of the an things I’ve said about you.
"It is done?" Qing Lin’s voice was suddenly right at her ear. She jumped, her heart thumping against her ribs.
"It needs to cure," she said, trying to regain her composure. "But yes. Once it’s hard, you rub it on your skin with water. It takes away the dirt and the... well, the swamp-funk."
Qing Lin looked at the molds, then at his warriors. "You heard the Female. To the river. Use the ’failed’ batch from earlier to scrub. I will not have my palace slling like ’wet reptile’ any longer."
The warriors, eager to please their King and curious about the "magic bubbles," scrambled toward the riverbank. Xin Yi followed at a distance, watching from a grassy knoll as a dozen massive n splashed into the water, laughing and scrubbing their skin with the experintal lye-paste. It was a sight to behold, raw, primal power eting modern hygiene.
She sat down on a flat rock, watching the sunset turn the swamp into a sea of liquid gold. The peace was short-lived.
"You look troubled, Little Female."
Qing Lin sat beside her, his long, serpentine tail curling around the base of the rock.
"I’m just thinking," she said softly.
"About the Panther?" His eyes, a piercing shade of erald, searched her face. "He is still there, you know. Sitting on the border. He hasn’t moved since yesterday. My scouts say he looks like a statue made of shadow."
Xin Yi’s heart twinged. "He’s a big baby. He’s going to catch a cold or get bitten by sothing."
"He is an Alpha. He will be fine," Qing Lin dismissed Hei Yan with a wave of his hand. "What I don’t understand is.....why him? He is loud. He is impulsive. He slls like charcoal and fur. Why did you allow him to mark you?"
Xin Yi looked out at the river. "I didn’t exactly ’allow’ it at first. But.....he’s honest. He doesn’t have a hidden agenda. He just.....wants to be happy. And fed. Usually with a lot of at."
Qing Lin leaned closer, the scent of cool rain and crushed mint radiating from him. "Is that all it takes? Honesty and at? I can provide at. And my agendas.....well, they aren’t hidden if I tell them to you."
He reached out, his long, cool fingers tracing the line of her jaw, tilting her face toward his. His skin felt chilly, but not unpleasant.
"He is just a cat," Qing Lin whispered, his voice dropping to a low, hypnotic hum. "A snake can offer you things a panther cannot. We are patient. We are intricate. We know how to keep our treasures.....safe."
Xin Yi felt a flush creeping up her neck. Her heart gave a traitorous flutter at the Snake King’s dark intensity.
[DING! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)]
[ALERT! ALERT! ROMANTIC TENSION DETECTED!]
[Host! Look at those eyes! Look at that bone structure! Who cares about ’loyalty’ when you have a King who looks like a literal god? LEAN IN, HOST! DO IT FOR THE PLOT!]
System, shut up! I am a loyal wife! Sort of! Ten percent! Xin Yi scread internally.
[Wink wink! The System notes that your heart rate is 120 bpm! You’re not fooling anyone! Give him a sign! A flutter of the eyelashes! A coy smile! You’re basically a Goddess in this world, start acting like it!]
"I... I should go check on the soap," Xin Yi stamred, trying to pull away.
But Qing Lin didn’t let go. His thumb brushed over her lower lip, his gaze dropping to her mouth. "I think the soap can wait. You said I was ’cold,’ Xin Yi. Perhaps you should stay closer. I find your warmth.....addictive."
He smiled then, looking at her as the most valuable resource in the world.
"You have changed my people in two days more than I have in years," he murmured, his breath ghosting over her skin. "Soap. Preservation. Wisdom. A female like you......you aren’t ant to be hidden in a Panther’s abode. You are ant to be adorned. To be worshipped."
He leaned in, his nose brushing against hers. "So," he whispered. "Do I have a chance to contest that mark? Or must I steal you away properly? Because I think we both know......you like the thrill of the snake more than the comfort of the cat."
Xin Yi’s breath hitched. She looked into deep green eyes and for a second, just a second, she forgot all about bathrooms and systems.
[DING! (´⌣`ʃƪ)]
[System Note: That’s the spirit, Host! Explore the scales! Use that charm! Who knew civilizing the world would be so... spicy?]
Xin Yi gulped. "I... I think I need to sit down. More."
Qing Lin’s smile widened. "We have eight days left, Little Female. Let’s see how many more secrets I can coax out of you."
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