"King's Ga" — just hearing the na, you know it's nothing good.
It's a popular trope in School-thed plots, after all.
But…
Hikigaya glanced at his overly excited little sister, Komachi.
Damn it, if anyone dares drag Komachi into one of those plots, they're dead!
Seriously, why is this little sister always such a handful? I told her to go to bed...
"Co on, everyone draw a card. If you draw the joker, you're the King," Hayama cheerfully said as he placed the prepared cards in the center.
Everyone was now seated in a circle.
Their expressions varied — excitent, hesitation, forced smiles, and of course, four stoic Yomi disciples who looked like emotionless statues...
No matter how he looked at it, Hikigaya felt this was out of place.
Then, everyone began drawing cards.
Rachel Stanley moved first — naturally so, since she was the only eager and physically trained one in the group.
Next were the two boys and two girls from Hayama's group.
Then ca Komachi, practically rubbing her hands together in anticipation like a fool, making Hikigaya sweat in embarrassnt.
Following that were the two idiots from Ryozanpaku trying their hardest to pretend they were weaklings, and the imposing female teacher on the verge of turning thirty.
Always reminding people she's nearly thirty... how embarrassing.
Next was Yukinoshita, who, under the constant urging of the dango-loving little sister, reluctantly pinched her nose — figuratively — and hesitantly drew a card along with her.
Then Hikigaya and the three stoic-faced disciples quickly finished their draw.
"I got it!" Komachi cheered, "I'm the King first!"
Hikigaya covered his face. How could his little sister be such a ridiculous idiot?
Please don't shout like that — it's so embarrassing...
"Hehehe…" The only middle schooler present let out a creepy uncle-like laugh, giving everyone chills — whether they were excited or not. "Let think about what I want to do... Ah! I know!"
Her face clearly saying "I'm going to abuse my power," the dumb little sister turned to the Seventh Demon Lord (aka her brother) and asked, "Onii-chan, what card did you draw? Tell !"
As if I'd tell you!
Hikigaya gave a fake smile and turned away.
"Stingy!"
Komachi muttered and lazily declared:
"Then… A will perform for everyone."
Hey hey, don't make your laziness so obvious…
Not only was Hikigaya speechless, but everyone else gave wry smiles — except for the four Yomi disciples, who, it seed, had forgotten to bring facial expressions today.
"Who's A?" soone asked.
"That's ," Shirahama Kenichi said helplessly, raising his hand.
This guy clearly wasn't much of a perforr. After struggling for a while under everyone's expectant gaze, he finally said cautiously, "Um, I'll demonstrate so martial arts?"
Then he stood up and carefully perford a set of movents.
It was karate.
After he finished, Hayama and the others clapped enthusiastically.
"Kenichi, you're amazing," Hayama praised. "This must be close to a main fighter's level. Why didn't you join the karate club?"
The others chid in with complints as well.
Of course, it wasn't because they understood martial arts — complints are free, after all. And since a classmate had perford, it only made sense to give so encouragent.
"Hahaha, no, it's just because I'm so bad, I got kicked out," Kenichi said, clearly enjoying the praise.
While saying this, he stole a glance at Furinji Miu, who gave him a sweet, supportive smile, fully understanding the situation.
He was so happy, you could slap wings on him and he'd probably fly away.
"So this is the opponent I must face... What a disgrace," Tirawit Kokin muttered in a very low voice.
The regular people, still clapping and praising, didn't hear him — but Hikigaya and the others caught it loud and clear.
Then, the second round began.
This ti, the King was Tobe.
Hikigaya had noticed this guy stealing glances at the girl with glasses since earlier.
Ah that's right he's got a crush!
Though... the likelihood that it's still one-sided even here is extrely high.
Looks like Hikigaya's judgnt was right. This guy's absolutely in the sa league as him when it cos to real-life skills.
A total loser when it cos to girls! In fact, among the so-called normie crew, Hayama's probably the only true normie.
Hikigaya actually felt sorry for him. The lengths he's going to, just to pretend he's normal — it's pitiful.
Why bother…? Stand tall, my fellow loser bro! Rise up and fap with pride!
"Ahem… The Jack of Diamonds must answer the question posed by the King of Hearts — truthfully!"
After sneakily peeking for quite a while and feeling the increasingly weird looks from others, Tobe finally blurted this out, drenched in sweat.
You need more courage, my dude!
"Who's the Jack of Diamonds?"
No one responded, so soone asked.
Totally oblivious…
Thinking that, Hikigaya suddenly rembered he hadn't looked at his card yet. So he took a glance—
What the hell?! It's !
"Uh, that's …" he chuckled awkwardly and showed his card.
"Seriously, Onii-chan, you're so un-self-aware!"
Komachi, never one to forget a grudge, imdiately seized the chance for payback.
But who's the King of Hearts?
"Hehehe…"
That laugh was even creepier than Komachi's earlier one.
Everyone turned toward the sound — only to see Hiratsuka Shizuka proudly revealing her card — the King of Hearts.
She gave Hikigaya a sideways glance, chuckled again, and said:
"Hikigaya, I won't make it hard for you. Just tell us how you managed to level up into such a scumbag after disappearing for a few sesters."
Hikigaya's face turned dark. How was he supposed to answer when the question already labels him a scumbag?
Single and still being called a scumbag — that's more tragic than being a virgin.
"That's right, Hikigaya-kun suddenly disappeared last sester. Even your parents ca to the school. It was worrying. What happened?" Hayama chid in, taking the chance to showcase his warm-and-caring persona.
Naturally, he earned praise from his diehard fan, Miura.
But the question genuinely sparked curiosity — everyone started bombarding him with questions, giving Hikigaya a splitting headache.
"STOP!" he shouted. "Actually, here's the truth: I was walking down the street when I t a martial arts master. He said I had unique bones — a once-in-a-century martial arts prodigy — so he took away to train."
Silence.
Even Komachi was stunned speechless by the sheer shalessness.
The Yomi disciples couldn't hold it in — especially the crown prince of Tidat Kingdom, Raden Tidat Jihan, the disciple of the Demon God Fist — he was barely keeping it together.
"Hey hey, Hikigaya-kun! You can't make stuff up like that! You're supposed to tell the truth!"
Tobe wailed.
"This is the truth," Hikigaya shrugged.
Well... if you ignore the middle part, it kinda is the truth.
"Komachi can vouch for him! Onii-chan's martial arts are aweso — just as cool as that big brother's demonstration!" Komachi quickly chid in.
GOOD! Family's got your back. Like they say: fight tigers with your brother, spout nonsense with your sister!
Still, he needed to follow through — Komachi looked really happy, and besides, flexing a little never hurts.
So he slapped the floor.
Everyone — even the Yomi disciples — felt the cards in their hands suddenly jolt. They couldn't hold on. Before their eyes, the cards whooshed through the air.
In the sa instant, Hikigaya reached out and swept all the cards into his hand.
Once again, dead silence.
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