I had a terrible thought.
Don’t tell these people—heroes—just go around without eating anything. Is that it!? I’m actually hungry!! I haven’t eaten a damn thing since last night! The only things I had were the hot chocolate the old man gave and the snacks Luman gave ! We left early this morning after all that chaos, and now you’re telling there’s nothing to eat?!
My whole body started trembling.
No. No, no. I need to take my dicine too....
The second I thought there was no food, the hunger ca crashing over even harder.
"There’s really nothing to eat? Not even snacks??"
"Sounds like you’re pretty hungry."
At Luman’s troubled voice, Temar knocked on the carriage window again.
"Ren."
"There’s nothing??"
I looked up at him desperately, my eyes shining.
I’m hungry! Brother!! I could literally pass out from being hungry!
His brows pulled together.
"I think you’ll have to hold out until tonight."
"...O-Okay! Of course I can hold out."
"Right. It’s not like Ren’s a little kid. Of course he can hold out, don’t you think?"
"Why are you picking a fight with ??"
What the hell. Where’d the guy handing out macarons earlier go? Why are you starting shit now!
I glared at Luman as he smiled and mocked , then shut my eyes.
Better to save my strength instead....
Until tonight. I can hold out until tonight.
Ah! My dicine.
I cracked my eyes open, quietly shut the window, and secretly took out my dicine and chewed it.
Yeah. Let’s think of this as a snack, a really delicious—my ass. It tastes fucking awful! It was the kind of harsh, bitter dicine that made want to scrape my whole tongue raw. Harsh enough that on bad days, my lips would swell and split from it!
Shit.
Still, I thought of the old apothecary and kept chewing the herbs down.
***
By the ti we’d gone along the narrow road for a while, the day had already faded into dusk.
Maybe because I’d taken my dicine without eating, my stomach burned. But I couldn’t show it. More than that, I’d already said I wouldn’t be a burden, and here I was whining about food. I’m seriously an idiot. What am I, a kid? I need to get it together.
To clear the dicine haze out of my head, I smacked my own cheek.
"Hm? What’s that?"
Sothing moved beyond the carriage window I’d cracked open for air.
What was it? I leaned out to get a better look.
But instead of brush, what I saw was a firm chest. My eyes traveled up from there and landed on Brother, wearing a stern expression.
"Brotheeer?"
My voice ca out rough and sleepy, and Temar pressed a hand to my forehead.
"Ren."
That voice was strict as hell.
"Why?"
What did I do?!
My voice ca out tight and nervous.
"Don’t stick your head out while we’re moving. It’s dangerous."
"Okay. Sorry."
I answered ekly.
His face seed to ease a little.
"We’re staying here tonight. I’m going to go hunt sothing we can eat, so stay with Luman. Got it?"
"Okay! But, Brother, just now I—"
"Right."
Without listening to another word, he swung down from his horse.
"Brother!"
That’s not what I ant—I think I just saw sothing!
"No, seriously... shit!"
I shook my head hard.
Sotis I swear Brother just can’t hear .
I glared at his back as it disappeared into the mountain woods before I could even really see it anymore, huffing to myself.
"Temar can be kind of a one-man army sotis."
The carriage door flew open.
Luman grinned and held out a hand.
"Shall we take a little break?"
"What am I, your girlfriend?"
"This is what people call manners, kid."
Ugh! What’s with the wink?!
"Then do whatever you want."
I pushed his hand away from a distance and hopped down.
Like I’m so loser who can’t even climb down by himself!!
More importantly—
"And Brother’s good at taking the lead, okay? He is not so one-man dictator or whatever the hell you were implying?? Don’t you know they say if you talk behind soone’s back when they’re not around, your ❀ Nоvеlігht ❀ (Don’t copy, read here) tongue gets cut out??"
What a ridiculous man.
"Hm."
Making a little humming sound, Luman grabbed one-handed just as I nearly pitched forward and planted my face into the dirt.
Fuck. I really am a loser.
Why the hell did I have to step on a rock right when I was getting down and lose my balance?! As I glared murder at the innocent rock, Luman poked my cheek with his finger.
Shit. How humiliating.
Luman was snickering to himself.
Was this guy even listening to what I was saying? I wanted to call him out on it, but I was too embarrassed.
Maybe he and Brother were actually closer than I was with him....
"What are you doing?"
I smacked his hand away and rubbed at my cheek.
"Making sure your eye didn’t pop out."
"I’m fine, okay?? I can take care of my own eyes!"
"Hm. Really?"
"Yes!! Mind your own business."
Why do you keep staring at like that?!
Luman’s gaze felt heavy.
It wasn’t unpleasant, exactly. It wasn’t annoying either.
But....
It felt like he could see right through . Like he was looking way too deep inside. From what I’d overheard when he talked with Brother, he seed like the kind of person who moved according to profit and loss.... So what was this kindness he kept showing ? Was he trying to use sohow through his relationship with Brother?
Nobody’s nice for free in this world!!
Yeah, I’d gobbled up those macarons without thinking, but... still. I’m not an idiot. No matter how sneaky and unreadable he felt, I could tell this man had at least a little interest in .
Not for filthy reasons like the baker’s son, obviously.... But still. There had to be so reason for this.
Even though I kept glaring at him warily, Luman didn’t seem to care much.
For a guy who’d twisted my arm so hard the first ti we t, what the hell kind of change of heart was this?
"Sit."
Luman spread his cloak out over a rock for .
"I’m fine."
I plopped down right on the dirt instead, and for a mont Luman just stood there in silence.
Then he left the cloak where it was, dropped down beside , and opened one hand.
A tiny light, like a firefly, blood in his palm and spread around us. The glittering little lights were small, but they made everything feel bright and warm.
Actually, it didn’t just feel that way.
The night air outside was so cold my hands should’ve been freezing, but a gentle warmth really was spreading around us.
"What is that?? Is this magic too? Is it the sa thing as what you showed before? Is it?"
"Are you interested in magic?"
"...Not really."
Shit! Why did I lean in like that!!
I straightened back up after pitching half my body toward Luman and turned my head away.
The mountain night was unbelievably dark, but tonight the moon was bright, so it was okay.
Our village really is way out in the middle of nowhere.
The village itself sat on a wide plain, so I’d never had any reason to go out and realize it. But had Brother always gone through roads this dark and winding every ti he headed for the capital?
The second I imagined all the roads Brother must’ve walked over and over again, my chest tightened so hard it felt like I might cry.
What the hell is wrong with ! I’m not so puberty-struck kid! I’m grown already. I need to act like it. I can’t be dead weight.
Ahem. I cleared my throat to myself, and Luman gave a strange look.
"If you call it magic, then it’s magic. If you don’t, then it isn’t."
At a flick of Luman’s fingers, the little cluster of lights drifted around like bugs.
"If you don’t want to tell , then just say that. It’s not like I’m gonna force it out of you."
"When we get to the capital, ask Verdi. He’s good at explaining things."
"Is he another hero?"
One of Brother’s companions?
"Yeah. He’s sharp. He’s good at explaining even complicated things."
Verdi. Verdi.
I engraved the na Luman gave into my mind.
The truth was, when I was little, my dream was to beco a wizard! A wizard who’d help Brother, defeat dragons, and rescue princesses! A hero’s companion, standing shoulder to shoulder with him!!
It wasn’t like I’d ever really hoped or imagined it could co true, not with this shitty body of mine.
But seeing sothing like magic with my own eyes made the curiosity I’d buried deep down jump right back up.
Sotis people discover their talent late, right? So maybe that could happen to too!
I was fiddling with my hands, imagining all the things I could do if I beca a wizard, when Luman suddenly grabbed my arm.
"What are you doing?"
Smack!
I flinched and knocked his hand right off , and Luman nodded.
"What was that for all of a sudden?"
Why the hell was he suddenly grabbing my wrist? Did he want to fight?
I was just about to start revving up, but Luman smiled in a strangely reassured way. The second I saw that face, I was so dumbfounded the anger drained right out of .
What the hell, seriously? What does he even want with ?
"Maybe it’s a good thing you’re prickly."
"What does that an? Why are you muttering to yourself like a lunatic?"
If you’re gonna talk to yourself, do it where I can’t hear you. When is Brother coming back? This is awkward as hell...!
"Hey."
"...?"
Even in the middle of the night, Luman’s face looked like it was glowing.
More than a hero, he looked like so highborn nobleman who had everything going for him.
He stared at with those dark amber eyes like he was trying to seduce .
"Say... what you’re going to say."
I swallowed hard.
Wait! That makes sound like so kind of pervert! Don’t swallow like that!
I forced myself to keep my breathing under control and waited for Luman’s answer, and then a voice ca out that was absurdly light and cheerful compared to how serious his face was.
"Want to kill him for you?"
"Kill what? Who?"
"That man."
Luman said it quietly.
His eyes were sparkling with mischief.
"...?"
What the hell. Was he joking?
"From what I saw earlier, it doesn’t look like his hands have only been a problem for a day or two. So maybe...."
"Maybe what?"
"No. n like that are better off not existing in that village, don’t you think?"
"Not really."
I answered flatly, completely uninterested.
Whether that guy lived or died, what did it have to do with ?
"But you hated it earlier. Don’t tell he’s a man you’ve had your eye on?"
One of Luman’s brows knit slightly.
He put on a look like he understood perfectly.
"What the hell? Why would I like so moron like that?? Is there sothing wrong with your head? Why are you picking a fight with soone who was just sitting here minding his own busi—... self?"
Whew!
No matter what, he’s still Brother’s friend, so I couldn’t exactly say "bullshit" to his face. I’d just scream it in my head instead! Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit! I didn’t like that mocking tone of his either! I fud inwardly.
Good job, Ren!! You held it in, Ren!
Sothing about Luman’s expression changed.
"You were the one cursing him out and telling him to get lost."
"And that’s the sa as killing him?"
That was so ridiculous I could barely process it.
"If soone commits a cri, they should be punished."
What?
I blinked slowly.
Coming out of a face that was absurdly beautiful, the words sounded calm.
And completely sincere.
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