As a modern person with normal XP, Xu Yun definitely has no inappropriate thoughts about a little girl of five or six.
After all, he’s not so kind of obsessee—he’s a staunch supporter of Tifa.
But likewise, naturally, he wouldn’t have too much defense, especially when the other party appeared in Little Niu’s uncle’s ho, clearly as a family mber.
Unexpectedly...
This young man launched a sneak attack upon eting, hurling a lump of cow dung face-first?
Thus caught off guard, Xu Yun was flabbergasted as the cow dung splattered all over his head.
Seeing this situation, William Asku beside Xu Yun imdiately turned pale with anger.
He quickly helped Xu Yun dust off the cow dung with one hand while shouting furiously in a high G pitch:
"Li——la——ni——!!!"
As Newton’s closest elder—literally the only one, how could William not know how socially reclusive his nephew is?
If fighting counts as intimate contact, Little Niu is definitely the King of the Sea, invincible throughout Lincolnshire in that regard.
But setting aside the fights for proper friendship discussion, Little Niu truly has not a single friend to greet.
Therefore, when he first saw Xu Yun—especially with that bandage wrapped around Xu Yun’s head, William’s first reaction was that Little Niu had provoked so noble child and brought him over to ask for dical expenses.
And this distinguished ’VIP’ guest was greeted by his young daughter with a headful of cow dung?
At this mont, William had only one thought:
Oh my god, it’s a disaster!
However, facing her aggressive father, the little girl nad Lilani showed no fear.
She cheekily stuck out her tongue and bounded off towards the end of the living room:
"Mama, sister, the monster has caught brother Isaac!!!"
Xu Yun and William and Little Niu:
"...."
Then William snapped back to his senses, quickly dusting off the cow dung from Xu Yun, and kept apologizing:
"I’m sorry, Mr. Feiyu, I sincerely apologize to you!
That is my youngest daughter, Lilani Asku. I’ve been away for years, unable to discipline her, causing this ss now.....
Oh, rest assured, I will definitely teach her a good lesson!"
Xu Yun kept his head down, frantically shaking off the cow dung, while helplessly raising a bitter smile:
I was wondering who it could be, turns out it’s this naughty child.....
Lilani Asku, the youngest daughter of William Asku.
In a letter Newton wrote to Stukeley in 1703, Old Niu once ntioned a mischievous act by this little rascal:
At that ti, William Asku was hosting a guest from Sweden, and due to the esteed status of the guest, William began preparations early.
Upon learning of this, Lilani Asku sohow got her hands on a big bucket of cow dung and gave the guest a sudden ’justice from above’ upon arrival.
Old Niu didn’t elaborate too much about what followed, but the scene must have been quite awkward, and Lilani likely couldn’t escape a round of mixed hand-slapping from both parents.
Unexpectedly, after my own crossing, this event that should have happened at the end of 1667, happened to instead?
Careless.....
anwhile, with the commotion at the door, the people waiting inside the house were also gradually alard and ca out:
The first to appear was Lisa Asku, whom we saw earlier.
At this mont, the girl was carrying the runaway Lilani Asku, with Lilani holding up a white flag made in Gaul, waving it wantingly to surrender.
Lisa Asku originally carried this little troublemaker with ease, like lifting a chick, but her expression froze upon seeing Little Niu and she quickly released her, assuming a reserved posture.
Following her was a pair of twelve or thirteen-year-old twins, with a rather thin build, seemingly sowhat malnourished.
The four sisters appeared from the left passage, chirping and chattering a few words, and finally Lisa Asku said sothing towards the room that seed to be the kitchen.
Soon, a slightly plump middle-aged woman ca out:
She was wearing an apron, holding so water-soaked wild vegetables in one hand, and a knife of West Garden Temple World size in the other:
Obviously, this was William Asku’s wife, and since I couldn’t find out her na, we’ll just call her Mrs. Williams.
Seeing this scene at the entrance, Mrs. Williams blinked and quickly walked up:
"Dear, what happened?"
William nonchalantly took a piece of cow dung from behind Xu Yun’s ear and pointed at Lilani across the way:
"She, guest, cow dung."
The concise three words imdiately made Mrs. Williams understand what happened.
So, this matriarch didn’t bother greeting Little Niu and joined in on the poop cleaning battle.
As for Little Niu.....
He simply dusted off a few bits for the sake of face and then stood aside, exchanging flirtatious glances with Lisa Asku, wishing his eyeballs could pop out....
Fortunately, this ti Lilani threw relatively dry cow dung, and the hit area wasn’t Xu Yun’s face.
Thus, after a good deal of chaos, Mrs. Williams brought two buckets of freshly heated hot water, leading Xu Yun outside to give his head a quick rinse with blueberry juice.
Everything cleaned up, Xu Yun followed Mrs. Williams back inside.
By now, William’s whole family, including Little Niu, had gathered by the fireplace, with William sitting in the center looking stern, the twin sisters quietly waiting at the side, while Little Niu and Lisa Asku continued their eye-flirting ga.
As for Lilani.....
The little girl stood alone beside William, her reddened eyes indicating that the little troublemaker had already received a round of bamboo-stick punishnt.
Seeing Xu Yun enter, William hurried to his feet and led Lilani to his side:
"Lilani, apologize quickly!"
Lilani pouted, rubbed her left arm, and gloomily said:
"I’m sorry, Mr. Feiyu."
Beside her, William took out a piece of sea buckthorn tree wood—with many thorns on its branches, which could easily scratch skin:
"Mr. Feiyu, according to Commiss Law, you may now administer no more than 20 strokes to Lilani."
Xu Yun had originally planned to be tactful, but upon hearing this, he paused and rembered sothing:
Oh, right, this is the United Kingdom, where bizarre laws are as common as grass!
As the birthplace of common law, the UK’s legal system has had a profound impact on countries worldwide.
UK laws are among the most enduring and ancient in the world.
So current laws were enacted hundreds of years ago, incredibly bizarre, and remain in effect to this day.
For example, the 1848 "Treason Felony Act," under which, if a postage stamp bearing the British Queen’s image is affixed upside down, it would be considered treason.
There’s also the 1998 "Terrorism and Conspiracy Act," which states that any British citizen who detonates a nuclear device to mutual destruction, regardless of at ho or abroad, will be subject to life imprisonnt.
And if a whale dies on the beach, its head automatically belongs to the Queen, with the Queen having first rights to the whale’s tail. (Recomnded reading: "The Strange Laws of Old England," it’s really fascinating).
Therefore, it wouldn’t be surprising for the British in the seventeenth century to co up with a disciplinary law for naughty children.
However, although the law permits, Xu Yun, adhering sowhat to modern values, felt that disciplining the naughty child might not be good for her...
So Xu Yun thought for a mont and ca to a decision.
He extended his right arm into a fist, lifting the little troublemaker’s left hand toward his own right hand in parallel.
Then, picking up the bamboo pole, he struck with moderate force, three tis.
After three blows.
A large and small, yellow and white arm both bore three superficial but bleeding welts.
Then Xu Yun pointed to Lilani’s arm and told her:
"This is the punishnt you deserve, considering your young age, I only hit three tis."
Then he pointed to his own bleeding right hand and said earnestly:
"This is my self-punishnt for disciplining a little girl, unrelated to the law, but concerning morality."
Opposite him, Lilani, usually fearless, suddenly froze in surprise, gazing bewilderedly at her arm, her mouth moved, but she said nothing.
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