Her?
Celestia?
The very idea that she would be the one to hesitate that she would be the one asured?evaluated? And even warned ignited sothing sharp and instinctive inside her. Her chin lifted almost imperceptibly, shoulders drawing back into perfect alignnt as though her spine itself rejected the implication. She t his crimson gaze head-on, unflinching, regal, composed. Even if that faint, traitorous shiver still lingered beneath her skin, she did not allow it to reach her expression.
He thinks I won’t dare? The thought cut through her like a blade. He thinks I’ll back down?
Her pride would never allow that. Pride was not just emotion for her; it was structure. It was foundation. It was identity. She had been raised to rule, raised to dominate, raised to stand above all others without wavering. To falter in front of him or anyone was unthinkable thing to do for her.. To leavel of tabbo to be scared and spressed by anyone.
And yet, beneath that towering pride, beneath the competitive spark flaring in her chest, sothing else stirred quietly, stubbornly. It was not doubt in her strength. It was not fear of defeat. It was sothing far more destabilizing.
Uncertainty.
Not about whether she could kill him.. Or he could kill her? Having needed strength or or whatever. No
Not that..
But about whether he would truly kill her.
That was the fracture in her composure. That was what unsettled her.
She simply could not reconcile the Razeal she had known with the man standing before her now. The boy from childhood. The one who had walked beside her, argued with her, laughed with her. The one who had once looked at her with sothing warr than anything.. She had even felt. She knew the history between them. Yes, she knew whatever had happened, whatever choices she had made, whatever cold decisions she had justified.. But still there had once been sothing real between them.
She herself would never want him dead.. Or could want him dead.
The thought alone made her chest tighten.
Even in past..
When she had thought that he had truly died... When he never returned... she still doesn’t know how she had processed that. She rembered those months. The uncertainty. The silence. The fruitless searches. The creeping conclusion that perhaps he was gone forever. She had carried that weight privately. Yes, Even thoigh she had never allowed it to show.. not to her mother or anyone else. But it had been there. A quiet, suffocating trauma she had buried beneath her pride and everything.
He disappeared because of .
That was the sentence she had never voiced aloud.
And when he had ca back.. when she saw him alive she had been relieved. Genuinely relieved. Even though she never showed it.. which she actually never do.. or did.
But again
Instead, she had done sothing far more telling in her own language right? She had bowed her head to him. She had apologized.That alone should have proven sothing. For soone like her to do that.. That alone was monuntal. She had taken his side from that point onward, over and over again, even when it complicated her position. Even when it was politically reckless.
Like..
Against Maria. Against Arabella. Against Virelans? When he had fought the holy duel, she had told him openly that she have his back him. Even if he lost she won’t let him suffer.. Even when doing that was totally wrong.
Like literally it could’ve totally risked destabilizing her authority.
She had supported him against the Virelans when it was strategically unwise. She had humiliated Arabella in the arena by invoking her imperial bloodline suppression, forcing her to return the bloodline essence he had extracted. She had even permitted him to enter the Eternal Hold because he wanted to, despite knowing it would dissapoint her mother, despite knowing it would make her appear weak before the four ducal houses who watched that judgnt.
Despite knowing how that would look.
Despite knowing it would weaken her image.
Despite knowing the four ducal houses would interpret it as softness in her character.. And take him as her clear weakness.
She had done it anyway.
For him.
Were these not proof enough?
Proof that she had chosen him repeatedly?That she’s on his side?
And now
Now he stood in front of her with those crimson eyes and told her he would cut off her head.
For her.
For Maria..?
At first she had taken it as a joke. A dramatic line. A wounded man posturing. But the longer she held his gaze, the more that explanation collapsed. There was no mockery in his eyes. No lingering affection softened by anger. No hesitation.
He ant it.
Or even if not.. lets say not for her or just whatver reason.
To kill her?
He ant it.
And that realization pierced her in a way no blade could.
Her platinum eyes shimred faintly. Not with weakness.. never that but with sothing like moisture gathering at the edges. The brilliant clarity of her irises seed almost brighter for a mont, like light refracting through glass. A thin layer of wetness coated her eyes, giving them an unnatural sparkle. But no tear fell.
And.. None ever would.
She would rather sever her own head than allow a tear to slide down her face. Not because he might see it. Not because anyone could or would.. But because she would know. And she could not tolerate that. In her mind, crying was surrender. It was exposure. It was weakness. And she despised weakness above all else.
Her heart felt pierced, yes.. but she would not dignify that pain with tears.
The silence between them thickened into sothing almost tangible, like a pressure field coiling around their bodies. Even the wind seed to hesitate. Dust hovered mid-air, reluctant to settle.
While Sofia just stood at the edge of that invisible line, Maria unconscious but secure in her arms, her sharp eyes flicking between the two of them.
Honestly even she had never seen Razeal like that.. Like that composed or frighteningly steady on sothing.. Like that.. Like in no way she had ever expected him to try to declare war on so empire for maria.. as how he usually treat her.. It was genuinely weird to her.
The air felt volatile between both celestia and Razeal.. Like just one misstep away from catastrophe.
When suddenly
"Alright... I won’t," Celestia said at last.
Her voice was steady, but her eyes betrayed her. They trembled.. just slightly as she held his gaze. She nodded once, then again, faster than her pride would normally ever allow.
"Good decision," Razeal replied.
His face did not change. No relief. No satisfaction. No visible triumph. He simply acknowledged it. If she had followed through... if she had truly driven that blade into Maria’s chest... things would have turned into sothing irreparable. Actually even he himself was mildly surprised that she really stepped back. This was Celestia afterall the girl who had once severed her own feelings with surgical precision at ten years old just because she deed them inconvenient. The girl who could abandon sentint in favor of strategy without blinking. For her to halt, to reconsider, to withdraw after being challenged like that.. it did not align with the version of her he rembered honestly.
But anyways.. it worked in his favor.
Fighting her now would have been disastrous.
He did not want a war. Not yet.
Harming the imperial princess.. even if he could would invite the full weight of the empire upon him. And not quietly. It would beco public. Political and very Strategic. The kind of conflict that would sabotage everything he was currently planning on building. He needed recognition. Reputation. Influence beyond borders to change his fate.. And If the empire went on war with him.. People would die and.. his reputation will go in drain as he be labelled as person to wage the war and be evil..
And..
Only a fool would trigger a war in this situation he is right now.
So he was not a fool.
Doing that be literally again all his future intrests.
Stupid thing to do.
But that led to a different question again.. one he did not fully enjoy asking himself.
If strategy was his priority... then why had he taken such a decisive stance over Maria?
He could have simply warned Celestia. Could’ve just taken maria and ran away? Could have restrained celestia without threatening her life. Could have handled it in a hundred more politically cautious ways.
Instead, he had drawn a line in first place.
Why?
Why had he been willing.. so willing to threaten her like that?
Honestly he doesn’t know..
Like whatever Maria was to him.. however undefined, however complicated one fact remained.. she was stil his person. Amd not to say in his worst mont, when monsters had sward him and he needed ti just ti to recover she had stood between him and death. She had protected him. She had nearly died doing it. He still rembered the sight of her collapsing, the blood, the desperation.
And not to say there is one more thing..
Like if he allowed her to be killed in front of him now, without intervening, then how exactly does that make him any different from Celestia or Selena.
Didn’t they did the sa? Who sacrificed him for their own selfis reasons?
And he doesn’t want to look like them at all.
That was a line he refused to cross.
He would not beco that.
Even if he could justify it logically, even if politically it made sense, even if it simplified future variables.. he would despise himself.
And at sa ti suddenly..
Another layer complicated the matter arose.
Why had he not killed Celestia before?
Why had he never fully committed to erasing either her or Selena, despite everything that happened?
Was it restraint? Was it lingering attachnt? Was it simply petty pride? refusing to dirty his hands further on such small matger? Or was he unconsciously searching for justification every ti he chose not to act?
He did not have a clean answer.
The truth unsettled him.
He doesn’t know.
Like maybe he was conflicted? Maybe part of him was simply impulsive. Emotional. Trauma-driven. He had noticed sothing lately he no longer calculated purely with cold logic. His decisions increasingly aligned with instinct, with feeling, with sothing darker and sharper than reason.
Was that the vampire blood?
Or was that just him?
He did not know.
He only knew that when he saw Celestia raise that sword, sothing in him had reacted before thought caught up.
That alone unsettled him.
Anyway, he didn’t say anything more. It was better that way. If she didn’t want to do it, pushing her would only create a ss. So he simply turned around to leave.
"I won’t," Celestia said suddenly from behind him. "You know why?"
He paused.
Slowly, he turned back to face her
"It’s because you said it," Celestia began, her voice steadier than her trembling eyes suggested. She held his crimson gaze without looking away, even as the faint sheen of moisture made her platinum irises shimr unnaturally bright. "Because I don’t want us to fight. Not because I fear death. Not because I’m afraid of a fight or anything or whatever." Her chin lifted slightly as she clarified that, pride still woven into her posture. "I just don’t want to create problems for you. Or between us.. I.. I just don’t want to hurt you. Or have you hurt . I never want that ti to co." Her voice thinned slightly on the last words, but she forced them out clearly, nodding once as if sealing her own confession. "That is why I’m stepping back."
Razeal simply looked at her.
No flicker of warmth. No shift in expression. His face remained unreadable, crimson eyes steady and distant. If anything, there was a faint tightness around his jaw, but it was impossible to tell whether it was restraint or indifference. He did not respond. In truth, he did not want to engage in this conversation at all. Speaking with her stirred sothing unpleasant inside him.. sothing close to disgust, close to repulsion, a reminder of wounds he preferred to keep scarred over. Without replying, he began to turn away again.
"Why did you do it?" Celestia Suddenly asked.. Her voice ca quickly, almost urgently, stopping him mid-motion.
He paused, irritation flickering faintly as he turned his head back toward her again. "Do what?"
"You know what I an." Her brows drew together, eyes trembling more visibly now. "You didn’t need to say that.. That you would kill ." Her voice cracked slightly, though she tried to smooth it out. "Why did you say it?"
"And?" Razeal though just replied flatly honestly confused what she was getting at..
"Oh, co on." She exhaled sharply, frustration breaking through her sadness. "You don’t need to act like this. You know and I know that you know.. that if you had simply said it, I would have done whatever it was." She lifted her hand briefly, pointing toward Maria’s direction before letting it fall again. "That thing. Whatever it was. If you had asked lightly, I would’ve done it. Why did you have to say it like that?" Her voice lowered, wounded. "It hurted .. you know? I’m sure I made it clear that I still care for you. Why are you doing this?" She looked at him genuinely, no arrogance left in her expression.. only confusion and pain.
Razeal finally understood it.
Though he just shook his head. "Maybe because I ant it," he said calmly. "Why should I care if it hurts you?" His tone sharpened just slightly. "After what you did to , do you really think I don’t want to hurt you?" His crimson eyes hardened. "What imaginary world are you living in? You’re acting like nothing ever happened. Wake up." His voice lost its earlier calm and gained a thin edge of bitterness. "I haven’t done anything to you yet because I don’t have the power I want. But one day, I will and then I’ll co for you to make you regret it. That’s a promise I gave you." His gaze flicked briefly over her face, recalling the faint smugness she had worn earlier.. the confidence that he wouldn’t truly harm her because of what they once were in childhood. As if no matter what she had done, she would always remain important to him. He couldn’t believe soone could be that delusional.. "And stop believing there’s sothing between us. There isn’t."
Celestia’s lips pressed together, the moisture in her eyes thickening but still refusing to spill. She shook her head slowly, as if trying to reject his version of reality. "Just... when are you going to stop this?" she asked softly, sadness plain in her voice now. She did not try to mask it. Not this ti. The usual composure she wore like armor was cracked open, vulnerability seeping through the fractures.
"What?" Razeal asked, tilting his head slightly, genuinely not understanding what she was implying.
"Self-pitying yourself," she replied, her voice gaining a fragile intensity. "When are you going to stop it? Because the only thing you are doing with it is hurting yourself nothing more.." She inhaled shakily. "I told you my reason. I told you why I made that mistake. And I know you know.. That you can understand my selfishness And also separate it clearly that you know it was never.. never my intent to hurt you." Her eyes pleaded with him to acknowledge that truth. "I know you know that I care about you. I’ve shown it at every turn since you ca back. I’ve tried to make you feel it clearly." Her voice trembled but did not break. "I’ve already apologized. If I didn’t care about you, I would never have done that. I had no reason to. I tried to show you how much I regret it... how much I loathe myself for what I did. That very sa day, when I bowed my head to you."
She stepped forward slightly, not aggressively, but earnestly. "You know what it ant right? When I bowed my head to you that day?You know my personality.. You know that I would rather have my head cut off than bow it. I have never bowed my head to anyone. Not even my mother.. Not fucking once." Her breathing grew uneven, emotion finally seeping fully into her tone. "You’re the only person in this world I’ve ever done that for. And ever will." Her platinum eyes, wet but unyielding, locked onto his crimson ones. "You should understand what that ans, Shouldn’t you?"
Celestia’s eyes narrowed slightly, still glistening with unshed tears. She held his gaze without looking away, as if willing him to finally see what she could not put into simpler words. The moisture in her platinum eyes trembled like as if asking.. How could he not understand?
"Apologized? Bowed your head?" Razeal echoed flatly, and this ti there was no restraint in the mockery that edged his tone. He lifted his hand between them and tilted his palm downward in an exaggerated, almost theatrical angle, rotating it lazily as though asuring degrees. "You did this," he said, lowering his palm perhaps one hundred and eighty degrees, maybe a little more, mimicking a shallow dip. "This is what you’re calling bowing your head?" His crimson eyes hardened. "You barely moved your chin. Not even your neck. Not to say your back. And you expect to treat that like so sacred gesture?" The disdain in his voice sharpened. "Don’t dress it up as humility. It wasn’t."
Celestia flinched.. not physically in recoil, but in the subtle tightening of her jaw. She shook her head slowly, as though rejecting his interpretation, and took one careful step toward him. There was no arrogance in her posture now. No imperial authority. Just hurt. The kind of hurt that ca from not being understood.
"That... that’s not what it was," she said quietly, her voice trembling in a way she could not fully control. "You know it wasn’t." Her platinum eyes glistened, not yet shedding tears, but undeniably wet. "If you want to apologize again, I will. If you want to bow properly, I will. If you want to kneel... I will." Her breath wavered. "You know what.. I would even put my head at your feet if that’s what it takes for you to understand that I ant it. But the condition is this.." She swallowed, stepping closer until there was only a single step between them. "When i bow down.. You shouldn’t feel pride or arrogance but feel the love behind it."
Her voice cracked slightly on the word love.
Razeal’s gaze did not leave hers. He saw the moisture gathering at the edge of her irises. He saw the trembling she was trying to suppress. His own eyes narrowed faintly.. not in anger this ti, but in scrutiny. He searched her expression for insincerity and found none. Just looking for if she’s bullshiting because he genuinely cant beleive she could fucking do this shitt..
Silence descended over them, thick and suffocating.
They stood one step apart, breathing the sa air, staring into eyes that once reflected childhood promises, shared secrets, and unspoken futures. Celestia’s lashes quivered slightly as she held his gaze, refusing to look away even though her composure felt like glass under pressure.
But just then..
Flutter. Flutter.
The sharp slicing of wind cut through the tension.
Razeal’s attention shifted upward instantly, his instincts reacting before his thoughts did. Celestia did not move. She remained where she stood, still facing him, though she sensed the shift in his focus.
Golden light descended from the sky.
Selena.
She had flown back with reckless speed, pushed to the very edge of the capital by his shadow displacent, yet she had returned as if distance ant nothing. The radiant wings of golden light behind her shimred violently, each beat of them fueled by desperation and everything. She did not slow properly when she landed; she nearly stumbled as her feet touched the ground, montum carrying her forward.
As at sa ti her eyes found him imdiately.
Razeal.
And just as she did
The tears flowed back openly agaian.. now tracing trembling lines down her cheeks as she stared at him like soone who had just found oxygen after drowning again.. which she had went into extre panic mode again when she had suddenly lost his in her sight suddenly monts ago..
Finally breathed again as found him back with her eyes again.
She had literally not took breath when found him not in her gaze and flew all the wa from here without taking any breath.
And now..
She ran toward him, hand extended instinctively, as though afraid he might vanish if she did not reach him quickly enough.
But then.. again.
Just a few steps away from him, she stopped.
Not because she wanted to.
But because she didn’t know how to cross that final distance.
The reality of him standing there, alive and tangible, suddenly overwheld her. Her outstretched hand trembled midair before slowly lowering back to her side. The confidence she had gathered in her flight dissolved into uncertainty again. How do you approach soone you once loved, once accused, once lost?
Razeal turned fully toward her now too as his attention left Celestia entirely.
He looked at Selena in silence.
There was no visible anger on his face. No warmth either. Just stillness. His crimson eyes rested on her tear-streaked expression, absorbing the desperation written across her features. He saw the exhaustion in her posture, the subtle shaking of her fingers, the way her chest rose and fell unevenly.
Silence lingered.
What do I say? Where do I start? Do I apologize first? Do I explain? Do I ask if he’s okay? Do I..
Selena opened her mouth, then closed it. Her throat felt tight. Words crowded her mind.. apologies, explanations, confessions but none of them seed strong enough to carry the weight of guilt and fear of lifeti.
He’s fine, she told herself desperately. He’s alive. He’s here.. Front of her.. Face to face?
The simple relief of seeing him unbroken struck her harder than any anger she had prepared to face.
Her lips curved upward in what she tried to make into a beautiful smile. It was fragile, trembling at the edges, but genuine. The kind of smile that cos when your heart finds what it thought it had lost forever.
Tears spilled faster.
She didn’t wipe them.
She just looked at him.
As if her entire world had re-centered on that one figure standing in front of her.
Now he was here.
Alive.
Real.
To listen to her.. She can explain
Her chest felt like it might burst from the intensity of it.
She inhaled shakily.
"H..h... he..hey..." she managed, her voice trembling uncontrollably despite her effort to steady it. She tried to smile again through tears. "You’re... you’re okay..."
Her words were simple. Almost childish.
But they carried everything she couldn’t yet say.
Her shoulders shook slightly as she fought the urge to collapse into him. She didn’t dare step closer without permission. Didn’t dare assu she still had that right.
In her eyes was sothing unmistakable.
Not pride.
Not arrogance.
Not even hope.
Just love.
Pure, raw, and unguarded.
The kind that survives accusation, separation, humiliation, and guilt.
The kind that does not die easily.
She wanted to apologize. To confess. To explain the truth she had tried to reveal before being imprisoned. To tell him she never stopped loving him. To beg him to hate her less. To tell him she would trade her life to erase the pain he endured because of her.
But none of those words ford.
All she could do was whisper that.. stand there, trembling, crying, smiling through it, staring at him as if he were the only thing left in existence.
----
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