“Whatdoesthatan....”
“fyou’recuriousaboutsothing,askproperly.Socananswer.”
“.......”
fKwonaehangotinvolved,plausibilitycouldberesolveduptoacertainpoint.wouldn’tbeabletotellhiverythingofmyownwill,butsothinglikethiskindofloophole......they’dprobablyallowit.Maybe.
henwhyhadn’t“SeoJehyun”triedtoletKwonaehanknowthisbefore?
‘Because’dhavetokillhimagain?’
fyouhadtokeeprepeatingsothingwhenyoudidn’tevenknowwhenitwouldfinallysucceed,you’dprobablywanttoshoveasidelittleriskslikethat.ButhadneverintendedfromthestarttobearKwonaehan’sthousandlives.
couldseethelookinKwonaehan’seyesashetriedtoreadwhatwasthinking.
‘e’stakingfuckingforever...thinking.’
presseddownhardonthetipofhisshoe,aningtohurryhimalong.Kwonaehan’sbrowstwitchedstrangely,maybebecauseeventhatcausedafaintstabofpain.
Afterafairamountoftihadpassed,Kwonaehanslowlyaskedinasubduedvoice,
“Doyou...know?”
“Well,you?hewholecountryknowsyou.”
“andoyouknowwhatthisquestionans.”
Becausehisvoicehaddroppedsolow,italmostfeltalittlelikewasbeingthreatened.otthatitfeltthreateningatall,ofcourse.
lookedatKwonaehanforamont,thenansweredsimply.
“Yeah.”
Atthat,Kwonaehan,whohadbeenmovinghislipslikehe◈оvеlіgһт◈(Continuereading)wasabouttopouroutquestionsatonce,closedhismouthagain.
hereweregapsbetweenhisquestions.didn’tthinkhewasthetypetothinkthisdeeply,butitlookedlikehewasearnestlyworkinghisbrain.
leftKwonaehantothinkonhisownandquietlyobservedhim.Wehadn’tactuallybeenfacetofacethatmanytis,buthefeltexcessivelyfamiliar.
Wheneverthoughtaboutthe“SeoJehyun”Kwonaehansearchedforandevenresented,feltastrangesenseofdissonance.haddefinitelylookedintothatpointinthepastseveraltis,andsotis’devenbeenassimilatedintoit,butthatstilldidn’tmakeitmymory.Atbest,itwaslikewatchingitalittlemoreclosely......likeavideo.
Butseparatefromthat,didfeellike’dknownKwonaehanforaverylongti.
Kwonaehanstaredatforalongwhilewithcomplicatedeyes,thenopenedhismouth.
“hat’salie.”
What?
heguywhohadbeenstrugglingwithhimselfjustmontsagospokeinafirmvoiceallatonce.Forasecond,mybrowfurrowedwithoutrealizingit.
“You’rejustmakingassumptionsbecauseofhow’vebeenacting,figuringthere’ssothingthere.hefactthatyouwon’ttelldirectlyandaremakingaskquestionstoo...you’retryingtodrawwordsoutof.”
“Whatareyoutalkingabout?”
“You’regoodatpsychologicalgas...andeverytisothinglikethishappens,youactclever.”
Foramont,thatinsanebullshitpouringoutofhismouthalmostmadegrabhimbythecollar.Kwonaehankepttalkingstubbornlythroughmybaffledreactionanyway.
“Youprobablywon’tunderstandevenifsaythis.......Butit’scertainsothinghaschanged.Andthere’snowaythat’sbecauseofyou.”
“aehan,getittogether.”
“already...amtogether.”
Sayingthat,Kwonaehanaddedcalmly,
“fwasn’t,would’vebelievedyouagainthisti.”
Withthosewords,feltKwonaehan’shandremoveminefromhisarm.esteppedback,thenwidenedthedistancethathadclosedbetweenus.
“Asettlent....Dowhateveryouwant.don’twanttogetinvolvedwithyouanymore.Atleastnotthisti.”
“.......”
“Justonce...please.”
Forsooneusingthewordplease,hedidn’tlookallthatdesperate....Wasthisanotherresultofemotionalwearandtear?
Whenlightlyfurrowedmybrow,Kwonaehanstaredsowhereelseforalongwhile,thenturnedhisheadbacktoward.
didn’tsayanything.justwaitedforKwonaehanquietly.elookedatlikehestillhadmorehewantedtosay,groundhisteethslightly,theninaninstantletallthestrengthgooutofhimself.
“And,SeoJehyun.”
“.......”
“venifeverythingyousaidistrue,stillwon’ttrustyou.”
hadn’tansweredanythinghe’dsaidthiswholeti,butthisoncecouldn’thelpaskingback.
“Why?”
“Becauseevenifeverywordyousaidisthetruth,it’sstillbetternottotrustyou.”
Withthat,Kwonaehanlefthishospitalroom.
o,tobeexact,hetriedtoleave,andtheattemptfailedprettyeasily.grabbedKwonaehanashewasfiddlingwiththedoorlock,spunhimaround,andshovedhimagainstthewall.
“Ugh!”
bracedanarmtightlynearKwonaehan’sshoulder,pinninghiminplacesohecouldn’tmove.
“hereareCCcaraseverywhere,anddon’twanttomakethepicturelookweird,sohowaboutwekeeptalkingalittlelonger,quietly?fonemorestrangescandalbreaksout,feellikesoone’sreallygoingtokill.”
“Areyoudoingthisbecauseyouwantyourarmbrokenorsothing?”
“o,hategettinghurt.”
loosenedmyarmandpressedthecenterofKwonaehan’schestwithmypalm,blockinghimfromgettingpast.houghifKwonaehanreallydecidedtouseforce,hecouldbreakoutofthisinnoti.
“akeyourhandoff.Beforeknockitawaywithforce.”
“Don’tshowoffyourstrengthagainstsooneweaker...andlistentotheend.”
“Weaker?a,sincewhendidyou...?”
easilyignoredwhatKwonaehansaidandsmiledaslookedathimquietly.
“ow....aehan,thinkaboutthissimply.”
“.......”
“venifyoukeeptryingtoavoid,itwon’treallydomuch.You’regoingtokeepgoingaroundclearingatesanyway,andthedia’sgoingtoshowyoucountlesstis.fyouhatethat,thenstartlivingasarecluserightnow.ohideyourselfquietlyonsoislandnobodyknowsthenaof...thenmaybewon’tbeabletofindyou.”
“.......”
“Butthere’snowayyou’ddothat.Youknowthatyourself,don’tyou?”
slowlyletthestrengthoutofthehandthathadbeenpressingagainsthischesttoholdhiminplace.WaitingforKwonaehan’sgaze,whichhadbrieflydroppedtomyhand,torisebackuptomyeyes,wentoninaneasyvoice.
“Don’tthinksothingliketoday...isonlygoingtohappenonce...justwait.”
“a....SeoJehyun,areyoufuckingkiddingrightnow?couldkillyourightnow,thissecond.heonlyreason’mnot...”
“henwanttotrykilling?”
cutoffKwonaehan’spatheticwordsandaskedseriously.
“...What?”
hadthoughtonceortwicethatmightlethimkillonce.Well,if’dkilledhim999tis,thendyingoncemyselfwasn’texactlyaloss.fcourse,ifheactuallycaattryingtokill,it’dbefuckingawful.
grabbedKwonaehan’shandwhereithadfallenlimpathissideandpulledituptomyneck.couldseehimbracingandresistinghalfwaythrough,butnotenoughtomakeitdifficulttoforcehishandaroundmythroat.
“etgo.”
“owaboutwetradeonceeach?don’tmind.”
Rightafterthat,feltasharpstingingpainatmyneck,andhishandwasroughlytornaway.Whenlightlybrushedthespotwhereithurt,athinbeadofbloodhadford.
“You...!”
“Setupanoffice.t’llbebetterforyoutobeattachedtoaguildanyway.”
“.......”
“here’snoguildouttherethat’llsuityourtaste,soputyourownnaononeandbuildit.”
venifdidn’tsaysothinglikethis,afterrepeatingseverallives,hewouldendupfoundingaguildonhisownanyway.Butifthatgotpulledalittleearlier,thingswouldgetaloteasier.
“Yeah,allthatlong-windedcontact...don’tneedthateither.”
“.......”
“But’llcofindyou.Whetherit’smycuriosityoryourquestions...ifsothingcosupthatneedstoberesolved?Ah,justsoyouknow,’mverycuriousaboutalotofthings.vennow.”
“.......”
“Sothinkcarefully.”
antthat.fanotherdaycawhenweendeduptalkinginahospitalroomagain,fromthatpointonitwouldbeprettyfunny.
Withthat,leftthehospitalroom.utside,sawDoYehyunwaitingquietlyfor.
“et’sgo.”
“...Whataboutthesettlent?”
“esaidhe’ddoit.Doesn’tseemlikehecaresmuch,though.”
Wewentdowntothefirstfloor,talkedaboutthebrokenlock,gavethemJooSeowon’snumberasthecontactforfuturecompensation,andthenimdiatelycaughtataxioutside.
WhilesittingsidebysidewithDoYehyuninthebackseat,suddenlygotcuriousabouttheexpressiononhisfaceandturnedtolookathim.
“Sointheendtherewasnopointbringingyoualongtoday.Wedidn’tevengettogointothedungeon.”
“twasworthit.Youdidn’tgethurt,hyung.”
“Really?henthat’sgood.”
DoYehyunstayedquietforabit,thenabruptlybroughtsothingup.
“Whileyouweregone,lookedintosothingsaboutyou.”
“Whatdidyoulookat?”
“henewswasup...people’sreactionsandstuff.thoughtmaybeitmighthelpyou.”
“Yeah?Andhowwasit?”
Well,howgoodcouldthereactionpossiblybetocleanlyrammingthecountry’snewS-rankwithacar?
Still,pretendingtobeinterested,askedDoYehyun,
“t’snotverygood.Alotofpeoplearearguingoverwhetheritwassuddenunintendedaccelerationornot,andthere’sspeculationaboutyouandunterKwontoo.aturally...thebadkind.”
“mm.”
“Doesitbotheryou?”
DoYehyun’seyesstaredstraightatwithoutwavering.lightlyansweredwhilebrushinghischeekwithmythumb.
“o.”
“figured.”
“Why,doesitbotheryou?”
suddenlybecacuriouswhatDoYehyunwasthinkingwhenhebroughtthisup.elookedcalmontheoutside,butwashecalmontheinsidetoo?
DoYehyunlookedatandslowlyblinkedthosebigeyes,thenaskedbackinavoicestrippedofpersonalwill,
“Shoulduseit?”
Withoutanswering,quietlystudiedDoYehyun’sexpressionandslowlywithdrewthehandthathadbeentouchinghischeek.venafterthat,hisgazeremainedthicklyfixedonforquiteawhile.
***
thadbeenaverylongtisincemaekyunghadfeltsothingsounusual.tseedclosetoanger,butcallingitangeroutrightdidn’tquitefit.tfeltfresh.
“aha....”
Quietlylookingatthephonethathadeitherdisconnectedorsimplyreturnednoresponse,hecalmlyrosefromhisseat.
herewasnowayithadbeensosuddenaccident.fithad,SeoJehyunwouldn’thaveactedthatcalmly.fanything,hewouldhaveexplodedinanger....
maekyungimdiatelyopenedtheofficedoorandcalledovertheemployeestandingoutside.
“CouldyoufindoutwhathappenedjustnowinvolvingunterSeoJehyun?”
“Yes.”
heanswerthatcabackatoncewascrisp,butatthesatifaintlyuncomfortable.maekyungconsideredforamontwhethertowipethesubtleinterestandquestionoutoftheemployee’seyes,thenquicklygaveuponthethought.
‘Whatamsupposedtodowiththis....’
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