Shopping malls are the ultimate places to spend money buying things you don't need, only to wonder later why you even bought them in the first place. They were also places for dates, socializing with friends, or simply strolling around to pass the ti.
In one of these places was Allen, accompanied by three girls: one with red hair, another blonde, and the last with white hair. Each of them was so beautiful that they could draw attention simply by existing.
Surprisingly, they weren't Felicia, MJ, or Gwen, but rather Lucy Heartfilia, Erza Scarlet, and Mira Strauss. That's right, Fairy Tail's trio of beautiful girls. All of them wore casual clothes suitable for the location, outfits chosen by Gwen and MJ.
What were three wizard girls doing there? They were visiting Marvel. It wasn't the first ti, and it certainly wouldn't be the last, but with all the recent changes, it felt like an entirely new world.
"Allen, look at this!" Lucy said as she rushed into a bookstore filled with countless novels she had never read before.
"Don't trip." Allen laughed as he followed her, with Erza and Mira behind him.
"I'm not Wendy..." Lucy pouted, but her attention was quickly devoured by the books.
"It Ends With Us by Colleen Hoover... hmm, it's a dramatic romance with a lot of emotional impact..."
Lucy's eyes sparkled while Allen smiled as he observed the book.
"Gwen said it was really popular. I think she even has a copy, you could ask her to lend it to you."
Lucy thought for a mont before glancing at the price. Since she wanted to buy several books, saving money on one wouldn't be a bad idea.
Allen had offered to create an entire library containing every book from his world just for Lucy. The girl had drooled for a second before reluctantly refusing, saying it would be rude to the authors, so she would pay for them herself, even if it ant suffering financially next month. Of course, since she was living in Allen's hotel, he suggested she shouldn't pay rent.
Unexpectedly, she didn't refuse, but considering the engagent ring on her finger, it made sense. Why be polite to her future husband?
"Allen, what's The Da Vinci Code?" Lucy asked while holding a book featuring the Mona Lisa on the cover...
"Hmm, it's sothing about mystery, conspiracies, and fast-paced action... I don't know if you'd like it."
"Nonsense, a true reader consus everything~" Lucy said while clutching the book and grabbing another one. "Dune?"
"Lucy, that's a saga with more than twenty books."
Lucy imdiately went pale. Knowing her love for books, if she started reading Dune, she'd force herself to buy the entire collection.
"Hey Allen-kun, what's that book about?" Mira asked from behind Allen.
When Allen turned around, he saw her holding Fifty Shades of Grey.
"That..."
Mira's smile was playful. It was obvious the girl had read the synopsis and was teasing Allen... or perhaps hinting at sothing.
"Oh!"
Erza's sudden exclamation diverted Allen's attention. The redhead was staring intensely at a book, and judging by the cover, Allen imdiately realized it was pure erotic content.
....
After leaving the bookstore, the four of them wandered through various shops. Mira stopped by clothing stores searching for new outfits she could wear in her own world. After all, the girl was a professional model.
Erza was disappointed she couldn't find a weapons and armor shop... until they actually found one. Seriously?
Allen stared at a fantasy weapon shop sohow located between a smartphone store and a lingerie shop.
Upon entering, Allen was surprised to see the sa "hero" he had t last ti. Apparently, the guy hadn't found a way back to his own world, so he had decided to open a store.
Even more surprising was that he wasn't so reincarnated or summoned hero, but a genuine hero from an actual fantasy world. Honestly, he was such a good guy that Allen had promised to help him return ho soday.
After that, Allen took the girls to the aquarium before treating them to dinner. Finally, they all returned to his ho on the outskirts, which was practically like returning to their own world since it was only one door away.
....
(The next day)
Allen's life at that mont was simple. On one hand, he had to spend ti with his girlfriends, fiancées, lovers, and friends. On the other hand, he had to keep helping others while using his power in the process to improve his control over it.
"And what exactly am I doing here?"
Allen appeared in a narrow hallway wearing casual clothes, fake glasses, and a baseball cap. He also held a box in his hands.
[Who knows]
"Hey, is it okay for this to be so random?"
[That's the point~]
Allen had left the entire matter of learning to control his power in the hands of the system, so he couldn't really complain.
[Ahem... everyone has desires, needs, problems, aspirations, dreams, right? Instead of us choosing, we'll simply intercept so of those and help fulfill them.]
"I get the concept... honestly, whatever."
Allen knocked on the apartnt door. When it opened, he was greeted by a thin middle-aged man wearing an old suit and showing early signs of baldness.
"Who are you?-"
Allen smiled as he casually walked into the apartnt without being invited.
"Congratulations, you've been chosen."
"Wait... what? Chosen for what?"
"I don't know yet, but we'll find out." Allen showed off the three-foot-wide box with a curious gleam in his eyes.
Just as Lucifer had said, his power worked independently, to the point that subconsciously he already knew what this man needed, and it had manifested itself in the contents of this box.
"Apparently, you don't recognize , which is an interesting change." Allen laughed.
Among all the changes in the world, one of the best was that with so many new races, beings, creatures, and civilizations added, many "people" had no idea who Allen was anymore, which was honestly refreshing. Especially because being an absolute bastard troll was much easier when nobody expected anything from you.
"Well, don't just stand there, sit down!" Allen said while sitting on the carpet.
"Mm..."
The man didn't know who Allen was. If it had been soone else, he probably would've called the police already, but he seed to suffer from severe depression, so instead of resisting, he simply sat down and accepted his fate.
Allen opened the box to inspect its contents, and what he found left him intrigued: a suit, ordinary but brand new, a bouquet of roses, a love letter with a heart on it, new shoes, and a toupee.
A mocking smile ford on Allen's face as he looked at the man, who was blushing furiously.
"Oh, so, my new friend Jimmy wants a cute girl?~"
"No, no, it's not like that, and my na is Tom," Jimmy blushed even harder.
"Say no more, Willy!" Allen stood up and gave a thumbs-up. "You're in luck. If there's one thing I know, it's the heart of a woman."
Willy looked at Allen with wide eyes. This eccentric invader who had entered his ho like he owned the place had an oddly convincing aura. He had no idea who this young man was, but he was certain he could solve his problems!
"It's ti to conquer." Allen snapped his fingers, and Willy's clothes changed into the suit from the box.
....
(Half an hour later)
Allen and Willy observed a flower shop from behind a bush. Inside, a middle-aged woman with short hair watered the plants.
Allen nodded as though he had already uncovered the secrets of life itself and gave the man a serious look.
"Alright, Matthew, here's the plan. Forget the bouquet. You'll look desperate, and it'd be stupid to bring roses to a florist. Just go in there, order a bouquet of roses, and when they hand it to you, I'll call your phone."
"What for?"
Allen slapped Matthew across the face.
"Don't interrupt while I'm creating art!"
"Y-Yes, sorry."
"Listen, this is your story. You had a date. She canceled at the last minute. You'll put on a lancholic expression, smile while holding the bouquet, and make sure she sees your eyes. Then you'll thank her for the flowers. If she stops you, don't tell her you got stood up. Create mystery. Just say sothing like, 'It's the sa as always,' and thank her."
Wednesday – The way you explain this in such detail makes it sound like it could actually work... this is subtle brainwashing.
Jalter – Have you no sha using such shaless tactics?!
Allen – Hm? I don't need to do this, but just look at Miguel. He's not handso, he's not strong, and he doesn't have any natural charm. If we don't do this, his only options are psychiatric hospitals, so desperate housewife, or maybe a serial killer if he wants a partner.
Anemone – You... are cruel -_-
Allen ignored the girls and looked at Tom, who hadn't reacted at all, as though his brain had short-circuited.
"A..."
[Well, if he could do that himself, he wouldn't need a miracle, right?]
Allen grabbed his own chin and began to think. It would be humiliating for a top-tier womanizer to fail this mission. This was practically his natural habitat! His hunting ground! His specialty! However, it was true that Tom was so of the worst material imaginable to work with.
It was like handing Da Vinci a piece of chalk and a flat rock, then expecting him to paint the Mona Lisa; he could do it, he would do it, and so could Allen, but it wouldn't turn out quite as perfect.
"For now, let's check the box." Allen pulled the box from his inventory. It hadn't disappeared, which ant he still had more "weapons" for this battle.
When Allen opened it, he expected to perhaps find the woman's diary, maybe a gift she would enjoy, or sothing similar, but to his surprise, it was none of that.
Inside the box were five things: a perforated ball gag, a pet collar with a leash, a short whip, lubricant, and a black leather suit... sothing a masochistic slave would wear.
Both Allen and Tom fell silent until Allen looked at him in disgust.
"So you're a degenerate!"
"That's not true!" Tom raised his hands defensively. "Not !"
"Oh, but it is you~"
Interrupting them both, the woman appeared. She smiled as she observed them, which was extrely strange considering they looked like two suspicious n holding a box full of BDSM equipnt.
Allen, being the shaless man that he was, imdiately stood up naturally and pointed at Tom with righteous indignation.
"You filthy pervert! You can't carry this stuff around in public! Luckily, I caught you!"
"Ehhh!" Tom's eyes and mouth opened wide like a fish.
Now that everything had gone completely to fuck, Allen decided to save his reputation by sacrificing Tom.
'Sorry, Tom, but I didn't sign up to let people think I'm so weird degenerate. Don't worry, I'll never forget your sacrifice.' Allen wiped away an invisible tear.
Makima – ...
Esdeath – ...
Albedo – ...
Kurumi – ...
Even demon dolls and cruel queens were left speechless by the new level of shalessness Allen had unlocked.
Tom, anwhile, wished the earth would swallow him whole, but to both their surprise, the woman, despite having several wrinkles, still retained a certain charm, crouched down while grabbing the pet's collar and leash.
"Tom, I've been wondering if you'd ever work up the courage to ask out."
"Huh?" Allen was stunned.
The dolls were shocked. Even Tom himself was completely frozen. Had he really heard that correctly? Did his muse actually know about his feelings?!
The woman knelt down and gently caressed Tom's cheek.
"Darling, every day after work, you pass by here and watch from that corner for half an hour. Of course I would notice.~"
Allen's expression instantly beca indifferent. That behavior was clearly stalker material. Any sympathy he and the girls had felt vanished imdiately. But strangely enough, not only had this woman not filed a restraining order or reported him, she actually didn't seem bothered by it at all.
Allen – She's a strange woman.
Rebecca – Says the guy who sohow ends up with a yandere or stalker in every world!
Allen – That's different; it's justified. How could they not stalk when I'm Allen Walker?
2B – Master...
Bocchi – How can you say that without feeling ashad?
Allen – Heh.
Jalter – That wasn't a complint!
The woman and Tom smiled as though everything that had just been said and done was the most normal thing in the world.
"Well, I guess everything turned out fine," Allen said as he turned around, allowing love to bloom.
But the mont he turned away, he heard the sound of a smack, and when he looked back, he saw the woman dragging Tom away... now wearing the pet collar.
"Ayu... save !"
"Co on, Tom, it's ti for you to learn how to be a good companion~"
"..."
Allen remained silent as if he couldn't see Tom desperately pleading for help, then smiled proudly and spoke without sha.
"As I said, everything worked out perfectly in the end. I'm amazing at this. But nobody expected otherwise. This is my elent, after all."
Even the system was left speechless by this shaless troll bastard.
....
"Okay, are you sure about this?" Allen opened the airplane door. He was about to skydive, fully equipped with the proper gear, but the problem was his jump partner.
Standing beside him was old Stan Lee, wearing special black glasses designed to keep them from falling off during the dive.
"You only live once!" Stan Lee shouted before leaping out of the plane.
"Wai-" Allen reached out his hand, but it was too late. Marvel's creator, who in this world was just a crazy old man, had jumped without even wearing his parachute!
"You senile old man!" Allen shouted as he jumped after him with the spare parachute.
"Yee-ha!" Stan Lee enjoyed the freefall without realizing he was about to beco history.
Fortunately, Allen had been Superman long enough to know how to eliminate wind resistance, allowing him to catch up quickly.
The old man thought Allen was playing around while trying to strap the parachute onto him, making the task far more difficult than necessary. But by the ti Allen succeeded, they were already dangerously close to the ground.
Without hesitation, Allen pulled Stan Lee's parachute.
Then, when Allen pulled his own...
Snap.
The cord broke.
"Yeah... not surprised," Allen said indifferently. Omnipotent or not, he was always surrounded by bad luck.
He slamd heavily into the ground, creating a crater. Naturally, he wasn't injured, but he was completely covered in dust and dirt.
When Stan Lee landed safely, he hurried over.
"Hey kid, you alright?"
"My body is fine, but my soul is wounded."
Stan Lee laughed.
"Co on, don't be so dramatic!"
Allen ignored the old man while staring blankly at the sky, still lying in the crater.
Stan Lee approached and lay down beside him.
"Don't feel bad. You did well. You fulfilled this old man's wish."
"True. I hope that surprise gift you promised is worth it."
"You're worse than a loan shark hahaha." Stan Lee stopped laughing, then simply smiled. "I'll tell you sothing... if I ever write again, I'll make a story about you. It'll be a manga."
"A manga? Not a comic?"
"Nope. You're much better suited for a manga. I know... it'll be called D Gray Man. What do you think?"
"..." Allen glanced sideways at Stan Lee before snorting.
"Sounds depressing... I'd prefer another title. One that doesn't sound like it'll end in tragedy."
"Co on, kid. Tragedies have their charm."
"Like Spider-Man? No thanks."
"Well then, we'll give it a happy ending."
"Don't be ridiculous." Allen stood up and snapped his fingers, instantly cleaning off all the dirt. "I'm Allen Walker. I don't need anyone to give a happy ending. I'll make one myself."
Behind his dark glasses, the old man's eyes sparkled.
"Then so it shall be!"
Both of them laughed.
Afterward, they stopped by a bar in the middle of nowhere, had a drink, and for so reason got lost in the desert, where Allen sohow encountered Captain Jack Sparrow again, who had apparently beco the god of alcohol or sothing like that...
Yeah. Just a normal day for Allen.
They were interesting monts, fun ones, but everything eventually ca to an end, and Allen began ntally preparing himself, because with each passing day, the end of his vacation drew closer.
====
A/N: The ultimate reference has just arrived 🍷🗿
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