I spent my ti getting a grocery list together. We were low on food and coffee. I still wondered which brand she bought. We had enough to get through tomorrow, at least, but for food there was just a sad handful of wilted lettuce. This was probably the best thing I could do for today. Alisha and I needed to eat, and eating out had gotten a bit tiring after a while.
With a list together, and so more investigation in her pantry, I went down to see Lili. She had sprawled herself out on the couch and was half boredly watching a drama show.
She pulled her gaze from the screen to look at .
“Whazzup?” she asked.
“Uhm… I would appreciate making a run to the grocery store,” I explained.
She sat up, getting her limbs in a more lady-like position as she did so. “Ms Takeno doesn’t have soone to take care of that?” Lili asked.
“Yes, but… I an,” I had a hard ti putting my words together in front of her, and her gaze grew increasingly impatient. “We need groceries today and she’s busy,” I managed.
Lilli rolled her eyes again. “Too busy to send a text to soone?” she grumbled, but she did get up. “As long as you drive, it's fine.”
I nodded, a little put off by this. She was muddling my expectations of her job.
She followed out to the rcai, and then eyed the sleek car admiringly. I expected her to change her mind about driving but she said nothing as we got in. I started the car and figured out how to open the garage door with the remote clipped to the visor.
The rcai was as absurdly luxurious as always. It drove so smoothly, and it was difficult to not speed since the acceleration was so gentle I didn’t notice it. I knew the area well enough now that I could get to the grocery store on my own without any trouble. Lili stayed in the passenger seat with phone in hand, scrolling on so social dia app.
When we got to the store she got out.
People were looking at the car again, making my hair stand up a bit. I’d probably never get used to this much attention being put on , especially not because of wealth.
I shouldered my purse a little more and hurried to the front entrance. Lili strolled behind, staring people down as we went. She did have so experience with watching over people at least, even if she didn't take the job as seriously as Tye and Matteo.
I got a cart for once. I wasn't planning on getting a lot but it was enough it would be hard to carry.
Once inside the store at least I felt more like I was blending in. No one had seen what kind of car I got out of and Lili strolled quite casually. I collected the items I deed were needed, and debated trying to guess the coffee brand. It was probably the most expensive one, whatever that one was, but I just had no idea. Despite how much I drank coffee, I had never been particularly picky about it and a plastic tub of cheap stuff had always been adequate. It would be better, I decided, to just ask Alisha when she got ho. And I’d be more likely to do so now that I was actively shopping for us.
I finished getting salad ingredients and yogurt and so fruit and even decided to get a couple baking items I knew were needed as well and cashed out with the Kitten Smith card. It still felt weird to use it, but I felt less bad at least since I was buying groceries for Alisha.
Lili stared boredly and tossed a candy bar onto the register belt before I paid and disinterestedly nibbled on it during the drive ho. I didn’t say anything but I certainly felt the judgent under my skin. She was taking advantage of and probably knew I wouldn’t say anything or stop her from doing whatever the hell she wanted.
She was right. I hated that I didn’t have the guts to say anything about her piss-poor attitude but I didn’t know how to handle this. I wasn’t her boss; that would be Tye or maybe Matteo.
We got back to the house and Lili went back to watching TV as I figured out where to put everything away and then started to browse online for a suitable chocolate chip cookie recipe. I wasn’t feeling anything complicated, and was craving sothing more hoy.
I took out so butter and microwaved it to get it nice and soft and then added the sugar and eggs with it in a mixing bowl, doing my best to properly combine it into the creamy texture the recipe called for. Mixing got more difficult when the flour and stuff was added, turning into a proper cookie dough that strained my arms. I let the dough rest a bit as the oven preheated and sat at the table with my phone, which Tye had returned to yesterday. Unlike Alisha’s phone, mine had nothing on it that might’ve been useful to anybody so he hadn’t disposed of it. Sophia had panicked when she couldn’t get a hold of for a few days, several texts and calls had gone unread. I wanted to make good on my promise of getting coffee with her soon so I sent her a ssage to et up later in the week, which she responded to almost imdiately.
I sighed, a little more relaxed, even as Lili’s TV show blared in the background.
I portioned the cookies, and set aside about half the batch to freeze them and the rest I slid onto the oven rack and set the tir before going back to the dining table and finally deciding to sit down with my docunts and the na change paperwork. I still debated over my last na. Alisha and I weren’t married and probably wouldn’t get engaged, at least not for a long ti, so changing my last na to Takeno wasn’t really an option. But I’d rather not be “Bauer” forever. It was better to separate myself from that part of my forr life.
For now, I settled for the first na ‘Kit.’ And then I figured out how many other personal docunts needed an official change to them. It might take a while, but soon I would no longer have that dead na. I could change the gender marker as well.
I got the cookies from the oven once the tir went off, and let them cool a bit before imdiately scalding myself on the still gooey insides. That was almost more nostalgic than not. When had I ever controlled myself around fresh chocolate chip cookies?
The fact they weren't quite the sa as my mom's was both good and bad. They wouldn’t quite scratch the itch for her baking, but they also wouldn’t pull back to that household.
I heard Lili's show pause and looked up at the sound of her footsteps.
“Are those… communal?” she asked.
I made a gesture, mouth still half full, that she was welco to them. “They hot, though,” I managed through the hot goo.
She approached, almost looking sheepish now and selected one before making a pained expression as it devolved into a hot ss in her fingers and most definitely burning her. I hurried to grab a napkin for her, which she accepted with a quiet thank you before transferring the ss from her hand to its surface.
“This is good,” she complinted as soon as she put so of it in her mouth. “I wish I had the skill to bake and stuff.”
“Do you like baking?” I asked, latching onto the common interest with little sha.
“I don’t know,” she said. “I’ve never had the opportunity.” She scooped more of the mass into her mouth. “This would be really good with so milk.”
I went to the fridge and fetched the half gallon. “Dairy milk is okay, right?” I asked.
She nodded and selected a second cookie before accepting a small mug of milk from . “Alisha doesn’t strike as a cookies and milk kind of person,” she said.
I shrugged. “I don’t know. She liked the brownies I made. I thought she might like another commoner dessert.”
“You weren’t, like, one of her higher ups?” Lili asked, genuine confusion on her face.
I blinked. Usually I was talked down to for being a commoner or an unassociated person, but if Lili didn’t know about that, maybe she wasn’t as in the loop as I expected. “I didn’t know who she was when we first t,” I explained. “But she offered help and I was desperate.”
“And then you hit it off?” she followed.
I nodded. “More or less.” It was still unclear in my brain how much of this was pure lust. There was definitely the more sappy kind of love, but how much of each was still hard to decide.
“Matteo is your brother?” I asked.
She nodded. “Half brother, really.”
“That’s nice,” I said. “I have a sister, but I don’t get along with my parents a lot so I don’t see her often.”
“Parents are douchebags," she agreed and hopped up to sit on the counter, a third cookie in hand.
I didn’t know if I should agree with her. My parents weren’t the best, but there were worse, and far better.
“Is Matteo always so…” I looked for the word.
“Like a rock wall?” she guessed.
I nodded, and finally rembered to turn off the oven now that I was done with it.
Lili didn't answer right away. “He… wasn't always that way,” she finally admitted. “It was different when we were little kids.”
I glanced at her. “You're still young,” I pointed out.
“I'm nineteen,” she snapped. “I'm not a child.”
“Well…. No.” I rembered I did a lot of growing up between being eighteen and when I turned twenty-two.
She sighed heavily. “I grew up fast. That tends to happen when you live like we do.”
I couldn’t empathize but I gave her a sympathetic look. “I know things are hard for you guys,” I told her. “But I didn't grow up in the mob. And I'm only associated because of my relationship with Alisha. There are so things I can't even imagine.”
I realized I should have kept that to myself as she gave a rather hateful look.
“So you're one of those, huh?” she grumbled.
My cluelessness must've showed since she rolled her eyes.
“You're here thinking it's all glory and gold. A way to get ahead of everyone else.” She slid off the counter then and set her milk glass aside. Her face ca just a couple inches from mine. “I hope you find what this life has to offer,” she said before tramping off back to the living room and turning her show back on.
I was frozen there, hearing the oven popping as it cooled down. Then I leaned my weight against the counter, completely unsure of how to put a bandaid on this relationship. I didn't know being forrly unassociated was such a cri.
User Comments
0 comments from readers