Irene sought warmth on days like this.
As she stood up from her bed after getting a bit more rest, she walked towards her stove. The pain in her lower back and hips was such a deep, aggressive aching that she needed to move around as if she could escape it.
She added a few more logs to the fire so it would build a bit bigger, and she wouldn't have to deal with it for a while.
Since there was water already hot, she dumped a bit into a clay cup and steeped a few leaves from her collection of Volna herbs. It would take a while for it to fully brew, so she grabbed a large, knitted blanket and fell to the floor in front of the fire. Even though she had the urge to move, she was more tired than anything.
It was warm, but she wished it were warr as she curled into a ball and tried to protect her innards, which felt like they were being thrashed out. A part of her wished she were built like a dragon and could climb into the blazing fire without facing repercussions.
As her mother had once advised, she kept stones in her fireplace for monts like these, but she didn't have the energy to move them or roll them in her wool bag, so she wouldn't be burnt. She started dozing off as she tried to summon motivation.
Seed that sleep was the answer to all of her problems for now. At least she knew Felix had the apprentices handled…
Irene dreamt of her brother annoying her whenever he wanted to play while she was in her etiquette lessons. She would be perfecting her handwriting while he would be pounding down her door after the tutor left.
He would demand to go outside, knowing their parents didn't want them out by themselves. But she would have to finish her writing or face repercussions from her mother.
"Go away!" she would shout.
But instead, those words ca as more of a soft uttering from where Irene lay on the floor with her blanket fully surrounding her.
What really woke her up, though, was the feeling of soone lifting her up, and by then she was on edge and alard.
Irene pushed at whoever dared co into her room without permission, and she had crawled backwards until her back was against her bed.
"What-What on earth?" she demanded.
She focused as she was t by the dark eyes of her Commander, having been pushed against the wall next to the stove where she had been lying. Irene was smaller than him, but a lot stronger than she looked.
"Forgive ," he quickly breathed out. "Felix told you were sick. I was knocking for a while with no answer. Can you imagine my horror when I see you here on the floor, unconscious?"
In his rush, the Commander had left her door open, and she glanced over, feeling the cool morning air as it rushed into her room.
"Please shut my door," she requested.
She didn't want to feel the cold, but more importantly, she didn't want anyone to see him bothering with her right now.
He seed to hesitate as he looked over her, but she was well enough to shoot him a sowhat stern expression, and he felt he had to listen to her or he was going to get in trouble.
There were tis in his life before when he was pushed around quite easily, but those days, it was only her.
When the door was shut and the room was coming back up in temperature, Irene nudged her knit blanket towards herself with her foot, and she covered herself with it. Now that she was calming down, she recalled just how bad she had been aching. She felt almost feverish with how bad it hurt, but she was determined not to say anything despite the way she leaned into her mattress with the back of her head.
Henry moved towards her more timidly than he normally did when interacting with her.
"Felix said you're sick," he repeated. "Shouldn't we summon Siverly? He seed to dismiss it quite easily, but I can't."
He was walking on eggshells, knowing that his protectiveness of her had been sothing she made a big show of reminding him that she didn't like. But he could tell that she wasn't like her usual self.
He sat beside her and leaned against the bed before turning towards her. He lifted his hand and moved her fiery hair from her forehead as he delicately felt the freckled skin.
"You feel warm, Irene," he continued, his voice taking on more of a pleading edge.
Trying to silently assuage him, she removed his hand from her forehead, and she leaned into his side, pressing her cheek against his firm shoulder. She wished that there was a way for him to truly help her, but the closest she had co to feeling better at tis like this was the bitter tea, certainly over-brewed by now, and the warm stones.
Irene felt embarrassed. It was even more embarrassing than when she had to confess to Felix why she needed a break every now and then. Henry looked upon her as if she had no flaws.
But if she wanted a life with him, she knew that this was bound to co out eventually. Up until then, she had trusted him with so much of herself, what was the harm of a bit more?
She couldn't look at him as she muttered, "It's my monthly bleeding. So months are worse than others. I'm not sick, Henry…"
He treated her fragilely as he lifted her and placed her on his outstretched legs. He made sure she was entirely covered by the blanket up to her neck, which seed to be her preference at that mont, before he settled his arms around her and resisted the urge to squeeze her out of the relief he felt that she wasn't sick.
"What can I do for you?" he asked. "Anything."
"My back hurts," she admitted. "It feels like I'm being stabbed, but there's nothing I can do about it except for drink tea and stay warm. But…" She finally felt brave enough to face him. "Doesn't this disgust you? I understand if it does…"
The few tis she had crossed paths with her brother while dealing with her cycle he made sure she knew he thought she was a demon from the underworld.
"I lived most of my life with a mother and aunt who complained incessantly about their monthly bleeding," he admitted. "Their cravings of red at and sothing sweet… I got used to being an errand boy during tis like that."
He had even learned that the highs and lows of Princess Marie were very much tied to whichever ti of month it was, but he wasn't going to admit that out loud when the woman he loved was in front of him.
There was only relief to be felt as she wrapped her hands around his neck and allowed herself to lt into him, but she didn't squeeze him too tightly. Even her chest was beginning to ache. It didn't feel fair.
They sat there for a few monts together as he gently rubbed her lower back, and she enjoyed the feeling of not being totally alone at a ti like that.
Eventually, Henry did bring her back to her bed, and he fetched her the tea she had started long before.
When he offered her more help, she admitted to how ravenous she felt.
Which was how she had honeyed porridge brought to her for breakfast. Even at lunch, he brought her a book to keep entertained and so sweet fruit to enjoy. He went all out for dinner as she had a cut of steak that was perfectly cooked, brought to her, as well as a bit of cake.
Even though she still ached, by the ti evening rolled in, Irene was at least satisfied with her treatnt that day. As she sent off Henry with a final goodnight kiss, she had to admit, "It will be hard not to take advantage of your helpfulness today if I go through this again."
He regarded her with raised eyebrows. "If not , then who?"
She was so taken aback by that because he was right. She blinked a few tis, but the small smile on her face told him she didn't mind it all that much.
Once alone, she felt a strange sense of yearning. The realization that this was the man she had to marry one day. How could she ever accept less than him?
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