’..Urgh.’
The mont his mind replayed the gentle, flushed expression on Ethea’s face, the absolute determination in her eyes when she called him her husband, his entire system completely glitched.
He could still vividly recall the exact weight of the silence that followed, the frantic, loud hamring of his own ribs, and the sheer terror of not knowing how to look at her without giving himself away.
’I...’
’I’m completely hopeless...’
He rested his elbows on his knees, burying his face in his hands with a quiet, defeated groan.
He stayed like that for a long ti, the cool air of the gardens brushing past him, doing absolutely nothing to put out the sudden heat flare in his face. It took a few deep, deliberate breaths to finally force his racing pulse back down to a manageable rhythm. Slowly lowering his hands, he looked back at the pond, his expression turning serious.
’...’
He couldn’t deny it anymore.
This wasn’t just the lingering awkwardness of a sudden conversation; it was a total internal shift.
Looking back, he realized he had been treating their entire living arrangent like a high-stakes tactical mission.
He also had spent the past few days constantly trying to rationalize his actions, convincing himself that his hyper-awareness was just a natural part of being a diligent protector, a good husband. He had filed every cooked al, every shared conversation, and every lingering glance under the safe, comfortable label of responsibility and duty.
’...No, this wasn’t just because of duty...’
Duty didn’t make a man’s heart hamr violently against his ribs just because their fingers accidentally brushed while adjusting a blanket. Duty didn’t cause him to ticulously police his every movent, terrified that she would catch him tracking the subtle curve of her lips whenever she smiled.
The reason was far simpler, yet infinitely more terrifying.
’Could it be...’
Staring back down at his reflection in the pond, his breath hitched.
’Could it be that I...?’
The water rippled slightly as a gentle breeze blew across the garden, blurring his features just like the chaotic emotions blurring his logic. The denial he had been clinging to for days finally crumbled under the weight of his own racing pulse.
’I... I’ve fallen for her?’
’...’
Soren fell silent.
His mind went entirely blank as he stared unblinkingly at his reflection, the chaotic rush of his previous thoughts suddenly dying out.
’I have fallen for her... fallen... fallen...’
The words continued to ring in his head like a stone dropped into still water, sending quiet tremors through everything he thought he understood about himself.
Automatically, his mind tried to scramble for a rebuttal. He desperately reached for any logical alternative, wanting to prove to himself that he was simply overcomplicating things.
Perhaps he was just wrong.
Sure, he liked her. He enjoyed her company, felt a protective instinct toward her, and genuinely cared about her well-being.
But love? Real, actual love?
That was a massive leap. It was a completely foreign concept, sothing entirely outside the scope of his reality.
He waited for his brain to find a loophole, to present a convincing counterargunt that would restore his usual pragmatism.
’...No.’
There was no loophole. There was no clever workaround or misinterpretation.
’...I.’
He closed his eyes for a brief second, and when he opened them, the truth was the only thing left.
’I’ve really fallen for her.’
’...Ha.’
A soft, helpless chuckle bubbled up in his throat, a faint sound that carried more disbelief than actual amusent.
He let out a slow breath, watching the pond’s surface gradually resettle into a clear, undisturbed mirror.
Strangely, the suffocating tightness that had been squeezing his chest completely disappeared.
In its place, a strange sense of peace and unexpected sweetness began to bloom, settling deep into his bones and making the heavy burden of his thoughts feel surprisingly manageable.
’But...’
How exactly had this even happened?
He searched his mory for a single, defining turning point, a specific mont where the line had been crossed, but he ca up entirely empty-handed.
As for that night... It was probably when he actually noticed the shift within himself, rather than the exact mont the feeling was born.
There was no love at first sight, nor so sudden, grand event that changed everything between them. It had been more gradual. The emotion had simply accumulated over ti, building up quietly through a thousand unnoticed details until it finally overflowed.
’Hmm...’
Soren rested his chin on his palm, letting his gaze drift as the tiline finally began to make sense.
He went from treating her as soone he had promised to protect and care for to soone whose opinion mattered more than anything else. He actually liked coming ho to her. He liked the quiet routine they had built, and the re idea of her looking at soone else the way she looked at him made an ugly, possessive knot tie itself in his stomach.
He wasn’t just invested in her safety or recovery anymore; he was completely invested in her.
"..."
He pressed his thumb against his temple, his features tightening again as the relief of finally being honest with himself gave way to a much trickier problem.
Admitting his own feelings to himself was one thing. But...
What about Ethea?
’...’
The question lingered in the air, bringing with it a sudden, sharp edge of uncertainty.
When she had looked him dead in the eye and promised to fulfill her role as his wife, her cheeks flushing a soft, lovely pink... had it truly been out of affection?
Or was it just an overwhelming sense of gratitude for everything he had done to protect her?
Ethea...
How did she even feel about him?
’...Hmm.’
As far as he knew, Ethea was a proud, fiercely independent figure, regardless of her current physical limitations.
He had saved her life, sheltered her, and provided a safe haven when she was at her most vulnerable.
It wouldn’t be surprising if her sudden openness was just her way of trying to repay the imnse debt she felt she owed him. She had explicitly stated she wanted to master the technique so she wouldn’t be a burden anymore after all.
’She also said to fulfill her role...’
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