Yukari decided she needed to take appropriate precautions.
She had been single for however many thousands of years — a conservative estimate, she felt. And in all that ti, her orientation had been perfectly normal, sa as any other youkai.
There was absolutely no possibility of any alternative inclinations.
She was, admittedly, quite happy to observe such things in other pretty girls.
But having it happen to herself was a completely different and frankly alarming prospect.
At minimum, she was not prepared for it.
And if she, Yukari Yakumo, were to turn out to be that way —
What sort of existence would Ran have at ho? None whatsoever. The household would be chaos.
"Yes. Going forward, anyone whose orientation seems even slightly questionable — keep them at a safe distance. No sense ending up compromised through carelessness."
She muttered this to herself, apparently having taken the Admin's Group chat revelations entirely seriously.
She had to take them seriously. The Admin's information was generally accurate. That was the problem.
She kept insisting she was canon. She had been very firm about that.
But what if — hypothetically — she wasn't?
What if she was a fan-fiction variant? Or a fan-fiction variant of a fan-fiction variant?
AAAAGH—
SAGE SCREAMING—
"Those horrible human doujin authors, running their fictional interpretations without any consideration for how the subject feels! If I ever visit the human world, I am going to drag every single one of them across their keyboards!"
Yukari fud.
From a short distance away, Ran looked up from her sweeping with an expression of increasing concern.
As Yukari's shikigami, Ran had been noticing sothing was off for a while now. Lady Yukari seed to have had so kind of cognitive event. She behaved as if she'd been hit with an intelligence-reducing curse — scattered, erratic, entirely unlike her usual self.
Ran had been debating whether to suggest a dical visit.
Lady Yukari kept insisting she was fine.
But looking at her now...
She really didn't seem fine.
Then again, patients with genuine cognitive problems rarely admitted to having them.
"...Lady Yukari?"
"Mm? What?"
"Maybe we should see a doctor. You seem like you might have sustained so kind of ntal impact. I know it's embarrassing for the Youkai Sage to need dical attention, but your wellbeing is more important."
"QUIET. My brain is perfectly functional. Are you calling an idiot? I am the YOUKAI SAGE. How could the Youkai Sage have ntal problems? Is there sothing wrong with my head?"
"...I don't think so?"
"Oh."
"..."
Yukari drifted back into a vacant stare.
Ran's mouth twitched. She really did seem like sothing was wrong.
Who were the best healers in Gensōkyō, anyway?
Ran thought about it and realized she genuinely didn't know. She and Lady Yukari had never needed dical care — being this strong had that advantage, among others. So she'd never paid attention.
Lady Yukari, naturally, had no idea what her little fox was pondering. She had already dived back into the Dinsional Chat Group.
A Youkai Sage who wasn't active in the chat was wasting her potential.
Eternally Seventeen: That topic is closed, closed, ahaha! My orientation is completely normal, the doujin authors are wrong, and I am absolutely a canon-setting individual.
Eternally Seventeen: Speaking of which — @WolfKingOfQingQingGrasslands — Wolffy, you took all those instrunts and components from the One Punch Man world's spaceship last ti. Have you actually built anything with them?
Crazy Diamond: That was possibly the most obvious topic change I have ever witnessed. Just logging that.
Kaguya-sama: Yukari-nee-san's subject-changing ability is at absolute zero.
WolfKingOfQingQingGrasslands: @EternallySventeen — from those alien instrunts and components, I have drafted blueprints for a vessel the size of a city!
WolfKingOfQingQingGrasslands: Construction is about to begin. Uncertain of the success rate, but the design is ready.
Edward Newgate: A spaceship?! Gurararara — if Wolffy-kun finishes building it, this old man will buy it from you. Na your price in sheep.
RawrSoFierce: ...The Age of Pirates is becoming the Age of Space Pirates?
RawrSoFierce: Sea pirates upgraded to cosmic pirates!
Kaguya-sama: The terrifying Whitebeard-ojii-sama has already set his sights on the stars.
Wandering Little Planet: Envious...
Ying Zheng The Sovereign: Envious 1. Once I have finished subjugating the Earth and transford Great Qin into a high-tech and high-martial-arts civilization, We too shall set out for the stars!
In the world of Qin's Moon — in a great hall that sat entirely empty — the young-faced, clean-shaven Ying Zheng sat on his throne looking as if he were contemplating grave matters of state.
Anyone who saw him would have thought: the Emperor truly carries Great Qin in his heart.
In reality, Ying Zheng was staring blankly at the Dinsional Chat Group on his internal screen.
Matters of state could wait.
Matters of state vs. chatting with the Group — he had chosen the Group without particular deliberation. He wasn't entirely certain why. Possibly because the Group left him in good spirits, whereas thinking about state matters every day would give him male-pattern baldness before he was thirty.
The image of the First Emperor of China going bald —
He refused to let himself finish that ntal image.
Ying Zheng The Sovereign: We have expanded the territory of Great Qin to cover half of Asia. Substantial developnt has also begun in the frontier regions — much of which is owed to Wolffy-dono's assistance.
Ying Zheng The Sovereign: Without Wolffy-dono's support, this pace of achievent would not have been possible. The infrastructure of Great Qin in particular has been almost entirely managed by him.
WolfKingOfQingQingGrasslands: I only sent over so construction robots. Nothing significant.
RawrSoFierce: Half of Asia. The Qin Empire covers half of Asia.
RawrSoFierce: This has been, what — a few months?
RawrSoFierce: Though actually, when you think about it, it makes sense. Wolffy's world runs on completely different physical laws, and his robots alone would be enough to roll over anything in the ancient world.
Ying Zheng The Sovereign: Indeed. A technologically-enhanced Great Qin ruling the Earth is only a matter of ti.
Crazy Diamond: Emperor-bro is incredible!!!
Wandering Little Planet: Emperor-bro is incredible!!!
"..."
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