Di Mingchen, "It’s alright, I’m used to it."
Di Mingjue, "Don’t you ever wish for soone to talk to, soone to lean on during those lonely nights? Soone to do so physical activities with? Don’t you wish for soone to bring you a cup of tea when you’re tired? To give you a massage? Don’t you wish for soone to cheer you up when you’re feeling down? Living alone is really tough!"
Di Mingchen remained silent, feeling a pang of pain in his heart. In truth, how could he not wish for those things?
But...
Although it’s a ti of peace, many soldiers still die in the line of duty.
The main reason is that An Xin’s husband died, and at that ti, An Xin seed to be in her postpartum confinent, receiving the tragic news of her husband’s death.
That heart-wrenching grief, he truly couldn’t co to terms with it.
Perhaps it left a bit of a psychological shadow, so at that mont, he wondered what it would be like if it were him.
Later, he thought if it were him, it might be better not to bring harm to others.
You hold soone’s hand, have children, and if you die in the line of duty, leaving the woman you love most and your bloodline to barely survive in the world, it’s truly more cruel than anything else.
A woman, losing her husband, leaving behind a child, is a lifelong pain for the child. Can any other man treat the child the sa way as their biological father would?
The woman you love ends up growing old alone with the child, or would she have to seek soone else?
So, it’s an issue no matter how you look at it.
Moreover, he is extrely busy, so busy that he always feels that marrying a wife but not being able to be with her often is an irresponsible act, leaving a sense of guilt towards the family.
He also sees many soldiers in the military district who, after marriage, return ho only once every year or so, and those on the border sotis don’t return for years.
So...
Though he’s a commander and slightly better off, it’s still tougher than for the average man. He feared Nangong Ran would suffer by staying with him.
Seeing him silent, Di Mingjue continued to chatter, "Second brother, you’re not young anymore, even without Nangong Ran, mom will push you to get married, to find a wife. Since you have soone you like now, why not take the plunge? Don’t tell it’s because you’re a soldier, because you’re busy, afraid of dying in the line of duty, that it’ll be too hard for soone being with you—those excuses are nonsense!"
Di Mingchen: "..."
Di Mingjue really hit the nail on the head about Di Mingchen’s thoughts.
"I do have those thoughts." Di Mingchen whispered into Di Mingjue’s ear, "Being my woman would be much tougher than being with an average man. Because I like her, I don’t want her to suffer. What kind of man lets the woman he loves suffer along with him? I would rather not bother her, I want her to have a happiness that the world can’t even contain."
"How do you know that suffering with you wouldn’t be her happiness?" Di Mingjue suddenly countered, "If a woman loves you, even the hardship would bring her joy."
Di Mingchen was silent for a mont, "It just ans our views are different."
Di Mingjue said nothing, but fell silent.
In truth, he felt a bit of heartache, a heartache for this kind of second brother.
Second brother is sowhat like eldest brother, not in a timid way, nor because he’s afraid, but perhaps because he loves so deeply.
Having a crush on soone might just be superficial, wanting to be romantic with them, wanting to talk and cling every day.
But loving soone makes you consider more, consider everything, after all, life goes on, day after day, year after year.
This kind of love made him feel rather sad too, Di Mingjue silently sighed.
He only hoped that Nangong Ran could be the one who brings happiness to Di Mingchen.
Di Mingchen thought everything through, but Nangong Ran seed carefree.
If one had to say, perhaps Nangong Ran rely liked Di Mingchen, while Di Mingchen had already fallen in love with her.
And deeply in love... not allowing a single bit of harm.
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