“Hey before we see the kids, we need to talk real quick,” I said to Laura as we entered back into the room with their escape tunnel, following behind the soldiers. I wasn’t looking forward to another climb back through it, but I hadn’t been given another choice.
She turned to with the sa angry eyes she had had so often during the final years of our marriage and then let out a protracted sigh as the anger lessened. “Dave, just because I don’t know what’s going on, I’d really rather you not treat like an idiot any more than you have in the past,” she said, causing a flashback of so of our worst fights. The guilt of it all hit hard, but I didn’t have ti for that right now.
“I don’t think you’re an idiot. I never did. I’m sorry for the past; I really am, but why do you think that I think you’re one now?” I asked. I hadn’t expected the encounter to go like this. Then again, I wasn’t sure what I had expected. Even if sowhere deep down, part of thought maybe saving her could reignite sothing, the logical part of knew that wasn’t how reality worked. Despite the fact that seeing her again had released a kaleidoscope of butterflies into my stomach, I wasn’t a kid lost in a romantic fantasy.
“You two out of the room. I want to talk to my ex-husband in private for a mont!” Laura snapped at the two n guarding the tunnel. Both of them hastily left the room without a peep of argunt. How much authority did Laura have here?
“Why do I think you’re treating like an idiot? Oh, I don’t know. Could it be the fact that you sohow look like you did when we were in college, and you didn’t even care enough to try to make an excuse?” She said, as her eyes narrowed and her glare intensified. l had nothing on her.
“Laura, co on, you know , I don’t always rember to tell people the details. The sa thing happened with the kids. This is why I wanted to talk to you before we saw them,” I said, stamring slightly. That burning stare of hers was making it hard to think straight.
“Then talk. What the hell happened to you?” she asked as she forcefully closed her eyes while taking a deep breath. She reopened them while exhaling slowly, the anger starting to fade from her face. The stare returned.
“This is going to sound insane, but I promise it’s the truth, if extrely abridged, but still the truth. When the orcs attacked, I was saved by soone who froze ti here and sent to another world. I had so adventures and learned how to fight like the orcs can, made so friends, and brought them back with . Now I’m back, and I’m trying to help,” I said, the words pouring out of my mouth as I tried to make her understand.
She lifted her glasses up with her index finger and thumb, closing her eyes as she squeezed the bridge of her nose. I knew that sign. I had seen it so many tis when I’d forget to do sothing obvious or manage to hurt myself by not paying attention. That was a sign she believed . She wasn’t happy about it, but she did.
Letting her glasses fall back into place, she finally spoke. “Dave, when there’s ti, you’re going to tell this story in its entirety. Every detail, I want it all. Every single detail will be important. Right now, I accept that you’re one of the worst liars I’ve ever t, and therefore this is all sohow true. Now, let’s go see our kids, and then I’ll let you get back to dealing with the orc issue,” she replied.
“Thank you,” I said, accepting that this was the best I could get at the mont, and started my crawl back through that miserable tunnel.
As I stuck my hand out from the other side, a strong hand grasped it and helped pull out. “Everything go okay?” Elicec asked as I stood up.
“As good as could be expected. Stay with the survivors. I’m going to bring Laura to the bus. I’ll fill you in later,” I said, turning around and offering my hand to Laura as her head appeared at the exit. She took it, letting help her out and back to her feet.
“Got it,” Elicec replied.
“Where are the kids?” She asked while scanning the crowd of people.
“Follow ,” I said, heading off toward Corey’s location following my mana flow. At first, I missed it, confused as to why the signal had led down a nearby alleyway to a large dumpster, but as I grew nearer, the dumpster beca fuzzier until suddenly, I was just looking at the bus. Was that Timon’s way of hiding it?
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The door opened as I neared. “The mallet said to let you both in. Can’t say I’d let my ex on the bus, but it’s your call,” Timon said in his usual half-joke tone.
“Dave, is that a giant Mantis?” Laura asked, surprisingly less angry than she had been back in the UN building.
“Yes, he ca back with from the other world. Co on, there are a couple of other strangers on the bus as well,” I said, motioning for her to follow as I boarded. Would she stay just as calm once I told her about the Empire of Dave? Did I have to tell her yet?
“Mom!” John shouted the second she stepped up onto the bus. The relief on his face was plain to see. The weight that had been on him was gone and in the best possible way. I was so glad I didn’t fail him again. We had found Laura alive.
“So your father wasn’t lying, not that he’s capable of it. John and Alex, I don’t have words for how relieved I am to see you both alive. Considering what little news I have of the planet, I figured you were both dead,” Laura said, her voice cracking while pushing past to first hug John and then Alex.
“How bad is it out there, Mom? We’ve been mostly cooped up in Alaska with Dad’s new friends, and I have no idea how much he’s told you yet, but it’s pretty insane there,” Alex said, wiping away tears from her face but keeping the giant smile.
“Do you want the completely honest answer?” she asked, her voice turning serious.
“Yes,” Alex and John both said.
“I don’t fully know. It’s not good. It’s not the end of the world, though, but there are a lot of people dead, and it’s going to take a while to see just how bad this is as we clean it all up. As much as I hate to say it, with your Dad and his new friends clearing out the invading forces, we can recover, but it’s going to take a lot of hard work,” Laura explained, sounding annoyed at my existence again.
“Can we not fight, please?” John asked, practically begging.
“I’m sorry; I’ll keep it civil, I promise. But I do have a question for your father. Dave, what you said to the president; what exactly did you an?” Laura asked, turning back to , so of her glare having returned to her face despite her tone remaining overly calm. I knew that declaration was going to bite in the ass eventually.
“Look, he annoyed , and I shouldn’t have said it yet. It’s only kind of true right now anyway,” I said, stamring slightly under her gaze again. How could she still do that to after so many years? What would her base stat be for sothing like presence? I pushed that thought away, as the idea of my ex-wife with class levels was too terrifying for the mont.
“Alex, John, is your father actually the emperor of sothing as ridiculously nad as the Empire of Dave?” she asked, turning back to them.
“Uh, yeah, kind of. He still has to complete three more levels of sothing. It was three, right?” John asked, looking to for help.
I sighed, shaking my head slightly before I answered. “Yeah, it was three. And just to be clear, I didn’t na it. I think the na is terrible, too. Bla that floating cloud man over there,” I said, calling out l for the first ti, who had managed to stay noticeably silent for this whole interaction.
“Ma’am,” l said, bowing his head slightly.
“What happens if you don’t succeed at whatever those are?” Laura asked, her focus returning to again.
“Most likely, soone much worse, or at least soone much more powerful than the orcs, gets control of the planet, and there won’t be anything we can do to stop them,” I said, trying to keep my voice calm.
“Got it. Alex, take this,” Laura said, pulling a cell phone from her pocket and passing it to her daughter. “With Dave handling the orcs, we’ll work to get the cell network back up as fast as possible. That’s a governnt line, so it should have priority. I wish I could co with you, but right now I’m needed here. Take care of each other, and try to keep your Dad alive,” she said this last part with a surprising smile.
“Are you sure?” John asked.
“On keeping him alive? Apparently yes, he’s needed to keep the planet around. As for being needed here? Yes. You two are safe, and now I have to work to find out just how much of our ergency services still function and what we can do to start getting help out to people. I promise I’ll be in touch, though,” she said reassuringly.
“Timon, I’m going to try to track down whoever is in charge of the orcs still here and see if we can’t get them to scatter too. Once that’s done, we can head to another location,” I said, following Laura as she left the bus.
“Dave, please just keep them safe, okay? I wish I could do it, but apparently, that’s on you now,” she said, tears now in her eyes.
“I will, I promise,” I said, hugging her.
The first thing I did once I swore my oath to the order was to turn my ho into a never-ending garden. Slowly I started by feeding everyone in my poor neighborhood, working to grow significantly. Perhaps if I hadn’t been so focused on my own ho, I would have sooner noticed what was unfolding across the Spiral.
The Last Recorded Interview with Jornlorn Rown, the last known Paladin of Agriculture
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