Marvel-ous Ninjutsu 00221. An offer to a narcissist

00221. An offer to a narcissist.

As Ezekiel was working on his tablet his phone started to ring.

‘I won't deny it, I'm a straight ridah’

‘You don't wanna fuck with .’

‘Got the police bustin' at .’

‘But they can't do nothin' to a G.’

Ezekiel pulled out his phone before he answered it as he asked, “Hey, Hela. What's going on?”

“Not much, just waiting to talk with a person of interest.”

“Yeah, we're on for later tonight… Sure I'll pick up extra snacks and drinks. But I was also thinking about getting so pizza from Joe's.”

“Sure I'll order your favorite… Yup, see you later then.”

Ezekiel hung up his phone and went back to working on his tablet before he heard a weird noise. Ezekiel glanced up to see the machine the man was connected to powering down. Ezekiel placed his tablet away as the man finally moved and lifted off the device that covered his head. As the man placed the device onto a mount he said in a dismissive tone, “That idiot Richards, telling my calculations were off.”

“Actually Reed was right and your calculations were off, but I fixed them for you along with the software you were using. I also added so mystical failsafes because when you stare into the abyss...” Ezekiel said with a hint of caution.

The man's head snapped towards Ezekiel before he asked, “Who the… Ezekiel?”

Ezekiel nodded with a smile as he said, “It seems you've heard of .”

The man nodded but frowned as he realized what Ezekiel first said and asked in an angry tone, “You ssed with my equipnt?”

“It was either that or allow you to blow up your laboratory while becoming disfigured in the process. Then you would be kicked out of school by the resulting ss.” Ezekiel said with a shrug.

“You're lying, my equations were perfect.” The man said in an arrogant tone before he moved towards his computer and started typing on it.

Ezekiel stood up and stored his chair away before he moved closer to the man as he said, “You might be brilliant, but you don't know everything. Especially when it cos to the things you're looking into with this machine.”

The man finished looking through the data on the screen before he turned around with a frown as he said, “You have no idea what I'm doing with this device.”

“So you weren't using it to look for the soul of your mother that is currently owned by…” Ezekiel glanced towards the barrier he set up before he added, “You know what, even with the barrier in place I'm not gonna ntion their na.”

The man's eyes widened and he stood up as he asked, “How do you know about that?”

“The sa way I saw the accident that would have occurred here today… I can see the future and I wanna talk to you about it. And if possible, use your help to change it.”

The man narrowed his eyes as he asked, “Of course you want my help, everyone would… But the real question is why?”

Ezekiel shook his head slightly before he said, “Man your ego is bigger than I thought… But I can still work with that.”

“I don't actually need your help, but you need mine.”

“I need help from no one.” The man said in a voice full of conviction.

Ezekiel pointed at the machine behind the man as he said, “Your pride makes you believe you don't need help, but that machine behind you proves otherwise.”

The man frowned slightly as Marcus added, “Like I said, I don't need your help. But you could definitely use mine. The question is will your pride and arrogance allow you to take it?”

Before the man could reply Ezekiel’s eye turned red and he said, “I'm gonna show you sothing and once it's done, you tell what's wrong.”

The man's eyes glazed over as he went into a genjutsu and Ezekiel let out a sigh before he pulled back out his chair. Ezekiel went back to working on his tablet for about an hour before the man ca out of his daze and looked around confused for a few monts. His eyes focused on Ezekiel as he asked, “What did you just do to ?”

Ezekiel sealed his tablet away as he asked, “Showed you different possible versions of yourself from a handful of tilines. You're familiar with multiverse theory, correct?”

The man nodded slowly before he said in a voice filled with loathing, “Richards.”

Ezekiel raised an eyebrow as he asked, “I show you versions of yourself in different tilines and the thing you take away from it is Richards?”

“He stopped them at almost every turn. Even when they succeeded, he would sohow find a way to turn things around.”

“Really? That's really what you wanna focus on?” Ezekiel asked in an exasperated tone.

“What else is there?”

“Are you gay or sothing? I'm not judging but…”

The man cut him off as he said, “Doom is not gay!”

Ezekiel shrugged as he said, “You could have fooled with how you're focusing on Richards and nothing else.”

Doom narrowed his eyes before he asked, “Then what do YOU think I should have taken away from that?”

“The fact that different versions of you like to create your own problems. If you didn't ss with Reed in the first place, he wouldn't try to stop you. Over half of your plans involved fucking with Reed in one way or another.”

“But he interfered even when the plans didn't involve him.” Doom said in an angry tone.

“Because at that point he was basically considered a hero and you were considered a bad guy. Hero's have to stop bad guys, that's just how the world works.” Ezekiel said with a shrug before he stood up and sealed his chair away.

“That's ridiculous! Richards did it to ss with .”

Ezekiel face pald as he asked, “Just how fucking big is your ego? You know Reed doesn't give a shit about you for the most part, right?”

Doom frowned as he asked, “No, he does. If not, why would that fool correct my equations in the first place if not to show up?”

“Because Reed is a fucking nerd and only cares about science. He fixed your equations because he found it challenging.” Ezekiel said before he held up a hand and added, “Reed literally only cares about pushing science past its limits. Why do you think ignores Sue, who is hopelessly in love with him?”

Doom paused for a few monts before he said, “But…”

“No buts! If you don't try to fuck with Reed, he won't try to stop you. It's simple cause and effect… But if you still possibly need to show that you're smarter than Reed for so stupid reason.” Ezekiel said which made Doom frown.

“Just wait till Reed pushes the envelope too far and causes a disaster with one of his experints, then show up and fix it for him. You could even gloat about it afterwards, and you know what he would do? He would just thank you for your help.” Ezekiel said as he shook his head.

“So that's what you wanted to learn? Don't ss with Richards and he won't get in my way?”

“No, there was a more important thing you should have noticed.”

Doom frowned for a few monts before he said, “I had my own country, trusted advisors, an adopted son… Reed getting in the way was my only real problem.”

“You were basically alone and you had no friends…” Ezekiel said in a tired voice.

“Doom doesn't need friends.”

“Everyone needs friends! And don't try to argue otherwise. I'm pretty sure if you had a friend or two to bounce ideas off of, you wouldn't have tried half of the shit I showed you.”

Ezekiel pointed at himself as he said, “And if you had a friend like , it would be easier to recover your mother's soul or take over your ho country… It wouldn't be the first ti I helped overthrow a governnt I didn't like.”

Doom's frown lessened slightly before Ezekiel pulled out a card and said, “Anyways, that's all I ca to say. If you need help with sothing or want to learn magic. Just contact with the information on the card.”

Ezekiel handed the card over to Doom before he pointed at the shimring magic barrier and added, “I'm gonna take the barrier down now, if you use that machine again without the barrier up. Whoever you look at should be able to sense you. I've installed so things that prevent tracking, but only this barrier hides your presence completely.”

Doom glanced at the barrier as Ezekiel walked next to one of the runic components and asked, “Why did you set it up in the first place?”

“Because I'd rather stay off the radar or powerful demons. I could probably fight them… But I'd rather not for now, too much of a hassle.” Ezekiel said before he deactivated the barrier and collected the pieces.

Afterwards he opened a portal and said, “It was nice eting you Victor, hopefully we can work together.”

After Ezekiel left, Victor glanced at the card for a few monts before he placed it on his desk. Afterwards he turned towards his machine to explore what exactly was changed besides the equations.

Ezekiel stepped out of a portal into his training room before he opened up a small portal that showed a busy kitchen. A handso young man with thick black hair glanced up and smiled as he asked, “What can I do for you?”

“Do you rember that special order I placed last month?”

“The ten extra large pizzas, plus your normal order?”

Ezekiel nodded before he said, “Yup, I need to reorder that one.”

“Give an hour.”

“Sounds good to . By the way, how's the new body treating you?” Ezekiel asked as he studied the man for a mont.

“Prefect. You have no idea how good it is to no longer have back pain every day… But did you need to make so young?”

Ezekiel smirked before he asked, “What wrong with being young again? Go find yourself a nice girlfriend or sothing.”

“I've already had a couple girls interested in , the problem is they are young enough to be my granddaughters!”

Ezekiel waved it off as he said, “You never married before, you don't have granddaughters.”

“That's not the point, these twenty year old girls are too young for !”

“Then go find so woman in her thirties or forties, I'm sure they would love to be picked up by a strapping young man like yourself.” Ezekiel said with a chuckle.

“That's still too young, it just doesn't seem right.”

Ezekiel shook his head slightly before he said, “Fine, I'll do you a solid and introduce you to an older lady if you're having trouble.”

“Wouldn't it be awkward if I have a younger body and she doesn't?”

“Don't worry, I know a lot of single won older than you, but still look like they are in their twenties.” Ezekiel said with a mischievous smile before he added, “Actually, I can introduce you to them tonight if you want? Do you like board gas?”

“Board gas? Sure I don't mind them.”

Ezekiel smiled as he said, “Great, in that case I'll grab you and the pizza’s in an hour and you find soone else to close the shop in the anti.”

“Fine…”

Ezekiel closed the portal before he pulled out his phone and dialed a number. After a couple monts soone picked up and Ezekiel said, “Hela, you said Sanhildr and so of the valkyries were coming right?”

“Okay, I was just checking. I'm gonna bring Joe along and I was gonna introduce him to the valkyries.”

“Yeah, the pizza guy I gave a new body to.”

“He was complaining because now young won like him and he likes won closer to his age… Yeah I figured I would introduce him to older won instead.”

“And ruin the fun? He can find that out himself, I don't plan to tell him.” Ezekiel said with an evil chuckle.

“Yup, sounds good. I'll see you soon.”

After hanging up Ezekiel called another number and after a mont he said, “Hey Sanhildr, I heard you're coming tonight… Yup, it should be fun.”

“I know you're bringing a few friends, you wouldn't happen to know if any of them are currently single, do you?”

“Oh, that's good to know… Yeah I'm bringing a friend who's single, but having issues because I gave him a younger body and doesn't want to date younger won.”

Ezekiel laughed before he said, “I thought the sa thing, we'll let him find out on his own.”

“Yup, sounds good… Sure I'll see you in a few hours and bring booze if you want. I'm bringing everything else.”

After hanging up, Ezekiel pulled out his tablet and started working on a project until it was ti to get the pizzas. Instead of opening a portal and collecting them like normal, he opened a portal and stepped through it. He found Joe talking with one of his employees before he glanced at Ezekiel and said, “Just in ti, we just finished the order.”

Ezekiel nodded and sealed away all the pizza boxes before he asked, “You ready to go?”

Joe glanced down at his dirty clothes before he said, “Let go change first.”

Ezekiel waved his hand and a mont later Joe and his clothes were completely cleaned. Joe glanced down again and his eyes widened slightly as he asked, “What was that? Is it even safe?”

“Just a simple cleaning spell, I use it all the ti on myself.”

Joe studied his clothes a few more monts before he said, “Alright, if you say so… But I'm still gonna change into sothing a little nicer. First impressions and all of that.”

Joe quickly went upstairs and changed into so comfortable dress clothes. Nothing fancy or expensive, but comfortable and stylish that showed off he knew how to dress to impress. Ezekiel nodded before he asked, “If you clean up so well, how co you never got married?”

Joe shrugged as he said, “I was poor and worked my ass off to change that. By the ti I had my business going and extra money… Well I was already old and didn't see the point in trying.”

Ezekiel chuckled and patted Joe on the shoulder as he said, “But now that you are young again you don't mind looking?”

“As long as they're mature and have a decent personality, I'll give them a shot.”

Ezekiel opened a portal as he said, “That shouldn't be hard, let's head out.”

Joe hesitated for a mont but quickly followed Ezekiel through the portal. They picked up Hela, Tao and Agatha before they took the elevator down to ground level. From there Ezekiel took Joe on a quick tour of Genosha as they made their way towards Hulk's house. Joe took everything in stride and even though they t a good amount of physically mutated people, Joe didn't bat an eye or even look at them in disgust. He just greeted them with a friendly hello, when they stopped to greet Ezekiel.

At Hulk's house he greeted the green giant without issue and once everyone else arrived he leaned next to Ezekiel and asked, “Did you give all these won a younger body like ?”

Ezekiel patted Joe on the shoulder before he said, “Sothing like that… I also checked for you, all the won who just showed up are single. So go talk to a few before we start playing gas.”