Zhang Zhentian lay in the ICU completely oblivious to what was happening outside. For her, she didn’t want to care about anything right now; he just wanted to sleep forever in his dreams, where the happiest tis he ever wanted to keep lasted. But despite racking his brains and sparing no effort, he ultimately couldn’t hold onto those best monts of his life.
Xia Jing had co to understand the feelings deep inside her husband’s heart.
If it weren’t for her choosing to hurt him in this way this ti, why would things have turned out this way?
If she had been willing to stay by his side for a while, there wouldn’t be such an ending now—it’s the most painful thing in the world when one thing truly only hurts alone.
"Zhentian, can you wake up and look at ? Don’t leave here alone.
Leaving here alone, I feel so lonely, so scared, standing here day after day, seeing you covered with the breath of life, do you know how painful that makes feel inside? It’s simply a kind of ntal torture. I never thought I’d change so much for you one day. I used to fantasize that as long as I could live in this world, why should I keep destroying the deepest parts of my heart because of you, over and over again? But in the end, I realized that I’m not a woman with a heart of steel. I too have my own feelings, and I too have my own deep palpitations!
This ti, what you did has truly enlightened . I finally understand that the past will beco the past, and no matter how I try to keep it, I won’t get the result. Since that’s the case, why shouldn’t I keep the people by my side properly?
Isn’t cherishing the person in front of you more valuable than rembering the past? If I keep thinking about what I once had, clutching at the past without letting go, then what kind of ending will I ultimately get, who can know? Now I finally understand that almost everything I’ve ever done was wrong. I always thought my ideas were right and that to everyone else, my actions were right, but I forgot that I am just an ordinary person, and what I need is just a perfect life.
Since the day we were born, the person flashing through my mind is no one else but you. You were the one who went through so many trials and tribulations with . At that mont, I finally realized that you are the most important person in my life, but I never imagined that we would end up like this in the end. That mont, I wanted to tell you that I was willing to stay by your side, to never leave you for the rest of my life.
But before I could express these words, you had already disappeared, as if cut off from this world. I could no longer find you. In my nightmare, I groped blindly, and the only one who could tightly hold my hand was you, telling not to let go over and over again in my ear, that you would definitely save —it’s such a great touch for !"
Zhang Zhentian regarded every word his wife said by his bed as unheard, because his inner world was now utterly unaware of what he should do; he didn’t know why he still wasn’t awake, and he didn’t even know that he was lying in the ICU.
In his consciousness, as long as he didn’t wake up, he could have what he most wanted, even if it were just a dream; it was better than nothing. But he would never know that the very person he wanted to hold most was standing right in front of him.
If he could see his wife in such a state, I believe he would also feel sorry.
"Zhentian, do you rember? The days and nights we spent together, do you rember how we fought against outsiders ti and again, disregarding life and death? We vowed not to live the sa life, but to die together.
Do you rember? The countless days and nights we walked through hand in hand, when I was in the most pain, it was you who stayed by my side to help ; when I was in the greatest despair, it was you who gave a warm embrace, letting walk out of the pain. When I faced dire situations ti and again, it was you who leaped into the fire to rescue —how could I possibly look away from all that?
No one understands , I’m not heartless. I don’t ignore everything, I am just not good at expressing myself, choosing to bury all the matters deep within , ready to do my utmost to repay when needed. But before I had the chance to repay you, such an event happened between us. The blow wasn’t small for you, and how could it be trivial for ?
Looking at you, my heart wrenches, a feeling no one can understand, but I believe you truly can, because when I was in the hospital, you looked at the sa way, didn’t you?"
...
Tears stread down Xia Jing’s face as she talked. When she saw all the indicators on her husband’s heart monitor flatten to a straight line, she suddenly realized sothing was terribly wrong and rushed out to call the doctor.
Zhang Yichen saw his mother running out of the ward, unaware of why, but when he heard his mother say there was an alarm inside, he realized the severity of the situation. He quickly went to the doctor’s office and got the doctor dressed to enter the ICU. Another round of frantic resuscitation began.
Xia Jing, seeing so many doctors rush in to save her husband, felt truly worried and anxious, yet she could only stand outside, unable to stand by her side, to encourage her, hoping that all he could see was the defibrillator shocking his chest, ti and again!
Half an hour later...
"Doctor, how is he?"
"Frankly, the patient’s condition isn’t optimistic. It’s best for you, as family mbers, to prepare yourselves ntally. He has developed a secondary infection due to the injuries. We don’t know why. Logically, in the germ-free environnt of the ICU, how could such a situation arise so easily? But it’s best for all of you to refrain from going in to see him. Just wait outside. Any further provocation of unnecessary danger would truly be beyond hope. We are humans, not gods. We can’t snatch soone back from Lord Yama’s grasp every ti. What he needs now is the will to carry on, and maybe once he wakes up, everything will be resolved..."
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