Finding ti to be away from my pups and away from the general chaos of everything that was happening took quite a lot of effort on its own, so because of that I was absolutely determined to ensure that those monts were able to last as long as I could make them last.
Currently I was hiding away in my closet, clutching the phoenix pendant that Anput had made for oh so long ago and using this mont to clear my head doing sothing that only ever seed to co around every so often for , and that was pray.
Praying to a Goddess that I knew was up there listening and watching, praying to not only show the devotion that I had - even if it ca at irregular intervals - but also to just have sothing clutching my mind besides thoughts about my pups and wives.
Even still I ended up praying more often than not for them rather than for myself, but it was still a sort of relaxing experience to be here, in the peaceful quiet, calmly holding onto sothing as I ’communed’ with so greater power.
It was a good way for to ’rejuvenate’ my exhausted mind and spirit, to reset myself before I had to go back downstairs and listen to Mother or Anput when they told all about how Camilla did this or Nicoletta did that.
How Astra instigated sothing or Samara goaded soone else, how they caused a unified ruckus at my prolonged absence or how they all gathered around Gabrielle and made her feel uncomfortable.
All of that was valid and all of it were things that I needed to hear, but sotis I wanted to fool myself and tell myself that I didn’t need to hear about them just yet, that there wasn’t a need for to do anything else...
The mories of how unbothered and ’ungrateful’ I had been when I had had all of this free ti to do nothing made a tad bit regretful since now I had extrely little spare ti to do what I wanted, and yet I also knew that if soone asked if I wanted to go back I would stab them in the throat before even considering it.
My pups had beco such a gigantic part of my life in such a short amount of ti, and already it felt foreign to even think about just having so prolonged ’’ ti, let alone going back to long stretches where I could do anything I wanted whenever I wanted.
That was why I cherished these stolen monts of prayer oh so often, though my prayers were always targeted towards sothing that would steal away even these precious monts because... well, to put it simply, I was praying that soti soon I would get pregnant with Jahi’s baby.
I wanted Reincantra to bless with another bout of fertility that would allow the Demoness to sow her seed inside of my womb just like Anput had, even if it ant waiting many years longer for another sign of life to sprout from my womb.
I so badly wanted to have Jahi’s baby, primarily from a place of deep, raw and devoted love for the Demoness that held my Soul alongside her own, but also because I could see how devastated she was now that the pups and Gabrielle had been born.
Seeing the three of us having children to care for was eating away at my Demoness, and even after all this ti she was such a horrific and incapable liar, telling all of us that she was fine and that it really didn’t bother her.
I could feel it and we all could see it on her face or in her eyes; it wasn’t her fault for feeling bitter about this, and she did a wonderful job letting her positive emotions win out for a majority of the ti she spent with us, but during those seldom few monts of quiet...
It was as plain as day that she was feeling bitter and depressed, and no number of platitudes or sexual acts brought her any true comfort from what she was feeling... so I prayed to Reincantra to help with this single ’problem’ I had.
Perhaps she was truly listening, because as I was mid murmur pleading with my Goddess to grant Jahi’s wish, the Demoness pushed the door open and stepped inside, looking down at curiously as she quietly asked "Did I interrupt..?"
Opening my eyes and turning to look at her, I chuckled and shook my head even as I kept my hands clasped, sothing she noticed as she swept her athyst eyes over like she always did; tilting her head and mulling on it for a mont, she eventually just shrugged and crouched beside , looking over again and smiling as she gently caressed my cheek.
"What were you praying for?"
I leaned into her touch and held her gaze for a few seconds, wondering if I should say it or not before just going with what my heart was telling ; taking a breath and letting my gaze drop to her lips for a mont, I murmured "I was praying for us."
"Us?"
Her confusion lasted for barely a second before a grin slid across her face, slowly reaching her eyes as she got onto a knee and shifted behind , pulling into her grasp and burying her face into my neck as she asked "Was it for us or for sothing created by us..?"
My hum just made her chuckle as she nodded a few tis, kissing my neck tenderly before she gently pushed forwards, where I let her roll onto my back so that she could pin to the ground and stare at as she started to peel off my clothes one by one.
When we were both bare she trailed her lips over every available inch that she wished to claim, even when she used another part of herself to claim like she always had; it was a slow, gentle claiming that took Goddess knows how long, but by the ti we were finished both of us were feeling rejuvenated...
And both of us missed how the phoenix glittered for a brief mont before the fading back into its usual state.
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