SERAPHINA’S POV
I sucked in a breath as I was pulled sharply to the side, into a narrow, shadowed walkway just out of sight.
A hard, warm chest pressed against mine, rising and falling with restrained intensity. I didn’t need to look up to know whose arms were caging against the wall.
The bond flared, loud and unfiltered, and every emotion hit at once—possession, fear, longing, frustration, desperation.
Kieran.
His scent washed over , suffocating in its familiarity. I pressed my palms to his chest—not to pull him closer, but to keep space between us.
His heart pounded so fiercely, it felt like it wanted to tattoo itself on my palm.
“Kieran,” I hissed, voice low so the passing partygoers wouldn’t hear. “What the fuck are you doing?”
His jaw flexed. He didn’t budge.
“Trying,” he said, voice rough, “to stop losing my mind.”
I blinked, startled by how quickly the atmosphere shifted from confrontation to raw vulnerability.
He blew out a shaky breath through his nose, eyes dark and desperate. “I know I told you I would give you ti. Fuck, I told myself I’d give you ti. I told myself I could handle you pulling away from . But Sera—”
He leaned closer, the bond flaring so violently my heart lurched. “Every ti I look at you, and you look away, it feels like being gutted.”
His words were raw enough to sting.
“I’m trying to restrain myself,” he said, voice cracking. “But this bond—” His hand curled against the wall beside my head, knuckles white. “It keeps reminding of how much I want you. How much I need you. And it drives crazy that you keep pretending you feel nothing.”
His voice dropped to a hoarse whisper. “How can you be so cruel?”
Just like that, the heat in my blood chilled to ice.
Cruel.
That word was like a slap made of mory.
For a mont, I couldn’t breathe. Not because of his body, or the wall, or the bond—but because of the. Sheer. Fucking. Audacity.
I shoved Kieran. Hard.
He staggered back a step, shock flickering across his features.
“Cruel?” My voice trembled with rage. “You’re calling cruel?”
His brows pinched, and he had the fucking nerve to look confused. “Sera—”
“No.” The word cut out of like a blade. “You do not get to say that bullshit to .”
Heat surged to my face, hands shaking as I stabbed a finger at his chest.
“Do you even rember our marriage?” I demanded.
His lips parted slightly, jaw tensing.
I stepped forward. A red haze crept in at the edge of my vision. “Do you rember brushing past in the corridors like I was furniture? Do you rember ignoring like I was an alarm you could snooze? Do you rember treating like I was an obligation, a hindrance, a mistake you had to endure?”
Kieran flinched, the color draining from his face.
“You want to talk about cruelty?” My laugh was sharp and humorless. “Let’s talk about how every ti we slept together, you saw Celeste. Rember when you told that? Rember when you said I never mattered? When you accused of trapping you?”
His eyes shut tight. Pain flashed across his face.
“That,” I whispered, voice splintering, “was cruelty.”
Silence flooded the walkway, thick enough to choke on.
The bond churned beneath my skin, stirring grief and longing with a fierce rawness that made feel like I was being skinned alive.
Kieran opened his eyes slowly, guilt etched into every line of his face.
“Sera...” His voice was barely more than breath. “I was blind. I was so angry, and broken, and you were there and I—” His throat worked. “I hurt you because it was easier than blaming myself.”
It would’ve been easier if he’d yelled.
Instead, he spoke softly and reverently, like soone handling sothing they’re afraid to break.
“I know I failed you,” he whispered. “I know I made you feel unwanted. I know I ruined what we could have had.”
His voice broke. “And now I finally feel everything I should have felt back then. I want to make it right. I want to—”
“Make forget?” I cut in.
He reeled back as if I’d struck him.
“That...that’s not what I ant.”
“But that’s what you’re asking.” I wrapped my arms around myself to stop the tremors running up and down my spine. “You said you weren’t trying to erase the past, but that’s exactly what you want. You want to pretend the last ten years never happened. Like that version of us never existed. That the mate bond magically fixes everything.”
He swallowed hard, but didn’t deny it.
I stepped back, putting distance between us, even though it ripped sothing inside to do it.
My back t the cold cent of the wall behind , and it took all my willpower not to sag against it.
“Go on then,” I said softly. “Make forget. Erase all the pain of those years from my mind—from my fucking heart.”
His jaw ticked, helplessness and sorrow swirling in the dark depths of his eyes.
“Unless you can do that, Kieran. Unless you can actually, really, wipe the slate clean—give fucking amnesia.” I shook my head, the words trembling out of . “You can’t ask to stand here and pretend the bond is enough.”
His gaze dropped to the ground, shoulders bowing as if sothing heavy had been dropped on him.
“I don’t want you to pretend.” His voice was hoarse. “I just... Fuck, Sera, I don’t know how to live with what I did, knowing it cost you. I want to fix it. I’m going out of my mind trying to figure out how to fix it.”
Sothing inside splintered, the rawness of his guilt breaking through my defenses.
For a mont, I saw the man beneath the Alpha. The man who was terrified he had already destroyed the future fate intended for him.
He reached for my hand, slow and hesitant. Not forceful. Not demanding. Just longing.
“Please,” he whispered. “Let try to make ands.”
I pulled my hand back before he could touch .
His fingers hung in the air, empty.
The pain that crashed across his face hit like a wave. I felt it through the bond—piercing, debilitating agony.
Fuck, I couldn’t do this right now.
“Kieran,” I said, voice low, “not today.”
He stared at , confused and wounded. “Why not?”
“Because this is Daniel’s day.” I forced my voice steady. “And I won’t let our ss ruin it.”
His breath stuttered, jaw tightening. “I’m not trying to ruin anything.”
“No,” I whispered. “But you will if you push this now.”
Over his shoulder, I spotted Maya and Ethan, their arms laden with presents, and a small breath whooshed out of . “I have to go.”
I stepped past Kieran. His body tensed, instinctively wanting to follow, to pull, to fix—but he stayed rooted in place.
I walked away before the bond could drag back. Before his scent could cloud my judgent.
Before the part of desperately aching for him won.
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