Even though he could no longer rember much of the nightmare he had just had, Lucen could still sohow hear the sound of screaming.
He stood in his personal training ground, sword in hand, the cold morning air biting at his skin. Swing after swing, he practiced in silence, trying to cut down the lingering fear.
His overall stats were already beyond those of a Second Mantle Aura user. And yet, he still had no mantle. He hadn’t even unlocked the Swordsmanship skill.
’It’s just a nightmare! A nightmare that can never be!’
He slashed at the air again, this ti with more force. His stance had grown firr, his movents sharper.
’Ironhold’s already stronger than it ever was in the ga,’ he thought, grit sharpening his focus.
’If that’s not enough...’ Lucen tightened his grip on the hilt. ’Then I’ll just increase the firepower. I’ll make it strong enough that it would blow away everything!’
Lucen lunged forward, thrusting the blade with everything he had.
’I’ll create sothing with enough firepower to blow away my enemies. The monsters. The fear. The despair. Everything! I’ll forge a firepower so overwhelming... It will tear fate itself apart!’
He concentrated all of his aura into his sword, but as expected, it didn’t form properly. He instead poured all of his strength into a downward slash. His sword cleaved through the air and pounded the ground, making it crack, but his sword, which was not enveloped in aura, was unable to endure and broke.
"A sword swung in anger is not fit for a Thornehart, young master."
Lucen spun around, startled.
Vahn stood at the edge of the training ground. Hands clasped behind his back, posture straight as ever. A faint breeze rustled the hem of his coat. His tone held no judgnt. Only patience.
"What troubles you, young master?" The old forr knight turned butler asked with a kind smile on his face.
Lucen didn’t answer imdiately. He stared at the old butler for several seconds. His hands clenched around the broken hilt, knuckles white, shoulders trembling, not from exertion, but from sothing deeper. Sothing he couldn’t na. He lowered the ruined blade.
"Vahn... Can you tell how I can stop being weak?"
Vahn walked forward, silent until he stood a few paces from Lucen. He looked down at the cracked earth where the sword had struck. Then, to the blade, snapped at its core. Finally, his eyes returned to the boy before him, not as a servant to a noble, but as a warrior to another.
"Who said that you are weak?"
"Aren’t I? Even now, no matter how hard I try, I cannot even form my first mantle. My swordsmanship has barely improved, and my improvent in other areas has slowed down."
"Hmph, how arrogant of you to call yourself weak. How arrogant of you to act as if your growth has stalled. You speak as if everyone else can do what you do. You speak as if gaining a first mantle is as simple as swinging a sword every day... Why are you in such a hurry?"
The old forr knight looked directly into Lucen’s eyes. Lucen did not respond imdiately, and after a period of silence, spoke.
"... That isn’t it at all... I’m scared, Vahn... I’m frightened that my weakness will deprive of everything I have. I’m horrified by the thought that my weakness will result in despair, for not just but everyone around ..."
Lucen gripped the broken sword’s hilt even more tightly than before. He paused as a weak, pathetic-looking smile appeared on his face.
"Do you know that every ti I went into battle, I hesitated to kill? Even though the other party was trying to kill , I always needed to convince myself that it was either them or ... How can I be anything but weak..."
Lucen’s voice cracked as the words left his mouth, barely more than a whisper as he lowered his head.
Vahn’s voice was calm, not soft, but steady, like the grind of a whetstone on steel.
"Kindness isn’t a weakness. Understanding the weight of one’s own responsibilities isn’t a weakness... And fear..." He took a slow breath. "Fear is not sothing to be ashad of... Do you think I do not have fear in my heart? Do you think that your Father, our lord, the Iron Duke, doesn’t have fear in his heart?"
When Lucen heard Vahn’s question, he could not respond. Seeing Lucen’s reaction, a gentle smile appeared on Vahn’s face.
"Everyone has fears. That is part of being human. When I was younger and was an active knight, what I feared was failing to live up to my lord’s expectations. I feared that I would die without honor and dignity as a knight."
Vahn paused as mories of the past ca back to him.
"I used that fear to better myself, and I learned that as long as I follow my heart, and live every mont with honor and dignity, as my clothes, I would always be a knight and will die as one as well."
Lucen lifted his head and looked at Vahn, who seed to be shining in his eyes right now. The person who was looking wasn’t the gar with mories of a past life, but the young boy Lucen Thornehart.
"... Do you think... Father, too, has such fears?"
"I have served the Thornehart family since your grandfather’s Valkor Thornehart’s ti. I have known your father since he was but a child..."
Vahn looked behind him for a second and continued speaking.
"A Thornehart’s body and mind might be forged from fire and steel, but even then, they are human, the sa as you and I. They had doubts, they had fears, but that is just part of growing up. But like them, a sword needs not only to be durable and sharp, it also needs to be flexible."
"So my Father had fears of his own... So were you and he able to overco your fears?" Lucen asked.
"For soone as smart as you, it seems that you don’t know how to listen. You make it sound like fear is an obstacle and you need to overco it." Vanh shook his head as he looked at his calloused hands.
"Fear is not an obstacle. It is a teacher, one whose lessons guide us to beco stronger than we were before. I need not overco fear, as it is a part of . It is what makes us human. It’s what makes us learn from our mistakes so that we might not repeat them. I have learned to accept my fears, I have embraced them so that I may grow, and continue to do so."
"Is that so..."
Talking to Vahn made the pain and fear lessen, and enough that he could appreciate how Vahn was sounding like one of those wise old ntors in gas and ani.
"...Then what should I do with all this fear, Vahn? Just carry it? Wrap it in steel and call it courage?"
"You still don’t understand, do you? Carry it? You still talk as if Fear is a burden. There is no need to wrap fear in steel and call it courage. All you need to do is walk forward with it, not let it get ahead of you or stay behind. Let it walk beside you and allow it to whisper in your ears as advice, but never let it command you."
He looked down at Lucen’s calloused hands that were no longer gripping the broken sword tightly as before.
"It’s not aura, mana, weapons, or the ability to fight that makes you strong, young master. It’s the will to stand even when your knees shake. It’s the will to keep moving forward even when you’re not sure what’s to co. To never back down, even when you wish to run. That is what makes you strong."
Vahn then got two training swords from the weapons rack nearby and tossed one towards Lucen.
Lucen let go of the broken sword in his hand and caught the training sword that was dulled for practice.
"How about a little spar, young master. This ti, don’t let your fear guide your movents, but instead, accept it and move forward."
The nightmare Lucen had was no longer in his mind, as he stared at the sword in his hand, he took a fighting stance.
"Very well... Let’s spar."
***
After Lucen and Vahn were finished sparring, he thanked Vahn and left the training grounds to go and have a discussion with Robert on how to increase the power of the arquebuses.
Once Lucen was no longer in sight, Vahn turned around and did a knight’s salute to a nearby pillar.
"My lord, I know it is not my place, but shouldn’t it have been you who talked to the young master?"
Vardon stepped out of the shadows and responded.
"I may be his father... but I’ve only just started learning how to be one." He paused, eyes fixed on where Lucen had gone. "And besides... My experience pales in comparison to the Valiant Vahn Vaern."
"You praise too much, my lord."
Vardon shifted his gaze to the bowing Vahn and nodded his head. "I an every word of it." After saying those words, he left the training ground.
Vahn, who was left in the training ground, sighed.
"As expected of Thorneharts, always so awkward." Vahn could not help but rember the Old Duke Valkor Thornehart.
"I just hope these old bones of mine can see what kind of story you’ll be writing... Young master."
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