"A mass… what?" Darvik asked, as the smile faded from his face, and well, he noticed it too, that sothing was up… because Jas was just too silent, too intact while he just said what happened to Finn and overall in the family.
Not just that, but Mike's face and even Arine seed like they already knew that shit was going down. They looked a bit pale, like they just saw a ghost or sothing.
"I take the deal, Darvik." He looked at him. "I take the deal and we can beco partners, but you said you know about everything, yeah?" Jas looked deep into his eyes, and it was just excitent… that's what Darvik felt.
The excitent of those eyes, the deepness of it, the aning behind it.
"Exactly. I know one or two things." He smiled. "What do you want to know, Jas? What is it?"
Yeah, those eyes of stillness, and sothing in it that fire, that spark of it to rage, to burn down everything in front of him, to be ready to cause sothing so big that is just irreversible… but… all Darvik thought about, the recklessness, the danger, the threats, the chaos, went away as Jas eyes that darkness… just changed.
Changed to a careful, to a warm look, with a gentle faint smile on his face, a smile that you don't want to see, the smile of the acceptance of sothing… maybe acceptance of himself, acceptance of who he is.
But the question that ca from it was not what Darvik expected… a questions and all his excitent went away.
"Say, Darvik… can I live to be thirty?"
A simple question, yet so complicated… even though there was a straight and simple answer to it… but saying it out loud felt wrong.
Darvik experienced many things throughout his life. He started his adventure into the darkness at the sa ti as Lucian. He knows many things better than anyone else in their world, about the police, corruption, politics, about human behavior… but he had never seen or experienced anything like this right in front of him.
This fucking boy in front of him, a boy who beca a man too early in his life, a boy who created a whole different era in his country, sobody who held and still holds his country in chokehold, even the fucking governnt… soone who only is born once in the century, like the great generals of the ancient tis.
Yeah, in front of him sits a man, who in four years beca a force… unbelievable thing to achieve. To beco this sobody who fucking bends the reality of what a family is capable of doing… his whole existence is an anomaly and what's more anomalous is he achieved this so young.
And just like in the ancient tis, just like in the era of great generals,great emperors, kings, and rulers… all of them died young. They thought they were strong, that they could rule forever. But ti does not care for power. Wars they fought, treasures they took, crowns they wore… all were gone in the end.
But at the sa ti, Darvik knew why Jas asked the questions. He asked because of the ntal struggles, the voices in his head, the despair, the suffering, everything. Yeah, it just shows that he's still human, that he still clings to the skin he wears. The skin that wants to be human, wants to be a civilian, wants to be loved and to love. Yeah, he still hasn't turned into that monster, the monster everybody turned into. Just like Lucian did. Just like those dozen Darvik could think about.
All of them failed. All of them died. Maybe at the height of their careers, or maybe on the road there. All of them beca shells of what they were. No emotion left, no remorse, not even a bit. They did everything not to satisfy themselves, not to achieve sothing, not to reach for the stars, not to put their na on the map, not to show it was possible.
No… they did it because there was nothing left to do.
They lost themself in the process, they lost the aning of all of it.
Darvik knew the path was cruel. He knew that most who walked it ended as hollow shells, lost to the world and to themselves… but Jas refused. He refused to let the pain carve him into sothing unrecognizable.. and maybe, just maybe, that was the only victory left, to remain human when everything else had fallen away.
Because surviving wasn't about glory, it wasn't about power or fa.
It was about keeping the last spark alive… that tiny, fragile spark called being alive and being human.
So Darvik decided to answer his question in a human way.
"Nobody is eternal in the world, Jas. Nobody. So die young, so die old, because of illness, because of cris, because of accidents, and so on." He looked into his eye, that eye that was so different… eyes that wanted to hear answers and then decide what to do. "I lived to be old even though my life was the aning of suffering. I saw my whole family burn to death, I saw it all and lived to be old… but you Jas, no, I think you will die young and you, why?"
That sa faint smile again, and his voice was low as he asked the question. "Why?"
"Because that is your fate, the fate of sobody who achieved greatness on a whole other level, sobody who topped the underworld, sobody who is an emperor of it. Don Bellini, a na that will be whispered all over the continent, a na that would be carved into history, a na that will be the glory of achievent. So yeah, Jas, you will die young." He slowly stood up, looking down at him, still in his eyes. "But." He smiled. "…life is a big trick, Jas. You pulled that trigger and the gun jamd, you got shot up like a fucking doll and lived, you got tortured, you fought with demons in your head and still do… life tricked you, or more like you tricked death." Silence as he said it, because he did it perfectly, described perfectly what the situation was "Oh, and please, Jas, do not try to kill yourself once again. Maybe life would trick you." He laughed and walked off, and it was surreal, as his laugh echoed through the whole hallway while they were just sitting in silence.
In silence, for Mike and Arine, it was heavy, sufficient almost, as Jas just still smiled, as he understood what Darvik just said.
"Life's a trick, huh," he muttered to himself. "…I love tricks." He pulled out the coin from his pocket and flipped it fast and sudden. "Heads."
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