Seduction? Where the hell did that co from?
I stared at Cha Sahyeon, his face flushed red in embarrassnt, feeling utterly dumbfounded.
...Hah.
Don’t tell ... he’s doing this because of the advice I gave earlier?
Seriously—what’s the point of having mories from a previous tiline when he’s this clueless and naive?
Seeing how completely he misunderstood left exhausted. I pushed his body away.
“Hey. That’s not what I ant by seduction—”
“I know.”
“If you know, then why the hell are you doing this? Move.”
“Just listen to , hyung.”
Cha Sahyeon grabbed my arm even tighter and began speaking with a gloomy expression.
“I know you’re confused and have a lot of questions right now. It’s not like I avoided you on purpose. If you’d sat down and asked what you wanted to know... anything I knew, I would've told you.”
The eyes beneath his long lashes were laced with determination. He wasn’t just saying this to make feel better—it wasn’t a lie.
“I just didn’t know where to start. I’ve lived through countless repetitions of ti, and my mories are all jumbled. Even now, I haven’t rembered everything.”
“......”
“But if it’s sothing I can explain—like this ti, when I found the source of that energy—I’ll tell you. So don’t worry, hyung...”
“Why?”
“Huh?”
“Why are you doing all this for ?”
Even I could hear the flat, emotionless tone in my voice.
Apparently, Cha Sahyeon hadn’t expected that kind of question. He looked flustered for a mont, then stamred:
“Isn’t it obvious? Because it’s you, hyung. Not anyone else.”
“What makes different from anyone else?”
“There’s a huge difference. How could you be the sa as those other bastards?”
“Hmm.”
Watching Cha Sahyeon believe so firmly and unquestioningly that I was special made smile faintly.
God, he’s really so naive.
I looked at him with a twisted expression, like I’d just swallowed bitter dicine.
“Kid. I must look really kind and amazing to you, huh? But I’m really not.”
“......”
“When we first t, any adult with a proper conscience would’ve rescued you. You were just a kid, captured by lunatics and subjected to human experintation. Of course I had to save you.”
“Hyung.”
“If you’d been rescued by soone more normal than ... You wouldn’t be bouncing between hotels, or stuck in a shell of a guild following into dungeons. You wouldn’t have had to guard the office alone every night when I went out.”
As I explained it out loud, I realized it really would’ve been better that way.
It wasn’t so impossible fantasy. After all, hadn’t I myself been saved by Ryu Sunghyun?
Back when I took his hand and joined Circle Guild—that was the most peaceful and happiest ti of my life.
“Soone else might’ve cooked for you, bought you clothes and toys. Maybe even sent you to school if that’s what you wanted.”
“......”
“I’m not special. In fact, I wasn’t enough in a lot of ways.”
I suddenly wondered how the future might’ve changed if I had sent Cha Sahyeon to Ryu Sunghyun instead. Not that the system would’ve allowed it.
“If you get it, then don’t ever try sothing like that again. I don’t want to kiss you.”
“...Why?”
This ti, Cha Sahyeon was the one asking.
I tried to stay calm, but the speed of his response honestly left a little stunned.
So he really was trying to kiss ...
If I hadn’t dodged, I might’ve been making out with Cha Sahyeon right now. The thought alone sent chills crawling up my spine.
What the hell. Even if he had recovered his mories and his ntal age was that of an adult, the body I saw every day was still that of a child—how could I even begin to feel like kissing him?
“I just explained. I’m not special. And whatever feelings you have for ... they don’t an much.”
Whether it was desire at the core, or so twisted attachnt to gain my attention—I didn’t care.
“If soone else had saved you instead of , you’d be chasing after that person the sa way. How aningful could those feelings really be?”
I forcibly pried his hand off my arm. Cha Sahyeon, who had been clinging to the whole ti we talked, finally let go.
Since he stepped back so obediently, I figured he must’ve accepted what I said and turned around.
“Let’s stop here and go. If we hang around too long—”
“Hyung. How many tis do you think I’ve lived the sa life over and over?”
His abrupt words brought my steps to a halt. When I turned back, he was still standing in the sa spot, tilting his head with a blank expression.
“I don’t even really know myself. It was always so mind-numbingly boring and repetitive. What’s the point of counting anymore? But it must’ve been at least several hundred tis.”
“......”
“And in all those hundreds of lives, you’re the only one who ever took out of that lab.”
My fingertips trembled. A sharp pain scraped across my chest, the kind I couldn’t quite na.
“You were the only one who bought food I’d never seen before... who let wash in warm water... who dressed in clean clothes.”
“That’s just—!”
“You think if soone else had taken , they would’ve treated better?”
His cold, expressionless face twisted into sothing ugly. A naked, bitter sneer.
“You’re weirdly innocent in the strangest ways, hyung.”
“What?”
“You know now that I’ve been repeating the sa life hundreds of tis. So you should be able to guess.”
His glass-like green eyes glead coldly.
“You really think all those lives... were exactly the sa?”
“......!”
“Normally, when people attack the lab, I get smuggled out the back and taken to a second research facility. The experints continue there, and I grow stronger. But very rarely, that future gets disrupted.”
As if pulling dusty mories from the past, Cha Sahyeon’s gaze drifted into empty space.
“There was one guy who let go of my hand the mont he got a scout offer at the lab entrance. There was a woman who acted like she’d do ✪ Nоvеlіgһt ✪ (Official version) anything for —until she realized I had nothing. Then she ditched .”
“Wait—hold on—”
“Another guy took one look at and said I’d sell for a good price—”
“Stop.”
The more I heard, the more my head ached. I pressed my palm to my forehead and let out a sigh.
“Okay, yeah... You’re right. There are a lot of crazy bastards in the world, and not all adults are sane. But what I was saying—”
“It’s not about sanity, hyung. I’m the problem.”
“Don’t say shit like that.”
I clenched my jaw before I even realized it, reacting instinctively to his certainty.
“You were just a normal kid. The ones who did that shit to you are the real monsters. How the hell could you be the problem—?”
“Because I had power.”
The words caught in my throat. I blinked blankly as Cha Sahyeon gave a faint smile.
“I must’ve been unsettling. I triggered fear that was ingrained instinctively. Like prey in front of a predator.”
“......”
“Even other kids wouldn’t have liked . Adults would’ve found it even harder to deal with. They’d feel disturbed by themselves—by the fact that they were afraid of a child who looked weak.”
Cha Sahyeon began to walk. His black robe fluttered as he stepped forward and stood before .
“You said it yourself. If soone else had taken , I wouldn’t be moving from hotel to hotel, going into dungeons, or guarding the office alone at night.”
His voice was calm and composed as he spoke.
“You were living out of hotels because you had nowhere else to go, but you still didn’t abandon .”
“......”
“I probably annoyed you by begging to be taken into the dungeon... but you didn’t ignore .”
“......”
“And the night I cried after waiting for you to co ho... you didn’t get annoyed. You just held .”
Cha Sahyeon reached for my hand. This ti it was a gentle touch—so much lighter than when he’d grabbed my arm. But for so reason, I couldn’t bring myself to shake him off.
“You were the only one who ever pulled out of that place.”
“......”
“Only you.”
Cha Sahyeon bowed his head, still holding my hand. Soft lips brushed the back of it.
Just like when he kissed my cheek, he placed a quiet kiss on my hand—then on my palm, more deeply. Then he moved my hand to his cheek.
Like an animal nuzzling into a human’s hand, he rubbed his cheek against my palm and t my eyes.
A gaze, a face, a posture that said he would do anything I asked. Complete obedience.
Seeing it—it felt like sothing was closing around my throat.
...I never wanted this kind of gratitude.
I tried to keep my brow from furrowing as I stared at Cha Sahyeon.
But if... just maybe...
Even though I knew it was pointless, the thought wouldn’t leave my mind.
If I could use these feelings of Cha Sahyeon’s... And stop the progression of the Seed...
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