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Now reading: Chapter 34: My Denial Be Working Overtime from Roommates With Benefits [BL], a Yaoi novel by bbookwormz.

•⋅⊰∙∘☾✶☽∘∙⊱⋅•✾•⋅⊰∙∘☾✶☽∘∙⊱⋅•

"You should go ho," he said. "You look tired."

I stared at him. "What? Like you’re the boss of ?"

He looked at with the certainty of soone who had made a decision and wasn’t asking for my input. That seed to be the full answer.

At that mont, Joey materialized from sowhere in the crowd, drink in hand, beaming like he’d just discovered gold.

"There you are!" he exclaid, as if he were delivering a monologue he’d rehearsed for ages. "I’ve been looking for the newlyweds."

"Joey," I said.

"No, seriously." He grinned like he was born to be mischievous. "Should I start planning sothing? Because whatever went down in that closet clearly—"

"Complete that sentence," I warned, "and I will end you."

Joey’s expression was serene, as if he knew he was safe and relishing the mont. "By the way, you look insane. Totally unhinged. Good look for you."

"Thank you. Goodnight."

"I’m just saying, the tension has been obvious for weeks—"

"Not another word," I shot back.

anwhile, Damien had already left us alone with the implacability of soone who had made their mind up and was heading out, hands in his pockets, effortlessly navigating through the crowd.

The audacity. The utter, breathtaking audacity of this guy to just kiss out of nowhere! Then tell to go ho afterwards like he knew what was best for !

And sohow I ended up going back to the dorm.

Mostly because the alternative was to stay in this room with everyone staring at , and my nerves had already lodged a formal request for fresh air and no witnesses.

Joey walked beside as we left, practically buzzing with everything he wasn’t saying, which was in many ways worse than the things he had said.

"So," he started as soon as we stepped outside into the cool night air. "How was it?"

I didn’t say a word.

"Did you really kiss?"

Still nothing.

"Oh my God, you definitely kissed." He paused dramatically. "Was there—"

"If you finish that sentence," I said flatly, "I will walk into oncoming traffic."

"I’m just asking—"

"Joey."

"As your best friend—"

"Joey."

"Who cares about your emotional wellbeing—"

"I will leave you here."

He erupted into laughter, the kind that made him grab my shoulder for support, and I trudged forward, resigned to my situation.

I climbed into Joey’s car feeling like my soul had been left behind sowhere around the second minute in the closet, still stuck there, probably on soone’s old coat.

The ride back was a special kind of torture. Joey, bless him, eventually cald down after I threatened him a few more tis, which brought an uneasy silence. But then my mind took that as an opportunity to replay the events in excruciating detail.

The grip on my waist. Strong and assertive, no hesitation, the wall against my back, the heat of him leaning in, the kiss, going from urgent to slower and more passionate, which only added to my overall agony, the sound of his uneven breath when he pulled back.

I squeezed my eyes shut, staring out the window instead.

Nope! I wasn’t doing this.

I had kissed a guy. More specifically, I had kissed Damien Lockwood, who set out seventeen rules against emotional connection and had sohow decided that those rules didn’t matter in a frat house closet.

And the worst part, the part that would probably lead to a week of therapy...was that I had kissed him back. With enthusiasm, no intention of stopping whatsoever.

I had never looked at a guy and thought, yes, I would like to kiss him. Girls, sure. Girls made sense. lanie made sense...warm, funny, straightforward, with a smile that felt safe.

Damien felt like getting blindsided by sothing fast and unexpected. Nothing about him was simple or safe or manageable. He was cold and infuriating, and he’d said actually said, out loud, in that low, rough voice, you’ve been driving fucking crazy since the day you moved in.

My stomach sank again just thinking about it.

I pressed my forehead against the cool window glass.

Preston Hall eventually ca into sight, polished and tranquil under the night lights, a blend of glass and architecture that radiated expensive beauty, unchanged by what had just happened to .

Joey pulled up, spinning around in his seat, his face one of soone preparing to deliver a grand finale.

"Well," he said, "this is officially the most interesting roommate situation in history."

I opened the door. "Goodnight, Joey."

His laughter echoed as I stepped out, still strong as I walked away, which felt fitting.

By the ti I reached the apartnt door, my nerves were practically buzzing. I kicked off my shoes near the door, going through the motions out of sheer habit because actual thought was temporarily out of reach.

The apartnt looked just as it always did. Clean, pristine, and perfectly arranged. The kitchen glead. The furniture was perfectly placed, sothing that had gone from infuriating to just the backdrop of my daily life. The list of rules was still there on the fridge, neat and laminated, rule one glaring at .

And all I could focus on was Damien’s lips against mine.

Fantastic. Just great. Love this for myself.

I drifted toward my bed like a malfunctioning robot trying to do what felt normal but completely failing. I sat on the edge of my bed, covering my face with my hands for a mont, just breathing, letting the quiet of the apartnt wrap around .

I lay back slowly, staring at the ceiling, letting my thoughts spiral wherever they wanted to go.

Maybe it was just the heat of the mont. Parties and closed spaces did weird things to people. Maybe it was a one-ti incident, like a passing weather system that had co and gone.

Maybe I’d been possessed in so way. Like I’d borrowed from sothing out there and returned slightly altered. That seed reasonable, and I fully intended to consider that theory.

Because there was no credible way to rationalize that I had genuinely, sincerely enjoyed kissing Damien Lockwood.

Right?

Right.

My lips were still tingling.

I touched them absentmindedly, just checking, and dropped my hand as soon as I realized what I was doing, like I had touched sothing hot.

Nope. Not doing that. Not thinking about how he kissed like he’d been contemplating it for longer than just tonight. Not thinking about his hand in my hair. Not thinking about that low, rough sound he made against my mouth.

My stomach flipped.

I rolled onto my side with a groan that ca from deep down. I slowly closed my eyes.

This was going to complicate everything. Living here, coexisting in this space, sitting across from him while he studied as if nothing had happened.

The scariest part? I wasn’t dreading it.

The scariest part was that, underneath all the panic, the denial, and the persistent tingling of my lips...

I wasn’t sure I wanted to forget it.

I wasn’t even sure if I didn’t want it to happen ever again.

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