(Licht)
Being half from here and half from there is a tilted balance.
Carrying this fire, the power of the gods, didn’t grant eternal life and youth. No. It allowed to see the world beyond, and to be able to act as a god in both ours and the wider one.
But it’s as if my chest was ripped open, a wound bleeding my life away.
I’m dying...
I can almost see my life being burnt like oil, in this fire from the beings-like-her.
Opening the gate toward their reality and their abilities is a sacrifice of my humanity.
My existence is burning and it hurts. It makes even more bitter and angry.
I will not die alone!
The first monster we encountered was but a pupa. The pupa of the only butterfly seen in years...
Innocent at first, it quickly shown its true nature, devouring almost instantly one of my friends.
She scread in terror, in agony for less than a second, as her body was turned inside out, and turned into the new vessel for the beast.
I released my wrath and burnt everything, unwillingly hurting my friends along.
Given the flas I can suddenly sweat, we agreed that they would stand back when I fight. At least until I’m able to focus this plasma I can exude into one direction.
Until then, the only attack I’m really able to do is basically making my body turn its close surroundings into heat and flas, high enough to lt most things.
I’m a bleak light... I’m not a full being so it’s impossible for to be as good as Licht was.
I’m envious. I’m bitter in so many ways...
Still... I defeated my first demon.
And so we moved on toward the next.
The jackal ca at more than I went at it.
I still have Rose’s first mories into this world. I still feel within my flesh the pain of the bites of the first monsters she encountered, as if they had been mine as well.
I crushed that thing rcilessly.
I strangled it strong enough to break its spine. My hands released enough light, increasing in intensity and temperature, to burn it to dust in a great fiery blow.
Doing so, releasing so much of my light, I could feel my heart suffering from arrhythmia.
I could feel a growing sensation of cold within my chest and blood stream.
It’s as if I was burning my life, my blood, my soul, more than I burnt the enemy.
Is that entropy?
It’s probably just the curse of their world as I bound it to my life.
Grasping another world than your own, is costing so much energy, it’s sould-draining...
I’m becoming the wicked one from so of dad’s old tales, don’t I?
Father... I miss you...
To think I never existed in your life, that your mory in mine is a fake, it pains .
In my nightmares, I manage to return ho, to you, and you don’t recognise as your daughter.
After the pain cos the realisation that it is the truth, I’m not. That brings a sharper pain waking up.
The family I know wasn’t mine. Copied mories is just the worst thing to have.
It makes you feel insane, unreal, and insignificant, worthless.
You’re not even one citizen amongst millions, you’re far less.
The family I know, would they still be alive, would not know .
Being altogether nothing and sothing could turn you mad.
And so, not entirely insane yet, we reached the penultimate monster I could feel the presence of in the nearby region.
And in that farm littered with animal bones and skeletons, I found the first monster with a human face I would destroy. My first demon turned around before I could strike and we both gasped.
Bleue recognised and called my na. I realised she was yours...
And I soon after saw you, asleep as if already dead.
~
I’ve had... Mixed feelings, to say the least, about this oiseau bleue of yours, since the beginning.
I share your childhood mories, and ergo your love for Blue is just as important for . But I t a being that is not her, not at all.
She is not her. Even less than I am you or you are the original Rose.
Being a reconstructed being from scraps, she is even farther than that.
And she carries the sll of a dangerous being-like-her, far more than the sll of a human.
Her large eyes don’t make her cuter, but less human. It’s a disguise.
I couldn’t trust that daiûa, that djinn who took the shape of the one dearest to us roses. There’s sothing ominous about her.
She’s an unholy creation even worse than us copies of an old human being. She’s been crafted by the others, with the logics from the other world.
She’s even less human than we are, which is saying sothing coming from .
She’s certainly less blue than we are roses.
She reeked of evil beings-like-her...
She saw that I was hesitant and undecided, but seriously considering to smit her down.
So she went next to you to hold your hand, and only turned her back on . She waited for to decide my next action, without plan to fight.
Obviously... She knows how to play us. And I couldn’t strike only over my bitter intuitions.
I asked her what happened to you, and her. I saw the weird aspect of her healing arm.
B - She’s awakening to her true self, freeing herself from her old traumatic shackles. Or, you know, sothing like that.
L - You’re way too romantic.
B - She had a nervous breakdown, because of her past traumas. We’re working them out. I helped her accepting what she is a little more, and a little what we are. She’s now resting. She does need a lot of rest lately though.
My mind got very muddy listening to her. A void clouded my thoughts briefly.
There are things I don’t want to think about.
I’m a little envious of this true Rose obviously.
And I could see that Bleue was... Good, to you.
L - Knowing what you are... Do you have powers?
She showed us her healing skeletal arm, and undressed her disfigured shoulder. She then told us what happened.
If that’s all there is to her unholy nature, there was no point for to bother about her. She’s not human alright, but she’s not a monster.
~
I wanted to use Rose to lure the last monster into a trap. Because I could already perceive that one would be a challenge.
My two huntresses friends however refused my idea, and we negotiated, including Bleue in the discussion in the end.
They didn’t want for us to simply leave Rose and Bleue like that.
They have less bitter heart than , and wanted us to give them a reassuring insurance.
But they still agreed sowhat to my plan...
These roses are as wounded and resentful as .
But they still felt genuinely emotional about you two. My hatred was too strong in my instance, occulting so of these thoughts.
After so more discussions, we gave Bleue one of our radio, to call us if the trap was to deviate.
We could all already feel the aura of the monster in the distance. It was going to sniff us out.
I didn’t plan our encounter well enough.
I didn’t think it would be so soon, before we could prepare anything, and so dire...
~
As I flew toward you and her, I felt its aura stronger.
I flew, burning my last days of life, to protect you two in the end... Fuck.
I felt its desire to destroy you. A will so more sour than mine... It made feel ridiculous.
Part of its wrath might have been intended against , but it saw only you. It could almost utter your na in the air as it flew.
I felt a wrath and an insane desire to kill inside that thing, so far beyond mine... But not entirely different to mine...
A painful mirror of my intentions was closing in.
A desire to destroy the other race.
The species... is almost the sa...
Beings-like-her are more humans than we would like to believe, or want to admit.
And I chose to beco more like them to better fight them.
Only as I reached the end, I began to notice the irony and futility.
But wrath prevailed.
I arrived shrouded in the light I was about to consu.
I t my fate, and so did it.
The reasonable ones of both races want to avoid war, and they survive.
But both of us, daiûa and , wanted to gut each other out, unleashing a storm of wrath.
To go all out, to destroy the very existence of the other.
A catharsis...
To feel alive, as we survive and overco the other’s blows.
We blew away each other with everything we had, without any concern but for ourselves and sliding emotions.
For the desperate ones, what is left but to find aning in one’s death?
The fires of despair burnt my clothes and my body, as well as the other one.
I saw that we brought desolation over the city as we fought, but it was aningless.
What mattered was our yell that we’re alive, that we want to survive, and that we want to destroy the scape-goat of all our misery ahead.
What mattered is that the ones with despair and anger in their heart found the logical aning of their life in that fight to the death.
I exhausted myself, but a part of was soothed by the suffering we both felt.
My light needed to recover for a minute as my body failed.
The shadow of myself was similar.
The huntresses ca in and I lost another friend.
We killed the demon that could have been ...
I’m exhausted Rose, I feel just like you...
~
You almost died from the shadow as it lted your inner self under its aura.
We’re lying down side by side just outside the city.
You will get better I say with a hoarse voice, tilting my head away from you afterward.
I feel bad, looking at you...
Huntress and Bleue are looking at us with worry in their eyes.
We won’t die today I repeat.
You have much left to live for. And Bleue is not ready to let you go.
It’s not over Rose. Not yet...
L - I’m sorry, Huntress, but you will have to wait for another day before you can eat my heart and take over our light.
H - There’s no hurry. I don’t think I want to take that burden over anymore. The world can live on without a Licht.
L - I think there should always be one Licht... Even if she’s not to follow my path, only to act as a deterrent, or a protector, against the future false gods to co.
H - I’ll think about it then. Now rest. Your skin is still in terrible shape from the burns.
Rest... I should rest...
I’m not dying today.
My pain never ceased ever since god chewed on my feet.
I’ve been tiring of living since then...
I’m glad I could help a blue rose nonetheless.
Huntress watches having my last breath, the light vanishing from my eyes.
~
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