(Rose)
I have withered.
But oblivion still doesn’t dissolve entirely.
I feel myself crumbling down, but still not fully dying everywhere.
I kept crying. Almost praying for death to release from that suffering;
Sothing does not let die.
Sothing wants to suffer.
My mories torn, ripped apart like shreds of paper away from . My identity shred into dissolving pulp from every side and corner.
All in an endless night without any sensation from my body remaining.
The hellish abyss beyond reality, where I’m not allowed to disappear, is now my jail.
It’s a grim endless end...
~
At so point, a light of hope appeared, as a figure of speech.
A mantle of darkness even deeper than the abyss appeared to my illusion of sight.
Sothing darker than night had co for , wrapping my dusting leftovers in its linen.
That silk of ink brought back together, put back together, to a humanoid silhouette even.
That silk drew the shape that my chunks of flesh or mories filled, randomly.
Together, we almost looked like sothing trying to be alive and human.
And fragnts of voices echoed in my broken mind.
I realised my spirits were now a scattered jigsaw puzzle.
And I could figuratively feel her fingers beginning to piece them together in .
She clumsily attempted to reconstruct .
I could feel my emotions, thoughts and mories being swapped, turned around and rearranged. Thus over and over, with every little piece of remaining, until a consciousness resembling a little bit to what I once was finally clicked together and worked. So thoughts travelled.
I felt like waking up, a little.
I was still out there in the hole of daiûa, or worse, and shapeless.
N - Can you understand ?
R - I... I can... Nightmare... It’s you, right?
N - Yes...
My emotions and thoughts grew like a puff of smoke from there, wrapping her and us. I hugged her as tight and warmly as my absence of body could. I cried over, so relieved in that nightmare.
I’ve been so terrified and so much in pain, for goodness knows how long. It feels like decades of loneliness just ended.
Feeling her close to is heaven caressing in the lost depth of hell.
I would kiss her in gratitude if I only could.
For now, my soul just overflows with suffering to excise.
Waves of sadness spread and vanish in the void surrounding us.
Pieces of my mind sent too far wither and die.
I feel like I’m waking up again.
I’ve cried enough for now.
R - Where are we? What happened to us?
N - We died. What’s left of us being digested in the belly of the beast.
R - What’s left of us?
N - What was able to survive on the other structure of reality, in smaller fragnts ford with T.I. I’ve rebuilt my awareness and mory first. Then I began collecting what I could still find of yours. I saved what I could of you...
I can feel that I’ve lost a lot more of myself this ti. I am dead after all...
And there are thus wide gaps in my mories and ideas. Most are surely blind spots, but so I can even feel they’re missing.
I barely know and rember how I am. But I still do mostly, thanks to Nightmare. And thanks to Blu.
R - I had a pendant... I think it helped... Safeguard parts of . In a seed.
N - I can still hear very distant echoes of ourselves out there, far beyond this plane.
R - aning?
N - We have a thin chance of actually returning into the reality you know soday. As long as we manage to survive in here.
A chance to live again...
Should I even consider it? My doubts irradiate.
Nightmare strangles them and imdiately.
N - Don’t.
R - Why...
N - ...
She’s trying to find the right words, the right idea to keep alive. The best fuel to give to when I’ve lost my will to live...
She rummages through my remaining mories, looking for it.
I’m completely under her power. She could make anything she wants out of what’s left of my mind.
She could just eat , turning into nutrients for herself.
Yet she doesn’t want to take control in any way or form.
That’s not what she wants...
What does she wants?
Life... Chaos...
And curiosity, for what would happen next... In stories...
What would happen after the story is over.
After the prince and princess are wed. After the hero has won. After the villain has died...
I have a blurry recollection of wings of light and darkness.
N - You bring chaos. You make life interesting. You make things change and evolve around your path.
You make the impossible possible...
Who told that before, I don’t rember. So mories that seed to fit that Nightmare brought to were never mine.
Because she, and her house looked like and mine...
R - I’m... I’ve failed... As a human.
N - I don’t care for what you want to call yourself. Life itself is the only thing making life interesting. I want to see more, and so do you.
A little part of understands her nonsense. I can relate.
Sothing will always happen next as long as sothing is alive. It doesn’t need to be human.
I do want to see what happens next...
And I briefly recall saying to myself, more than many tis, that I enjoyed being alive in this world. It’s always been true and sincere.
Daiûas bring chaos and make events and stories fascinating to my eyes.
They always motivated to evolve.
Though I’m not really sure who’s anymore.
N - That will change. What matters now is that we want to survive.
R - So how do we do that? Where are we?
First, we’ll secure a spore of ourselves. A seed that could lie dormant forever even in this awkwardly hostile place we found ourselves in, and regrow ourselves when it reaches a better environnt.
First is first.
Then, we will find our way to grow inside that space that is trying to digest us.
~
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