Save Scumming Chapter Seven - Not-So-Plain Jane

Chapter Seven - Not-So-Plain Jane

Not-So-Plain Jane was rather... a lot for soone who may or may not have been a criminal.

"So, what're we talking here? So B&E, you gonna murk an ex-lover? You don't look the gangster type," she said as she walked around . "Damn, you have the potential girl."

"Uh, thank you?" I tried. I wasn't uncomfortable with people staring, but she was looking at in a different kind of way.

"So, this gig of yours, whatever it is, what'd you need for it?" Saying that, she walked over to a counter and hopped up backwards onto it so that she was sitting facing . It brought her eyes level with my own.

I licked my lips, but this was a burned tiline anyway, so... "I'm looking for armoured gear that'll keep safe enough. I'm going to sneak into a portal and take it out, solo."

She blinked. "You a secret C-ranker or sothing? Because that kind of firepower does not shop here, I'll tell you that."

I shook my head. "I can handle myself. That's all you need to know."

"But you want gear anyway?" she asked. "Huh... weird one! I dig it. Don't dig your style though. What's the budget?"

"Would you laugh if I said four hundred?"

She laughed.

That was a yes.

"Girl, you serious? Damn... wait, no, don't just leave, I can make this work. Damn though, four hundo... better be in cash."

"Yeah, in cash," I said.

She shook her head, locks flying. "Okay, okay... no, not okay, that's not nearly enough. What do you need exactly?"

"Anything halfway protective that'll cover my ID, and..." A gun would be too much, wouldn't it? I had plans for making cash, but none that worked today. "And a knife or a short blade."

"Huh," she said. Her hands went to the counter and she kicked her legs out. "A thousand five."

"Pardon?"

"You pay your four hundred, then gim a thousand five later."

"And if I flake out?"

She snorted. "I've got your face on my servers, love," she said with a tap to the side of her temple.

That wouldn't do her any good if I reloaded, but... yeah, I got it.

"That sounds good. What's the interest rate?"

She snorted. "Girl, if I could do math I wouldn't be selling shit out of an alleyway! Nah, nah,no interest, only my interest if you don't pay up, catch?"

"I'll pay up," I said.

She rubbed her hands together. "Okay, now the fun part. See, I get to pick the gear. No ifs ands or buts about it. You think it makes your ass look fat, doesn't matter, gears yours, and you're paying for it."

"And if you give cheap scop?" I asked.

"I won't, Plain-Jane promise!"

Wasn't she Not-So-Plain Jane a mont ago? "Okay, let's see what this looks like."

"Yes!" she cheered before jumping off her counter. "Okay, co here, in the light. C'mon. We don't get custors for another two hours or so, take off that coat, and your pants."

"You want to strip?"

"Not out here, we have changing rooms. What're your sizes? No, don't tell ." She whipped out sothing long and... oh, a tape asure? I stood stiffly while Jane wrapped the asure around my bust, waist, hips, then each thigh in turn. She checked my shoulder width and arm span as well. "Kay! In the room, and rember, for this kind of deal, no complaining."

She didn't need to give my ass a smack on the way by.

Still... she wasn't entirely wrong. If the gear she gave was worth it, then yeah, this was worth it.

Damn, would I be able to convince her again? This eting felt kind of random, did I even rember all the little details to replicate it, and could I reliably do it again?

Crap.

My Save was a solid forty minutes of travel back. By the ti I returned and got another closer... ah, I was going to either lose this ti I was 'wasting' now, or I'd have to live with whatever Jane handed over.

I waited in a rather tight changing room, unwilling to just strip so easily. I jumped when a pair of pants wrapped over the top of the door and almost smacked . "Here!" Jane called. "Don't put these on yet."

"Uh, okay," I said.

I pulled the pants down and looked them over. Cargo pants, but the more military style ones. There was a gang of ex-mil in Fortress ENE that wore similar stuff. I tugged at it. It was thick, padded on the inside with sothing that felt warm and kind of absorbent. The knees had so sort of gel padding over them as well, and the inner thighs were reinforced.

I found a price-tag, wrinkled up but still connected to the pants and my eyes boggled. Six hundred?

Next ca a belt. No old price tags, but it felt quality, and there were straps that ca with it for a holster. If I had a decent knife with a good holster.

"And hup!" Jane said, and I jumped as two things slid through the bottom. A pair of shoe boxes and a knife, in a nice cloth sheath. "Don't put anything on yet!" she said.

"Okay," I replied.

I grabbed the knife and checked it over. It wasn't anything too special. Military surplus, maybe a foot long, with the end thicker than the middle. It was part combat knife, part machete, and all-black with a full-tang. Nicer than what we got at Luna Corp, actually.

Find this and other great novels on the author's preferred platform. Support original creators!

The shoe boxes had boots. Hiking boots, with strong laces, both a deep brown. I hadn't even thought about buying shoes for this.

One of them still had a price sticker on the side. Four hundred and thirty.

"Christ," I muttered.

"Here, and here," Jane said. She tossed sothing in a plastic package under the door, then a hat.

The hat was just a plain black baseball-style cap, no markings, no logos. The brim was a little worn, and soone had pinched a pair of tal rings through it, but otherwise, plain.

The plastic package was a gas mask. A cheaper one, with several straps and two thin filters. Probably no more than a hundred dollars at a hardware store, but still.

Actually, that would work to hide part of my identity, and so portal worlds had toxic air as well. A dust mask wouldn't stop anything, but it might help. And when it wasn't needed, I could pull the filters out and just breathe normally enough.

"Haha! Here it is!" Jane shouted from way deeper in the warehouse. Then I heard her running back. "I've been looking for soone to wear this forever! Ohhh, this is gonna be good! They made these for this team of all-female spec-ops bodyguard types. All D and C-rankers. The sorta gals that are ant to look good standing behind so hoity politico type and are expected to be able to kick ass too. But they all vetoed wearing them."

I was starting to be a little concerned, though... gear for C-rankers? There were... okay, a few thousand C-rankers in Fortress ENE, but they were still usually pretty important.

Then the item in question was flung over the top of the door, and I pulled it down. "Jane," I said.

"Yeah?"

"This is a fucking leotard," I replied.

"Uh-huh!" she said right back. I could see her feet tapping excitedly on the other side. "Put it on! Do you know how? I can help!~"

"I'm fine, but, uh."

"Rember the deal? Don't make blackmail your firm little ass!"

That woman was insane. I should have Reloaded then and there. But... the leotard felt like quality. It was armoured too, padded along the ribs and breasts and back. Not very padded, but still...

"It's top-shelf shit... from four years ago. Got a heap of them for cheap and no one wants them, but you're tall and lanky enough! And it's like, sixty-percent portal-world material. C-grade at least! You're holding sothing worth a whoooole lot there!"

"Worth a lot, but I'll look ridiculous," I muttered.

She heard, of course. "Not with the drip I picked out, babe!"

Screw it. If it was too embarrassing, I'd Reload.

Now... how did soone actually put on a leotard? Closest I'd ever co was a one-piece bathing suit and this didn't seem as stretchy. Ah, there was a zipper. I groaned. "I'm not taking off my underwear, you pervert."

"How else will we know if it's hiding your coochie right?" she asked before laughing. "Don't worry so much. You're wearing pants. Prude!"

I grumbled, but took off my clothes (most of it) in a hurry, then fumbled my way into the leotard. I'd never admit it to Jane, but I put it on backwards at first. The zipper was on the front with this one, probably to make it easier for a person to slip into without help.

It was... comfy? A little tight, but not too badly so, and when I stretched and moved, it moved with . Damnit, this was quality gear.

I put the pants on next, then the belt and boots, finally the mask, which needed to use the knife to cut into that damnable plastic wrapping. After adjusting that, I slid the hat on.

I felt... comfortable enough. The leotard top left my arms exposed, but no more than a sleeveless Tee would. The weird part was having a slip of skin exposed on my hips above the pants, but I'd gone clubbing in shirts that didn't cover my stomach before so I could live with this much.

"Alright," I said, voice warped a little by the mask. "I'm stepping out."

Jane was there, waiting, and I could almost feel her iris-less eyes scanning over. "Ooooh, bitch you are H-A-a buncha Ws-T, Hawwwwt! I am good at my job. When you die trying to solo that portal you will do it in style!"

I crossed my arms. "Thanks," I said.

"No, it's... missing sothing. The silhouette is there, but... yeah, one sec!" She ran off, then she ran back, carrying a jacket with her.

It looked like more military-ish surplus, only it was all matte-black.

I took the coat, then glanced at it. "This is like, three sizes too big," I said.

"That's the point, babe! Put it on! Wear it loose!"

I sighed, but did as she asked. It was a good coat. Looked like it had so plates of sothing hard sewn into it that made it a bit bulky, but it felt like a tough, high-quality material.

"Oh! I am good!" Jane said. "Yup, you keep that, and when you wreck it, co back and I'll drip you out even more."

"Uh-huh," I said.

"Now... four hundo. You said you had that much on you, and I want it in my pretty little hands." She wagged her eyebrows. "Or you could pay in other ways."

I gave her her cash, redressed in my usual clothes, and then was out of there, a heavy bag by my side.

***