She looked at her mother.
At the tears on her mother's face. At her mother's reddened eyes. At her mother's hands — so thin, nothing but bone.
She said nothing.
But her arms slowly wrapped around her mother.
Just like when she was small — eyes closed, cheek resting on her mother's shoulder.
The reel of images began to fast-forward again.
Soon it reached second year of high school.
She walked into the classroom and found her seat.
In front of her sat a boy. He often gazed out the window — a lean profile, brow faintly furrowed, the look of soone carrying a quiet sorrow.
She learned later that his na was Yukinoshita Kagami.
And later still, while working at the convenience store, she t a girl nad Yukinoshita Shizuku.
A very beautiful girl.
The store manager said that starting today, this girl would be her coworker — and asked her to show the newcor the ropes.
She was a little nervous.
Not only was this girl strikingly beautiful, but she carried that air of an untouchable young lady — the kind you only saw on television — which made Nayotake worry she might be a difficult person to work with.
As it turned out, she was completely wrong. Beneath that cool exterior was soone warm, attentive, gentle, and lovely.
Not long after, Yukinoshita Kagami — the boy who sat in front of her — began coming to the store every evening to wait for Yukinoshita Shizuku.
The shared surna made it easy enough to guess: they were siblings.
The images played on.
That night she'd been hiding from debt collectors.
Not wanting to trouble anyone, she had huddled alone beneath a streetlamp at the entrance to a subway station.
She hadn't expected to run into both Yukinoshita siblings at once.
Shizuku invited her to co back to their place.
She refused again and again — but she couldn't hold out against Shizuku, and the two of them dragged her ho anyway.
From that night onward, she slowly grew closer and closer to the Yukinoshita siblings.
Shizuku would often have Kagami bring her homade bento for Nayotake.
At lunch, Kagami would sit with her naturally, as if it had always been that way, and they'd eat together.
Gradually, they beca friends.
She gradually grew used to being invited to stay over at Shizuku's place.
She gradually grew used to Shizuku always having an endless stream of things to talk about at night, keeping her up until the small hours.
She gradually grew used to waking in the morning to the sound of Shizuku and Kagami bickering in the living room.
She had never had a single friend, from childhood until now. She didn't know what friendship was supposed to feel like.
But... perhaps this — what she had now — was what they called friendship.
Then ca another night.
She was lying in the guest room at Shizuku's house. Shizuku sat on the edge of the bed, unusually quiet.
"Nayotake."
Shizuku suddenly spoke.
"There's sothing I want to tell you."
She looked at Shizuku.
"Actually…"
Shizuku lowered her head, fingers twisting the corner of the duvet.
"Kagami and I — we're not related by blood."
It was the first ti she had learned that Kagami's real surna was Tsushima.
The following morning, she found Shizuku sitting alone at her desk, holding a small stack of photographs and staring into nothing — and then the tears ca.
For the first ti, she understood.
Shizuku was in love with Kagami.
Shizuku went on to tell her that Kagami was about to move out and live on his own — and she couldn't bear it.
Nayotake thought of that day she'd received the hospital call telling her that her mother had attempted suicide and been rushed into ergency care.
Yes — being suddenly separated from soone you love must be a terribly hard thing to accept.
So she — who ordinarily did nothing more than listen quietly to their everyday stories — did sothing rare.
She offered soone else unsolicited advice about their life.
"If you don't want to be apart, then just refuse to be apart — no matter what."
"As long as you can stay by his side, as long as it makes you happy — there's nothing wrong with being a little selfish."
"Why agonize so much over what he thinks?"
"I only want to be near you — so what does it matter to you?"
Besides, Kagami clearly doted on Shizuku, didn't he?
How lovely.
What a worry that only soone truly blessed could have.
Afterward.
Through Shizuku and Kagami, she found herself eting more and more people.
Sayuri from the Manga Research Club. Senior Akane. Senior Sonoko.
Seika from the sa class — and through her and the Light Music Club, Kikuri-kouhai, PA-san-kouhai, and Shizuka, who had joined around the sa ti as herself.
They were all wonderful people.
Then one day, Kagami, Sayuri, and the others told her they wanted her to be the lead vocalist for their band at the cultural festival.
She felt both excited and terrified.
It was the first ti so many people had invited her to do sothing together — and for a band performance at the cultural festival, no less.
She had never once imagined that sothing like this could happen to her.
She didn't want to let everyone down — to betray the trust and friendship they'd placed in her.
But she was afraid. She had never done anything like this before. Her ability to interact normally with people had all but atrophied. She feared she might not be able to live up to their faith in her.
She was afraid of dragging everyone down.
She wavered again and again — but no matter how much her inner voice told her no, she couldn't stop herself from saying yes.
After receiving the song Kagami had written, she would co ho from every shift at work and secretly burrow under her covers to practice, long into the night.
In those days, beyond work and studying, her mind was completely taken over by those notes.
She had never looked forward to a single day arriving with this much joy before.
The feeling of being needed, of being trusted — it made her dizzy with sothing she couldn't na.
All the way to the day of the cultural festival itself.
Every song — she gave it everything she had.
Every song — she poured every feeling inside her into it.
The lonely childhood. The days of being pushed aside. The nights spent crying quietly into her pillow.
All of it beca song.
It didn't matter if no one understood.
She simply wanted to sing — to give her voice to everyone in that room.
At last, the performance ended safely.
She gently pressed a hand to her chest, where a dull ache had begun to bloom.
Just a little longer. Hold on until the curtain call. Just until the curtain rose — that was all she needed.
But why — why did it have to be now that her heart chose to act up?
If she fainted here, it would only cause everyone more trouble.
In the images, the mont when everyone noticed sothing was wrong — Kagami reached out and caught her just before she crumpled to the floor.
And then the screen went black.
Shimizu Nayotake continued to drift in the boundless dark.
She watched those images dissolve, piece by piece.
In the end, it was who ruined the performance, wasn't it?
Just as I thought — soone like can only bring misfortune to everyone around her.
Shimizu Nayotake suddenly felt cold.
She slowly curled in on herself, arms wrapping around her own body.
She pressed her forehead down against her drawn-up knees.
So cold…
So tired…
If she simply never woke up from this — perhaps that wouldn't be so bad.
After all, so things simply can't be helped.
She closed her eyes.
The darkness around her rippled outward in rings, slowly shaping itself into a whirlpool — and it began, little by little, to pull Shimizu Nayotake in.
But just then.
She felt a warm hand close tightly around hers.
A voice ca from sowhere very, very far away.
Growing closer. Growing clearer.
As if hovering just beside her ear, over and over again.
"Nayotake!"
She snapped her eyes open.
The darkness was gone entirely.
In its place was Tsushima Kagami's face — close, so close — etched with worry.
____
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