Surviving in Blue Archive Chapter 287 108: What Is the True Self?

OST: [The 35 | Morose Drear] Blue Archive

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"Hahahaha! Hahahahaha!"

In this space where only Arona existed besides , I laughed as I pleased, laughing until tears stread down my face, until the laughter turned into violent coughing.

The blue-haired girl who had been silently standing guard finally stepped closer and patted my back to help catch my breath.

"Ha… haha…"

Gasping, I wiped the corners of my eyes. "Going so far with realism when it is completely unnecessary is truly irritating."

"Sensei, what nonsense are you talking about? That's just how it was designed," Arona complained. "Besides, if it wasn't this realistic, you wouldn't be able to see such a cute !"

"True, true."

I nodded repeatedly, then grabbed Arona's hand and gazed at her affectionately. "Arona, did you see that? My acting fooled all of them! Hahaha, as long as I get serious, sothing this trivial is easy!"

At that point, I could not help wanting to laugh again.

Neru aside.

The so-called seminar President, the so-called head of the SPTF. Two peerless geniuses who held the highest authority over both the light and shadow of Millennium Science School, one of Kivotos's three major academies, were actually played in the palm of my hand.

"They actually… actually believed that whole story of mine. They thought I genuinely wanted to protect that heap of scrap tal that killed . They thought I was so kind-hearted saint who bears no grudges?"

Yes, Kei and AL-1S might be two different existences.

But just as Rio said, why could Kei not be a disguise worn by AL-1S?

I had already been deceived once, and for that, I paid with my life.

So I would never allow the sa scene to play out again.

"Then, Sensei," Arona tilted her head and asked curiously, "since you actually agree with Rio's way of thinking, and believe that Arisu… um, okay, that AL-1S is a threat, why did you oppose Rio back then?"

I had to admit, Arona was indeed an excellent straight man.

"Of course it was because making such a 'gentle' choice would be easier for more students to accept."

Rio's excessive rationality, her reputation within Millennium and Kivotos, and the reactions of Himari and Neru fully explained the public perception.

I answered frankly. "To win over more students, before AL-1S truly reveals power sufficient to destroy Kivotos, I must do everything I can to protect it. That way, those people who harbor naive fantasies will extend those fantasies onto ."

What was more…

"In doing so," I murmured, not restraining my excitent at all, "a weapon capable of destroying all of Kivotos falls neatly into my hands."

By every ans necessary, attempting to fully contain AL-1S, and then turning that world-ending power into sothing completely opposite.

At least in this regard, I had not lied to Rio or Himari.

If I could grasp AL-1S's power.

Then perhaps, even if I never forced myself to win over any more students, I could still obtain…

True peace of mind, maybe.

But that was still an unknown.

"The first thing to determine…" I closed my eyes. "As expected, I need to test whether AL-1S and Kei are actually the sa existence."

Arona asked instead, "Is that really that important?"

That question truly matched Arona's level of intellect.

"Of course it's important."

I answered decisively.

Rather, how could it possibly not be important?

"If Kei really is an identity played by AL-1S, then its threat level is even higher, and using so extre asures would be acceptable."

I paused. "For example, the interrogation Saori ntioned. But it cannot be done by Saori. She belongs to Beatrice. I cannot trust her. Unfortunately, there does not seem to be a suitable candidate."

"I see." Arona nodded as if she half understood, then asked, "Then what if it's not?"

"If it's not…"

"If it's not, then you won't do it?" Arona looked at innocently, but her questioning carried an oddly pressing force.

After a mont of silence, I took a deep breath. "If it's not, then we proceed as originally planned and separate Kei from AL-1S."

"Why?"

"What do you an, why?"

"Isn't that strange?"

In Arona's azure eyes, there seed to be an unfamiliar, peculiar glimr.

"By your own words, you are already completely disappointed in Arisu and only want to make use of the power she might possess. If that's the case."

Her voice was unbelievably gentle, yet to it sounded deafening.

"Whether it's AL-1S, or Kei, or Arisu herself, wouldn't it be fine to handle them all in the sa way?"

For a mont, I was left speechless by Arona's question. Only after a long while did I force out a line that even I found hollow and weak.

"This… this is different…"

"How is it different?"

For so reason, today's Arona insisted on digging to the root, and an inexplicable anger rose in my chest.

Even you are questioning with this attitude?

"Everything about it is different!" I growled, and ca up with what I thought was an appropriate reason. "If it's Arisu… if it's Arisu, she would be easier for to control. Put that way, you understand now, right!"

"Sensei."

Arona called to calmly. "You still hope to believe, after all."

"…What?"

"Arisu."

Those eyes, clear as the sky, were like a mirror reflecting my inner heart, making afraid to et her gaze.

But she had no intention of letting go.

Standing on her tiptoes, stretching out her hands to cup my cheeks, Arona forced to face her directly.

Even the hot breath with a sweet, strawberry-like scent was perfectly simulated by the Shittim Chest.

"Don't run away, Sensei."

For the first ti ever, Arona spoke with such seriousness, revealing a truth that I truly, truly did not want to face right now.

"You still have feelings for Arisu."

In that instant, my mind went completely blank.

Then, scene after scene of my ti with Arisu surfaced in my mories.

Her trust in . Her attachnt to . Her fondness for .

The next mont, tears burst from my eyes uncontrollably.

"Arona…"

I held tightly onto the only being in this world I could trust, sobbing.

"Why… why did it turn out like this… why Arisu… why, why on earth…"

Even though it was Kei who showed no rcy and tried to kill .

I could not do it.

I could not completely separate her from it.

I wanted to believe. Believe that Arisu and Kei were not the sa existence.

But… just like Rio said.

A slender hand stroked the back of my head, making my crying grow even more ragged, my words incoherent.

"Why… why did Arisu want to kill . I was so good to her. Rio was persuaded by . I didn't do anything wrong. She even called Sensei. I wanted to treat her as a student, so why, why isn't she just a normal student. As long as she's a student… as long as the card shows captured…"

"It's okay, it's okay." Arona whispered comfortingly by my ear. "It's not your fault, Sensei."

"This Sensei… this Sensei isn't sothing I wanted to be…! Wasn't Arisu also sothing the GSC President left behind? Then why, why would she want to kill …"

"There, there." Arona said indulgently. "Wasn't I also left to you by the GSC President? So you see, the GSC President would never harm you. At the very least, you can completely trust , and you can completely trust that missing GSC President."

Maybe that was true.

But right now, I did not want to think about anything. I just wanted to vent all the emotions I had suppressed for so long to Arona.

"Arona… I'm really so tired… living every single day in fear like this, when will it ever end… once you're not by my side…"

"You can't say that!" Arona protested. "I'll always stay by your side!"

"Ugh… I know, I know. But no matter how careful I am… accidents will still happen, just like this ti. I can only keep on trying to capture… but I really don't know how to do it, and I don't want to do it that way…"

Arona held even tighter. "Mm, I know. I know better than anyone that you are actually a gentle person, Sensei. Even in a situation like this, you don't want to deceive anyone's feelings just to gain more power."

"No, I've already done sothing like that. Tsubaki, she is…"

"No." Arona said. "You haven't truly done that yet."

"But, but I really did have impure, disgusting motives."

"But you also truly didn't get the chance to do it. Besides, given the circumstances, the fact that you can even feel guilty about it is already amazing."

I had still been sobbing, but I could not help laughing.

"Are you comforting , or are you mocking ?"

"Hmm…" Arona pondered for quite a while. "Both?"

"Haha, you really are…"

I held tightly in my arms the only existence in this world I could trust.

Feeling that illusory yet real warmth and touch, I said softly.

"Arona, it's really good that you're here."

Even without authority, it did not matter.

No...

Precisely because of that, it was for the best.

"Really?" Arona lit up, then asked tentatively, "Then can tomorrow's strawberry milk be doubled?"

"…Tomorrow only."

"Yay!"

Arona's cheering rang in my ears, a bit noisy.

After chatting with her a little longer, I returned to reality, fully satisfied.

Looking at myself in the mirror, no different from before entering the Shittim Chest, except with a more resolute expression.

I put on the sa smile as always, cold light flashing in my eyes.

"I will never cry."

With that, I took a deep breath and turned around.

Next, it was ti to deal with Arisu's matter.