In the capital of the Endless Empire, atop a massive tower hundreds of ters high, a bulky man munched on a bag of chips while reading the latest chapter of Tales of the Endless Empire. The Governor was very pleased with the Curator’s work. Double chapters were simply the best. He couldn’t wait to see what would happen in the fight between Kael and Thalion. Would Ankhet be revived? Or had the pillar been destroyed? He couldn’t quite rember the story anymore.
This tower was the Governor’s private reading spot, overlooking the endless city he had to manage for the Endless Emperor. Right now, he was on a short break, stuffing his mouth with chips coated in extra spice.
“Oh yes… that really hits the spot,” he murmured, closing his eyes in satisfaction.
Then ca the sound of creaking wood, the trapdoor behind him opening. The only way anyone could get up here. Sure, teleportation circles were common, but he always insisted on using the stairs as an excuse to tell his wife he was “working out.” So far, it had worked well. Well enough since he was still alive.
With a loud grunt, the Curator hauled himself through the trapdoor and slamd it shut. His chest heaved, sweat dripped from his forehead. Right, he wasn’t allowed to teleport at all, so he actually had to climb every single stair. Unlucky.
“Why… do… I have to… co up here?” the Curator panted, pausing between words just to catch his breath. He looked utterly miserable.
“It’s good exercise, don’t be so negative. Builds character. With your pale skin, I’d make you climb even more often if we didn’t desperately need you to keep writing. Also, just to be clear, should my wife ever ask, the ‘attractive lead’ tag was there from the very start. Got it? Otherwise…” The Governor trailed off.
“Yeah, sure… that’s why you made walk all those stairs?” the Curator asked, one eyebrow raised skeptically.
“No, no, of course not. Gu Gu Gu. Just a side note. Totally not important... The real reason I brought you here is to celebrate. We’re number 17 on the popularity charts this week! I salute you and your writing!” the Governor declared proudly.
A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.
“…Ookay. That’s pretty out of character for you, saying sothing nice to . I really need sleep, you know. I’ve been working for days. Just look at my fingers. They’re bleeding like I’ve been tortured in so dieval dungeon!” The Curator rambled, waving his hands dramatically in front of the Governor’s face. The fingers did look terrible. Two were probably broken. Maybe he should call a healer… but had he actually paid insurance for the Curator? Uhh. He wasn’t sure. And if not, that could cost serious money. Less money ant his wife would return early from her shopping trip. Yeah, he couldn’t have that. Besides, ten fingers was a lot. Eight should be enough for writing, right?
“Oh, but you’ll continue the double chapters. No way around it. Look at the comnts. They love it! Here, this one’s from Pawnbarian: ‘Thanks for the chapter, bossman!’Gu Gu Gu, bossman that’s ! Thank you for being aweso, your Governor.” He grinned while typing his reply on the glowing screen.
“Oh, and one more thing. We’ll only accept comnts on part two from now on. I am the best multitasker in the world, but even I can’t keep track of two separate threads anymore.” The Governor nodded excitedly at his own brilliance.
“I’m not writing double chapters again,” the Curator groaned. “The Immortal Empress will appear soon, and you know how she is! Even the best scribes were burned alive for hours just for failing to capture her beauty perfectly. And now I’m supposed to describe her with words? Do you realize how screwed I am?” he exclaid loudly.
The Governor frowned. Hmm… the Curator wasn’t wrong. The Immortal Empress was nothing but trouble. Still… he wanted his double chapters.
“Please, have so rcy. My fingers hurt so much. Look, this one doesn’t even move anymore, and the angle definitely isn’t normal!” The Curator pleaded, holding up a crooked finger.
“Well, if you don’t run back down to your writer’s desk, your fingers won’t be the only thing that hurts. And rember. It’s all for the glory of the Endless Empire!” the Governor thundered.
Besides, he really didn’t want the Immortal Empress’s attention. That woman was a catastrophe wrapped in beauty.
No, better to lean back in his chair, crunch a few more chips, and enjoy the comnts.
“Oh, Boose101, you’re so right. GLORY TO THE ENDLESS EMPIRE! MARCH UNTIL THE END OF TI! GU GU GU!”
ps: Maybe watched too much one piece. Gu gu gu is his laugh :)
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