The Alpha Who Regrets Losing Me Chapter 42 – Moon and Bloodlines

By the ti the afternoon light began to turn golden against the stone, I had stopped trying to asure ti by anything familiar.

There were no shifting pack sounds here, no routines I recognized, no changing rhythm of forest life to tell when the day had moved from one hour into the next. There was only the enclosed stillness of the place Kael had taken to, broken now and then by the scrape of his boots against stone, the quiet movent of air through narrow openings in the walls, and the constant, unwelco knowledge that I was not where I had chosen to be.

And yet, beneath all of that, sothing else remained.

The moon.

Not visible now, not this early in the day, but present all the sa, like a thread that had been tied sowhere beneath my skin and left there to remind that what had started could no longer be forced back into silence.

Kael had noticed the change in . I knew that much without needing him to say it. The way he watched had altered since I had co back from that strange, impossible place where the woman had stood beneath the moon and spoken as though disappearance had never been a loss at all, but a crossing.

He was no longer looking at like a man trying to solve a mystery. He was looking at like soone who had finally begun to recognize the shape of his fear.

That should have made feel stronger.

Instead, it made the room feel smaller.

He stood near the opening that let the afternoon light through, one hand braced against the wall, his expression unreadable from a distance and all the more dangerous because of it. He had been silent for long enough that I had almost begun to prefer it, but then he turned toward fully, and the tension in the room sharpened before he even spoke.

"I know what he saw now," he said.

I looked up from where I sat, my back resting against the rough stone behind .

His voice was steady, but not calm. There was sothing tighter beneath it, as though he had spent the past hour holding too many mories at once and had finally lost patience with his own silence.

"You keep speaking in pieces," I said. "If you want to care, stop making assemble the truth for you."

For a mont, I thought he might ignore that. Instead, he stepped away from the wall and ca closer, the light falling differently across his face now, catching the harder lines of it and making him look less like the Alpha I had once known and more like the brother of a missing man who had spent too many years listening to half-told stories and trying to pretend they ant nothing.

"My brother changed before he disappeared," Kael said.

"Not all at once. It happened slowly enough that the pack told itself it was stress, obsession, weakness, anything easier than the truth. But I rember the way he began to look at things that weren’t there. I rember the way he would stop mid-sentence, as if sothing older than thought had reached inside him and turned his attention elsewhere. I rember him standing beneath the moon as if he were listening to sothing no one else could hear."

His gaze locked onto mine.

"And now I’ve seen you do the sa."

The words did not frighten the way they might have once. They settled into a place already prepared for them.

"So that’s why I’m here," I said quietly. "Not because of the bond. Not because you regretted rejecting . Because now I look enough like a pattern you recognize that you’d rather cage than lose sight of ."

Sothing flickered in his eyes at that, sothing sharper than irritation.

"You still insist on making everything smaller than it is."

"No," I replied, rising to my feet at last. "I insist on naming it correctly."

I had expected him to snap back imdiately, but instead he went still in a way that felt more dangerous than anger.

"You think I brought you here because I’m afraid," he said.

"I think you brought here because control feels easier to you than uncertainty."

That landed.

I saw it in the shift of his jaw, the slight tightening at the corners of his mouth, the way he took one slow breath before answering.

"You have no idea what uncertainty looks like," he said.

I let out a humorless breath.

"That’s rich, coming from the man who tried to dictate my future in front of an entire pack."

Kael ca closer then, close enough that I had to tilt my chin slightly to keep holding his gaze, though I refused to step back.

His presence still carried that sa force it always had, that sa instinctive pressure that made other wolves lower their eyes or give ground without thinking. But whatever had once made do the sa had broken the night he rejected , and nothing that had happened since had restored it.

"If I had understood what you were then," he said, his voice lower now, "I would never have let you walk out of Blackthorn."

The choice of words made my stomach twist.

"Let ?" I repeated.

His hand rose before I could move away, fingers brushing a strand of hair back from my face in a gesture that should have been gentle and sohow felt more invasive because it tried to look like tenderness.

"Yes," he said. "Because if I had known, I would have kept you close enough to stop this before it started."

I knocked his hand away.

"This isn’t care, Kael."

His expression darkened slightly, but he did not retreat.

"No," he said. "It isn’t."

There was a terrible honesty in that answer.

It would have been easier if he had lied to , if he had wrapped all of this in the language of protection and pretended that was enough to justify it. Instead, he stood there and let the uglier truth breathe between us.

"This is necessity," he continued. "I know what happens when that thing reaches too deeply. I know what it takes. I know what it makes wolves give up. My brother lost his judgnt first, then his mate, and then himself. I won’t watch the sa story happen again."

I stared at him.

"You talk about them like they were swallowed by sothing monstrous, but that isn’t what I saw."

His focus sharpened instantly.

"What did you see?"

"The woman," I said. "She didn’t sound taken. She sounded chosen."

The effect of that single word was imdiate. Sothing in him hardened, not because he did not believe , but because he did.

"That’s exactly how it works," he said. "It doesn’t drag. It invites. It flatters. It offers purpose to wolves already half in love with their own ruin."

I felt anger rise so suddenly that it left a tallic taste at the back of my throat.

"You don’t get to call her ruined just because she left a life you could still understand."

He stepped even closer, crowding the space between us until the stone at my back beca part of the conversation.

"And you don’t get to romanticize disappearance because you spoke to a ghost in moonlight."

The heat of him, the force of him, the relentless certainty in his tone would once have been enough to unsettle into silence. Now it only sharpened my resistance.

"You’re afraid," I said.

Sothing changed in his expression then. Not denial. Not offense.

Recognition.

"Yes," he said quietly. "And fear makes n do what they should have done before regret becos useless."

The air between us turned dangerous in a different way then, no longer only because of anger, but because of how close he had co and how deliberately he stayed there.

His hand braced itself against the wall beside my shoulder, caging without touching again, and the look in his eyes was no longer the cold, public gaze of the Alpha who had once rejected for the stability of his pack.

This was worse.

This was private.

"You think I’m repeating his story," he said. "I’m not. I’m correcting it."

"You an controlling it."

"I an finishing what should have been secured the first ti."

The words were bad enough. The way he said them was worse, intimate with entitlent, as if the future he imagined had already begun to harden into fact.

"And what does that future look like to you?" I asked, though part of already knew I would hate the answer.

His gaze moved over my face with unsettling focus, lingering there long enough to make my skin feel too aware of itself.

"It looks like you staying where I can see you," he said. "It looks like you learning what you are without letting that thing take you beyond reach. It looks like my bloodline surviving what my brother failed to hold onto."

The aning settled slowly and then all at once.

I felt my whole body go still.

"You’re talking about children."

Kael did not look ashad.

"I’m talking about continuity."