The Butcher of Gadobhra Chapter 503: Notifying HR of a Problem

The crowd at the fountain in Sedgewick watched as the flaming chariot circled the town several tis. Twice it ca in for landings, but its speed was too high, and it was obvious the driver was having trouble with the concept of 'Slow Down.' Eventually, the Butcher leaned forward, took the reins from the driver, and pulled back gently, slowing the horses and bringing in the chariot to a bumpy but passable landing in the middle of town. The heat from the horses drove back the crowd, but didn't seem to bother the Butcher in the slightest.

Ozzy was looking fit and tanned. His bronze skin shone, showcasing his physique. Before getting off the chariot, he offered so final advice. "Tight hand on the reins, firm voice, and never jerk the reins at high speed. Those horses are trained well; It's you and who are screwing things up. You're doing great, Icarus, on everything but landings and slowing down."

He grinned at Ozzy and tossed his head to get the mop of bright red hair out of his eyes. "When can you teach the trick with the sharks?"

"Stop by so ti, and I'll give you a lesson. I expect you'll figure it out quickly."

"I'll keep practicing. But I'd better go, too much flammable stuff around here. I thought I was bad with fire, but every single horse in Apollo's herds is a pyromaniac, and they're getting frisky." Ozzy stepped down from the chariot, and Icarus cracked the reins. The horses leaped for the sky, dragging the chariot and its waving red-headed teenage driver behind them. They almost cleared the clock tower, with one of the wheels knocking off a couple of shingles.

Ozzy looked at the crowd and said casually, "Nice kid. A little too enthusiastic, but he's young. Cos with the territory. Can you believe it's his first day driving one of Apollo's chariots?"

Suzette ran forward and hugged him tightly. Worrying about him and pretending not to worry had worn her out. "So glad you're back. I was worried it was going to be another thing like getting lost in the smoke."

He hugged her back, "It was a little tricky, but I figured it out. And I brought you back so seeds for a new strain of wheat. Should brew up nicely. The beer they had in the village was pretty unique. So was the bread."

Ben looked at the departing chariot, zooming into the sky and disappearing over the horizon. "You got a ride from soone with their learner's permit?"

Ozzy laughed, "Not quite. The kids a natural when it cos to managing heat and keeping the horses under control. We had a long talk about how I can manage my furnace better. But he needed so pointers when it ca to driving a chariot. Teaching Icarus to drive counted as one of my labours. Completing those earned a ride ho. Take a look." He shared the system ssage with his friends and Marceline.

Ozzymandias Trollslayer has completed the following tasks for Apollo, Lord of the Elysian Fields and God of the Sun.

-Wrestled the Ur-Troll, Trostvarnax, breaking the troll's back and rendering his flesh to tallow.

-Harvested the Sun Wheat from the Elysian Fields while enduring their sweltering heat.

-Cleaned the barns of the Sun Lord and brought order to his herds.

-Saved a village of Apollo's followers from starvation.

-Laid a feast on Apollo's table that delighted the Sun God.

-Created a new recipe in Apollo's honor: Rib Sandwich of the Dawn. (Boneless elysian beef on sunwheat bread with a tangy troll sauce.)

-Taught Icarus to drive.

For completing a Hero's Labours, Ozzymandias Trollslayer is rewarded with the following: 5 Radiance, appropriate parting gifts, and the Sun God's Blessing.

Ben read the announcent and grinned. "You thought you were getting a quiet walk ho, and instead got seven jobs. Seems right for a contract worker."

Rolly sniffed, "Squirmie and I are curious about the sll coming from your bag."

Ozzy patted his bag, "Good nose, as usual. I brought ho so sandwiches for lunch. But anyone without so good fire resistance or a strong stomach may want to pass. Probably deadly."

This tale has been pilfered from . If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.

Rolly licked his lips. "Worth it."

Marcy elbowed the Shepherd in the ribs. "Don't think about feeding your face quite yet. You promised pancakes!"

"So I did, and the first batch is waiting for you in the tavern with plenty of maple syrup. Who's hungry?"

Everyone was. Over twenty newly risen players, contract workers, and god-emperors in training made their way to the tavern. Vern was vastly disappointed to find out that pancakes with maple syrup were not on his special nu. "This is unacceptable! I'm wasting away to nothing!"

The statent brought snickers or outright laughter from the entire tavern. Marcy had to admit that he was looking slightly better. Two weeks of training, abuse, and daily deaths were taking their toll on Vernon's waistline, compounded by so of the potions Suzette was feeding him in his food. Maybe in a year, he might actually be in shape. She hoped to hell he wasn't still her problem then. Or if it was, the compensation was equal to putting up with him. She noticed a few new faces entering the tavern and waved them over.

"Varsil! Grab a seat and so grub, and bring your crew. I want to catch you up to speed."

The big barbarian woman from AC HR grinned widely, "Don't have to call more than once to a al. I rember the food here being total crap, but that slls great." As she stuffed three pancakes into her mouth, she turned to stare at Ozzy, and a toss of her head got the attention of her crew. "Beefcake at 7 o'clock, girls. One you'll rember."

Marcy saw the predatory looks from the other won. She sighed inwardly. Adults could be so childish. "He's off limits, Varsil."

"Oh, and why is that? Looks like there's a lot of him to go around."

"Because I need you to get stuff done, and you have so special training coming up. Trust , you do not want to tangle with the Butcher."

Filthyfoot nudged Varsil, "Ha! Varsil here would tangle with him at the drop of a loincloth. Most of us would, but she took the blue ribbon last ti and gets first crack at a return engagent." The other mbers of Varsil's band agreed and began discussing their preferences for certain types of n. They were interrupted by Suzette, balancing a large platter carrying plates stacked high with pancakes and pitchers of beer to the table.

"Here's breakfast. You folks look hungry. Oh, not for you, Marcy. Rolly says he has a special stack coming for you. He's taking his pancake promise very seriously."

The Vixens dove into their breakfast, happy not to be eating cold trail rations. The beer disappeared before the pancakes were half done. Rolly showed up with a stack of pancakes for Marcy, which didn't look any different from the others. She shrugged and started eating, only looking up when the Vixens started making strange noises. All of them were pale and clutching their stomachs.

Suzette noticed and yelled at them, "Are you sick? I swear, there must be so bug going around in Hurlsford. Half the people showing up have the stomach flu. Run outside; I don't want to be cleaning up after you."

Marcy didn't want to see that, either. "You heard her, go find soplace safe until you feel better." They made it as far as the courtyard before the first of them fell over, followed by the rest, with Varsil enduring the pain long enough to see the headstones start appearing. Marcy had followed, curious, and so had Suzette. Varsil turned and glared at the barmaid.

"You poisoned us? Why?"

She smiled at the big barbarian. "I'm setting boundaries. After all, you work for AC, and so do the contract workers. Your indecent suggestions might be construed as sexual harassnt. I'm saving Baron Billy a big hassle. What if soone notified the AC HR departnt? Think of it as the start of your special training. Today's lesson is that you can never have enough poison resistance. We'll work on that, assuming you learn how to behave." She snapped her fingers, and Varsil fell over, dead.

Marcy stared at her, "Damn, girl. That was harsh."

Suzette shrugged, "It's not the first ti they've gone after Ozzy, and so people need to be kicked by a mule to have a lesson get into their skull. Or in this case, a pinch of Iocain powder. We're on a schedule and don't need distractions and drama. This was a quick, hard lesson on where the line is drawn."

"Are all those pancakes on the table poisoned?"

"Yes, but don't worry, Rolly will eat them. It takes a lot for him to get any new experience in Poison Resistance."