His expression grew grave imdiately after.
They had just passed through the Master-level Gu ritual and had already been pushed to their very limits.
They needed to get past the Sage-level Gu rituals to reach the chamber.
"A battlefield of Martial Sages."
It was difficult to describe just how difficult this feat would be.
"But maybe…" his eyes grew grave. "If we survive…"
It wasn't impossible.
And yet, just because it wasn't impossible didn't an it was wise or prudent.
It was a risk that far exceeded any other that Rui had taken.
Fighting Sages in an isolated environnt was bad enough, but partaking in a free-for-all with other Sages in a death battle was a different matter entirely. That was a far fiercer competition.
"Even with Gigabrain…" His eyes grew more severe.
Not to ntion, he was extrely unwilling to use that technique in the Gu. Months unconscious in this hellhole was a death sentence, and he didn't want to burden Amare with such an extraordinarily difficult constraint.
On the other hand, getting past the Sage-level Gu ritual was absolutely necessary if he wanted to et the Demon of Asmodeous and compel the peak Sage. It was a risk that he would need to take if he wanted to achieve his goal and mission.
And yet…
His eyes shifted towards the sleeping Amare with affection and care.
His gaze grew concerned.
She was strong.
Truly strong.
And she only grew stronger with every second of each day she lived.
She was truly an extraordinary person.
And yet…
"I don't want her to bear the burdens of my commitnts."
He didn't want her to suffer the consequences of his decision.
He could sohow see himself just barely surviving a Sage-level battlefield to the very end.
Just barely.
However, he truly couldn't see him surviving and protecting her. Even if she was strong, even if she had an endless amount of untapped potential in her mories and principles that she had yet to master, he couldn't see both of them surviving. The Gu rituals at the Upper Realms had a much lower cut-off than those of the Lower Realms. A smaller percentage of the participants had to die for the rest to survive.
Naturally, the weakest would surely be targeted.
"In this case, ."
That was why he knew that surviving the Sage-level Gu ritual would be harder than any other feat he had ever set out to accomplish in his entire life. It would take every ounce of power he had gathered in his entire life.
His gaze returned to Amare.
If he took her with him, she would be the one targeted the most.
The very thought of it was profoundly heart-rending. He didn't feel even the slightest bit of personal anxiety.
He had been risking his life like a madman ever since Master Ceeran had told him about the trick of dying to the Sage Realm. He didn't feel anything over doing it once more, even if it was a greater risk than any other risk that he had ever taken his life.
And yet, when he thought about Amare taking that sa risk with him…
When he thought about her suffering even more than she already had…
When he thought about her dying…
CLASP
His hand flew to his chest as he felt a sharp pang of pain.
In his heart.
He couldn't allow it.
He would rather die than allow it.
It was in that mont that he finally understood.
He finally understood just how important she was to him. He finally understood the depth of how he cared for her.
He finally understood what she was to him.
He arrived before her sleeping form.
Her long, flowing brown hair was ssily spread across the humble bed they shared. Her soft, light snores drew an affectionate smile on his face.
"I love you."
More than two years together in their mission through humanity had culminated in a boundless love that was more important to him than almost anything in his entire life. She was the only person in the world who could stand by his side.
Almost. He leaned towards her slowly, as his lips softly and gently pressed into her forehead. "I love you and…"
His expression grew sorrowful.
Pained.
Guilty.
"…and I'm sorry."
He realized he cared more about her safety than the fate of all of human civilization.
He realized that he loved her more than he loved almost any other person in this whole wide world. The realization taught him more about himself.
It taught him more about just what manner of being he was. While his Martial Drive was the most powerful force that drove him forward, he ca to understand more about the forces that drove him as a cosmological entity.
Love.
Wonderlust.
Bonds.
People. A myriad of different forces constituted who he was.
He understood more about them than he ever did before.
He grew closer to the Enlightennt of Self
Closer to the Martial Soul.
Closer to the Sage Realm
Closer than he ever had before. His eyes opened.
Within their depths was a profoundly deep understanding of just what manner of being he was.
For the first ti in a long ti, he felt a sense of tranquility within him.
More than fifteen years ago, the Divine Doctor had almost broken him.
He had almost broken him with the truth.
The truth about his so-called reincarnation.
Since then, an existential dread had eaten away at him from within. It had eaten away at his mind, heart, and soul.
The only tis he had truly found peace from it was in his Martial Path. Adaptive Evolution, whether it was training or fighting, was his only reprieve.
But now, for the first ti since that horrible day, he finally felt a sense of tranquility that he had never felt in his entire life.
A kind of peace.
Silence within his soul.
When he closed his eyes, he could almost see the Sage Realm.
He gazed at Amare one last ti with all the love he had for her within his heart.
And then, he left.
He left her behind as he surged deeper into the depths of the Gu.
-
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