The Unwanted Prince of Prussia Chapter 187: News From the Author

Alright, my loyal and slightly concerned readers—

Do not lose heart over the temporary famine of chapters. The well is not dry. The writer is simply… occupied.

The past few days I have been working extensively with what I shall politely call small chaotic goblins—also known as children—and a handful of adults who have chosen very questionable hobbies involving substances. This, believe it or not, is part of my actual profession.

On top of that, I have been doing what I always end up doing: engaging in long conversations about politics, religion, philosophy, the aning of existence, and why everyone else is wrong. These discussions tend to consu hours. Sotis entire evenings. Occasionally small pieces of my soul.

So yes—I have been busy.

Life has a habit of doing that.

However! In the near future, I will have several glorious weeks of mostly free ti. And when that happens, chapters will rain down like artillery in 1914—except far less destructive and hopefully more entertaining.

To make up for the delay, I offer you a small gift.

Below is sothing I wrote a few years ago—an idea fragnt from one of my earlier story concepts. The premise is simple:

Imagine a child trying to understand sothing vast—life, existence, creation—and attempting to summarize it in their own words.

It is, therefore, a text slightly… lost in translation.

If you would like to see how life ca to be—from one small human's slightly confused but earnest perspective—

Then read on.

---

The Holy Book of Mankind.

"In the beginning there was only nothingness where God slept happily. But God had a problem, and while it was true that life was good and he was happy to be, to exist in this nothingness and all that ca with it, the problem was that he was alone. He was the only one to enjoy it all, to enjoy existence.

And so in his pure goodness and his want to share and not to hold the joy of existence all to himself he decided to say, let there be light. And so light ca, it pushed back the darkness. And under its brilliant light the first kingdom was made.

And within this kingdom that God nad heaven, 8 archangels were made within his perfect image. 4 were made to be in the forms of won, fair skinned, gentle, kind, empathetic, soft beings more beautiful than anything else to be before or after them. They were beings ant to bring balance and joy to heaven, to keep their partners, the four archangels in the forms of n in check.

For these four n were strong, logical, courageous, assertive and independent beings with a natural instinct to protect the weak, to protect their won, to love them and to see god's kingdom be free from harm. They were the protectors and rulers of the land. They were to keep everything in check while being guided by their softer and more emotional counterparts who made sure that these n's power was not used wrongly.

With this done, god then set his sights on creating a ho for the archangels to live and prosper in. Within the kingdom of heaven God created a perfect land, a vast land full of fertile soil enough for all. White shores surrounded that land and the most beautiful of all sun rises brought with it warmth and life to it all. And in this land a city of pure white and of gold was made. It held high walls around it that reached to the skies, and in the very heart of the city there stood a singular tall tower of light.

Created by god, the tower of light shined like a beacon far across the land. But it was no re beacon of light, no, it was a source of life and warmth. And from it's pure white light the first angels ca to existence in the thousands. Angels that were to be the inhabitants of heaven and the lessers of their superiors, the archangels.

During this early ti of creation, the archangel nad Lucifer, who was the first of the archangels to be made and the wisest of them all, took upon himself a task. He decided to go beyond heaven itself in search of life elsewhere. For Lucifer unlike the others had his doubts against god. His wisdom though great had led him to question his very creator and all that was around him. He reasoned to himself, that surely god the creator was not the only one. Surely there were others, others that held this magical power of creation, or maybe there were even better beings like him out there in the emptiness of the void beyond heaven.

The others feeling concerned by this turned to god for guidance. They hoped god could convince Lucifer to not go and that this journey was but a fools errand, for there was only one God and one creator. But god was silent, for he was in a state of slumber, in a state which he rested to recover his mighty powers once more. For in his creation of all that was, he had used great portions of his power, and so he now remained still and silent, gathering his powers once more.

And so the Archangels could do nothing but watch as Lucifer left heaven, leaving them to rule without him. And so ti passed, heaven grew, the angels reproduced amongst one another and the relationships between the Archangels also grew closer.

Then one day Lucifer returned from the darkness of the void. And no more was he the sa being of perfection and light. No, he had changed into an angel of darkness, much more imperfect than his own brethren. His skin was pale, eyes had beco darker and hair longer than any others, even his deanour had beco strange and gloomy. Still despite this the others nonetheless welcod him back with open arms.

However all was no more as it once was. Lucifer was alone, the one ant to guide him and keep him in check had turned to the Strongest, most stoic and domineering of all the Archangels, Imperiel. While the other two held but one partner, Imperiel now held two of the archangel beauties on both his sides.

Looking upon Imperiel sitting there with the two beauties fawning over him, Lucifer was enraged. And in his rage Lucifer began to change. His wings turned to crimson black and eyes red like blood and teeth beca like that of a beasts. And in his rage he then challenged Imperiel to a duel.

Hearing this the Archangels were in shock, except for Imperiel. He stood up with no readable expression on his perfect face and rely, without any hesitation accepted Lucifer's challenge.

And so the first duel and first conflict began. Imperiel wore his armour of light and gold and stood with a mighty sword of light in one hand and in the other he held an impregnable shield ready to face down Lucifer.

Lucifer on the other hand wore a sinister armour of darkness, and held a spear of fire on his back and a bow of crimson in his hands. And unknown to all, Lucifer had hidden within his sinister armour of darkness a hidden blade coated in black poison.

And so in the highest peak of heaven, atop the brilliant tower of light the first duel then began. With the power of light and good at his side Imperiel fought fairly with skill and might. While Lucifer used devious tricks and trickery to fight, he held no honour or remorse against his brother. No, Lucifer intended to kill and so he almost did.

Poisoned and wounded Imperiel stood at deaths door, but through sheer determination, fate and a want to protect his won he fought on. Seeing Imperiels strength the archangels were taken a back, just like Lucifer was.

The deceitful Lucifer shook in fear at the sight of Imperiel, though he didn't admit it out loud. But all could clearly see him faltering, Lucifer had begun to doubt himself and in his doubt he accidentally created an opening for Imperiel to strike. And so with one heavy strike Imperiel shattered Lucifer's spear into pieces, and sent him flying off of the tower with one devastating kick as he roared out in victory.

This is my Kingdom now, brother!

And in that mont as he fell, he looked up only to see those won worriedly running to Imperiels sides. They looked up at his tall figure with tears in their eyes and quickly began to heal him. While Lucifer got nothing but a devious smile from Imperiel who did nothing to stop his fall, in fact nobody did. All he gained were looks of pity from the others who still looked down upon him.

So in anger and alone Lucifer plumted hard to the ground below where all the lesser angels could see. His black wings were now damaged and broken. He could not fly, he could rely watch from down below as God awoke and gave the seven archangels the right to cast judgent upon him.

And so the first judgent was given. Lucifer was banished and cast out from heaven, never to return unless he repent by asking God for forgiveness for his sins. But this rely enraged the fallen angel even more, he spat on heavens floor and swore vengeance upon them all.

Seeing this God was displeased, and so he ordered Imperiel to rip out his wings so that he would never again return to heaven. Imperiel though would have liked to end Lucifer then and there, but god was too good and rciful and let the first demon go.

So Lucifer left, but as he did he found sothing. On the edges of heaven, in a field of flowers close to the white shores he saw a lesser female Angel and her young daughter. And in them, the deceiver saw a sinister opportunity.

Using his deceitfulness he tricked them to fly him to the edge of heaven. Where he then attacked, he took the young angel girl hostage and like so, he forced the two to follow him into the emptiness of the void.

For a while this all went unknown, until the distressed father of the young angel ca to tell the Archangels of his missing daughter and wife.

And so led by Imperiel a great search for the two began. Not one corner of heaven was left unchecked. For a ti they flew around searching, but found nothing in heaven and so they turned to god for guidance.

Using his endless wisdom God was able to find traces of the three, but he knew not where they were now. They had vanished into the void beyond his sight.

Hearing this Imperiel was enraged, he could guess what had happened to the two angels and knew who the third one with them was.

And so under his leadership the angels massed up into a mighty army of tens of thousands and with Imperiel in the lead they went into the void.

Worried that they would never find their way back to heaven. God then decided to create the stars for them to navigate and earth on them for them to land on and rest. And so the void began to fill up little by little with God's creations. Ti passed, Angel colonies were made along the way, and then after an unknown amount of ti they finally found it.

There amidst the black void was a land not created by God, but by evil sorcery that had shrouded it all in clouds of darkness. Still Imperiel unafraid of this swept down, and past the wall of clouds that he imdiately could feel to be poison.

And there below the clouds he found a dark land, with dark soil, dark mountains and 666 volcanos that were all shooting out balls of fire that rained down from the skies, and ash that poisoned the land and covered the world in eternal darkness.

It was a truly hideous and deadly land that was constantly assaulted by the flaming stones that the lands own raging volcanos were spewing forth. And in the center of it all, surrounded by mountains and with one large volcano in its center there was a single large black fortress. And around the black fortress there were many streams of burning magma, with but a singular black bridge of tal leading to the entrance of it.

Seeing this hideous black structure that was not of god's own creation, Imperiel sent his armies forth to destroy it. But as the army of heaven got closer to it, they were ambushed by hideous, red, bat-like creatures that spewed forth from thousands of caverns hidden in the black rocky land. They wore nothing more than rags and wielded nothing but crude weapons of simple hideous designs. And so the first war began between heaven and the land that would co to be known as hell.

During this first war heaven managed to pierce through hells defences, through the gates of Tartarus and down the seven layers of tornt, and finally into the last two layers of hell. All nine layers were breached and in the depths of hell Imperiel fought Lucifer the archdemon himself, or satan as he called himself.

No more could Imperiel even recognise Lucifer as his appearance was forever changed in the depths of hell and his own depravity. Now he was no more than a hideous beast of evil. A hideous mockery of Gods original perfect creation.

Satan was a being that had sohow within his rage and hatred managed to build this land of ash and fire for himself. And not only this, but the fortress as well. Although the angels did quickly co to find that this was not a re fortress, but a prison. Satan didn't seek to protect himself from heavens judgent, but to imprison his forr brethren there.

And so he had created the seven layers of tornt, each ant to be more wicked and cruel than the last. And each layer had a specific Archangel in mind according to his hatred towards them. While the eight layer was for his personal affairs and his generals he yet didn't have.

And the ninth layer was the place of his seat of power and pleasure. There he held the captive angels which he used to spawn his creatures that were untouched by god, and so they all were but ugly, hideous beings of pure evil, who rely lived for doing acts of evil, slaughter and the tornt of others.

But during this great war all had not gone well for Imperiels armies despite their great progress. For while angels upon their deaths would return to the tower of light, where they then would then be reborn a new. They could still be captured and made to suffer in turn and that was just what Lucifer had done.

During the fighting while the archangels had been distracted by the armies of hell and all it's monstrosities. Lucifer had managed to sneak up behind them and capture the most frail, feminine and weakest of all the Archangels, nad Juniel.

She tried to kick and scream, resisting Lucifer to the best of her abilities, but it was no use. The Archdemon dragged the poor Juniel deep into his lair. Where he did unspeakable things to her.

The war all in all had only lasted but for a few centuries, usually nothing for the immortal angels. But it was too long for the poor Juniel. When finally Imperiel and the armies of heaven had broken through to the ninth layer, it was already too late. Juniel and the other two angels were but a broken form of their forr selves and the 7 lords of hell had already been made.

In the ensuing battle the seven still young lords of hell were defeated, but not killed as they rely returned to hell's own twisted cycle of rebirth. Only through a cleansing in holy fire could such a demons soul be destroyed for good, but back then the Angels knew not of this.

However even with the seven lords gone, Satan the Archdemon himself still stood strong. All the while the angels fought he had stood and just watched, biding his ti and growing stronger with each pained death of his enemies.

Black horns in the form of a crown was now upon his head and his skin was but a red, red like blood, as were his newly found wings as well. He stood tall, much taller than any of his forr brethren and with a dark spear he attacked.

More powerful than ever before and with the Archangels weakened by the fight before. Satan managed to strike his forr brethren down one by one, until only one remained. Imperiel stood on the high ground with a stream of burning magma in between them. He had managed to set all the captive angels free and now they stood alone.

By now both were wounded and bloodied, and both hesitated in that mont. Seeing this Imperiel tried to reason with Lucifer, he tried to make him see reason and that he held the advantage here, he held the higher ground.

Lucifer said nothing, he readied himself for an attack. Imperiel still tried to stop him, don't do it, he yelled. But Satan didn't listen, he leaped over the burning magma and seed intent to land behind Imperiel.

But within his rage and anger he had made his intentions too obvious. Imperiel could see his forr brothers intent and so he cut him down with ease. Satan fell in pain and rage next to the river of fire where he cursed and raged at Imperiel as he slowly began to burn.

Imperiel saw no remorse in Satan and so he lifted up his sword intent to strike Satan down for good. But before he could, a cowardly worm like demon sprang out of the magma and blocked Imperiels strike.

Imperiel redirected his blade intent to strike this new foe down, but the depths of hell opened then and the reincarnated lesser souls of hell sprang forth once more. They were like a never ending tide that slowly forced him back, until he finally was forced to retreat out of hell.

So the first war then ca to an indecisive end. Both sides had suffered greatly and were now forced to halt their fighting and begin licking their wounds.

The angels newly born needed to learn to fight once more and better than before. Whiles the demons rely began to reproduce amongst one another, building their massive legions a new and far greater than ever before. They also began fortifying hell, so that no army of heaven could enter ever again.

God, the creator was greatly saddened by all that he had seen. In the beginning he had rely created the Archangels in hopes of him sharing his happiness of existence with others, as for him to be the only one in existence was but pure selfishness to him.

So to see that his pure wish of sharing his own happiness had turned to this, he no longer knew not what to do. So he fell into deep thought and watched as the armies of heaven and hell began a new war. In ti both sides numbers grew, their territories expanded, the war got larger and larger, but no where was there a sign to be seen of it ever coming to an end.

So God ca up with a new plan to see balance restored again to all of existence. And so a new plain of existence was made, one that was to challenge the old. It was a plain of existence where neither being of heaven nor hell could enter without his permission.

And so the mortal plain was made, a place where he wished to create creatures unlike the ones he had made before. And using this power of creation he then began creating many different worlds, with many different shapes and sizes. Worlds for his new creations to inhabit and prosper on.

Again and again he tried, billions upon billions of worlds and species of all kinds, shapes and sizes were made. But all of them failed, for none could live up to his vision and dream of creating the perfect being.

So he turned back to the beginning, he looked to the archangels that were made in his perfect image. He thought on where he had gone wrong and where he could improve his creation.

And so after a long ti of thought, God created Man. A mortal, weak and fragile being, but a being with great potential. For man's mortality was not a weakness, but the thing that would drive man to evolve and adapt, and in ti co to surpass even heaven and hell itself. And so the end war would begin, the war to end all wars and as such bring abouts gods intended perfect world.

To do this God gave man everything he could have possibly needed. He gave them a world of their own where they would rule and govern over all without anything to truly challenge them there. He even gave the first man a perfect paradise of his very own on earth, he gave him the garden of Eden which had it all, and he gave man a woman of his very own.

Adam and Eve they were called and they were alone. Surely like so nothing could go wrong, God thought. After all this ti there was no way Adam or Eve would be taken by soone else, since there was no-one to take either.

Lastly he gave the two a holy tree, the tree of life which stood in the center of Eden. Its fruit was bitter and lacking a bit in taste, but it gave them everything they could ever need, it gave them perfect health and a long life. And with this tree the first man and woman could live healthy and for long, while they oversaw their offspring take claim over all of earth.

But there was a catch to it all. For the tree was no re tree of life, it was the manifestation of gods own light. And as long as god kept overseeing that light the tree would continue to produce fruit and prosper for all eternity, keeping Eden in its paradise-like state.

So god thought he could keep man in check, hold his favour and see that man did as he had said. Which Adam and Eve did for a ti.

But one day it all changed, for unbeknownst to all another tree was made. In the land of hell where the dark lord Satan remained, he had created in secret a new seed for his own dark tree of sin. And within this seed he poured his cruelty, malice, greed, lust, hatred and all his sin. It was the one seed to corrupt them all, to see mankind fall into sin and temptation.

And finally to bring this seed to earth he had created the worm, or a snake as so called it. For while Heaven and Hell could not step foot upon this new land of man, there was one who could. A creation of a small demon worm and a heavenly butterfly that were both infused by his dark sorcery. And lastly by feeding the creation of this dark union the seed, Satan managed to send the hideous, cowardly dark worm that once had saved Satan from judgent, to earth.

And so hidden deep within Eden the worm had planted this seed to grow and bring sin and doubt of god to man. At first the worm had slithered its way to Adam, to trick and deceive him into eating from this dark tree of his. But Adam was no fool, no, he was a man and he would not be tricked so easily.

Failing in this, the worm then turned its attention onto the weaker of the two, Eve. It spewed kind, deceitful words like poison into the fragile and emotionally weak mind of Eve. It managed to make her see that that what was clearly evil for all to see, was maybe not like so.

But God was not blind and no fool. God had seen this and the hideous tree that was not of his making, residing in his garden of perfection, and so he banned any of such things forever being sent to his new plain of existence again. Then God sought to destroy the thing and uproot evil from this world before it ever got its claws on it.

To do this God had turned to Adam, for he, as the creator could not take or destroy. For God was the creator and not the destroyer.

Hearing God's will, Adam took a branch out of the tree of life and made himself an axe with it, a holy axe. An axe which he bathed in the water that the fruits of life held.

With this axe, he sought to uproot this vile tree and see its evil cleansed fully from this earth he inhabited. Determined and unaffected by the worms whispering please, Adam was determined and none could stop him from fulfilling Gods will, but.

But Eve who stood in front of Adam and the tree. Her mind weak, she was unable to hear god's plea. No, instead she tried to reason with Adam to not cut down the tree since it had not done any wrong. For how could one judge sothing that hasn't done anything?

To this Adam rely smirked. He was a good man, an honourable man and a good husband. He was willing to listen and tolerate her foolishness and debate her with logic, with reason.

He could see that the tree was of evil. Its roots were sucking the land around it dry, slowly poisoning and killing the garden to produce its own hideous fruit, that oozed out sothing dark and sickening. The trees bark was black like charcoal and a heinous dark energy floated around it, but the weak minded Eve couldn't see this, or she rely didn't want to see it. She only wanted to see good in everything, and so that's the only thing she saw, like a blind fool.

Still Adam tried and tried to debate her, but no logic or reason could get to her. Eve only spoke of feelings and emotions to him, and so Adam could only shake his head in disappointnt. Having heard enough Adam then firmly spoke. You've said your peace woman, and I have listened and not been convinced. Now, move aside.

He said this, but Eve protested. She looked innocently to Adam, used her womanly charms that she had learned from the sly worm and then she tried again. Please Adam, you can't. She pleaded and continued to question her man. Why does this tree not deserve life like all the other trees here? What has this tree done wrong and how can you say it to be of such evil before you have even tried it? For how can you no sothing to be bad if you have not tried it first?

Unmoved by the words, Adam rely laughed and commanded. Move aside woman. As he said this, he moved right in front of the weak woman, looked into her teary eyes and was about to make his move.

But before he could Eve pressed her soft body against his, placed her slender arms lovingly around his strong neck and asked. Do you not love ?

Taken a back by this, Adam knew not what else to say but an imdiate, yes. To which Eve showed a lustful smile, stood up upon her tiptoes and pulled him in close. Adam didn't resist and as the two kissed, sothing sweet and addicting entered his mouth.

Guided by the worm Eve had unknown to Adam or God hidden a piece of the vile fruit within her mouth, which she had already partaken in herself. And so deceived by Eve, Adam ate of the fruit that he shouldn't have.

Realising this too late, Adam was horrified by what Eve had done, but his love was too strong for her and the fruit too sweet and addicting. And so the two fell right into Satans trap, went against God and ate even more of the addicting fruit.

For the fruit was so sweet, juicy and cursed with addiction that ones one had one bite of, it was almost impossible not to have so more. And little by little the fruit began to change them. And like so the first addiction was born, an addiction that drove them from god, that drove them to see the bitter fruit of the tree of life as unappealing, and so mankind started to beco weak.

Their near perfect features began to fade, pain, sickness and old age ca and soon the tree of life began to wither away. For God had been so appalled by what he had seen that he turned away from man, unable to watch any more.

Lust, gluttony, greed, sloth, wrath, envy and pride began to grow within the two. They turned away from God's teachings and ways. And instead they let their most basic of instincts brew and take hold of them, as they slowly drove them further and further into sin.

But with the tree of life gone, Eden began to wither away and a desert began to take form in its stead. And in these final monts of Eden when their first child was born Eve cried out. Look isn't she just perfect.

And then Adam realised it, their child was indeed perfect, but they no longer were. He looked to the skies, thanked God and asked him for forgiveness.

But god remained silent, sorrow took hold of him, tiers ca to his eyes and he swore to never sin again for his child's sake. Looking around the dying gardens and his weak and suffering wife, he realised his wrongs and turned in rage to the tree of sin. A tierful frown ca upon his face, he looked to the axe that was still there at the root of the tree and took it.

Eve realising this pleaded to him once more and did as before, but this ti Adam didn't listen and he wasn't moved at all. He knew better, for he had learned and so with all his might he swung his axe and cut down the vile tree.

But as the tree fell, so too did his wife. Eve like a fool hadn't moved and was cut down in two. And as the tree burned in holy fire and Eve layed there coughing out blood next to it. Adam felt relieved, for he was now free, he had cut out the sin from the world with the tree, and cut it out from himself with the loss of Eve.

But it was not yet over, for one sinful creature still remained. Gripping his axe in fury, he then looked to the worm who stood on the sides hissing in joy at what it saw. Without hesitation Adam charged the worm and cut it in 7. Seven for everyone of his sins and then the worm burned.

Then Adam returned to Eve who now lay dead, tossed the holy axe upon her corpse and looked to the heavens as he said. Take them back, for I do not deserve them and I have sinned Father.

Moved by Adams strength to resist the temptation, and to see Adam realise his own faults, God returned his gaze back onto man and forgave Adam of his sins. And so Adam beca the first to repent, and through love and care for his daughter he did good. And as many years passed, and as he died within his bed surrounded by his many children. He was finally allowed to enter the halls of heaven. Where he beca one amongst the angels and joined the eternal war against Hell.

But all was not well. For Eve never made it to heaven. Her soul as tainted with sin as it was had been snatched by hell, imdiately after she had left the mortal plain. And so Eve beca a demon, a creature forgotten by god, a creature cursed into eternal tornt and made to fight as a slave against the armies of Heaven.

And just like with Eve, all had not gone well on earth. The offspring of Adam weren't doing so well. For in them were still small remnants of sin, which left them vulnerable to the whispers of hell.

The worm that was cut in seven, hadn't died fully. It was rely weakened and split in seven. Seven parts which carried the words of hell and led n away from heaven. Although God now hopeful of man again continued to trust in them and guide them away from hell.

So in ti God's plan began to be fulfilled, as man slowly multiplied and Adams offspring began to grow and spread across the land. But there was a problem, for whenever God spoke to man, his words were always misunderstood or simply went unheard. For man was too full of sin, too weak to the seven sins deceitful whispers and too blind to him.

Because of this different beliefs and interpretations of god's words began to erge. So even without hearing even a whisper of god's words just began making up their own stories of what they thought God was, as they began to worship false things.

And so as the number of beliefs grew and man steered further and further from the truth. Sin grew, conflicts erged and with it all so too did the differences between mankind grow.

Man no longer could even tell who was man and who was not as there were so many differences between them. Most had steered far away from that what Adam had once been, but luckily so still remained.

God being hopeful of these few that still resembled that what he had originally created, then gave them a gift. He gave them a way for them to hear the truth, to hear him and so God gave man a son of his very own. He found the purist of Adam's descendents, a young girl nad Mary and to her he summoned his own holy spirit in the perfect form of himself.

This form was not easy for god to maintain, so he was forced to work fast. He ca to Mary at night and made her submit and see his greatness. And so the once a virgin Mary beca pregnant and she rejoiced. For many nights she cried out in sadness, most likely sadness from seeing god's holy spirit go. For it was a spirit that for sure brought her great joy that all won would have envied. And with tiers in her eyes she cried out to the skies his na, Ooh, Jesus, why. And so after so ti Jesus Christ was born of the pure holy maiden Mary Christ.

It was in fact the 25th of December that he was born. Devastated by this, Mary's unfaithful husband to be, not believing that Jesus was the making of god and not of so neighbourly man, said to Mary then. Well, Mary Christmas to you. And then he left and was never seen again.

For a mont Mary cried and the winter seed dark. But drawn to the rumours of Jesus's birth and the boys natural born strength and visible 8-pack abs, 3 wise n ca with gifts of plenty.

In the center of the three there was the old, a bit chubby, but wise Santa Claus. With his persuasion he brought the two other wise n, and with his great intellect he imdiately knew Jesus to be the son of God and a good boy. And so the day of the 25th was forever rembered as a Mary Christmas and a ti of Joy.

So ti went on and from the first mont Jesus learned to speak, he began to drop bombs of wisdom upon all. The first of which was his distressed mother, and the other was a big man who broke into their ho in hopes of robbing her, and possibly even ravaging her as well.

Jesus seeing this had then calmly stood up in his crib and with a calm expression on his infant face said. Why must you rob Mary to gain her wealth, when you could instead Marry Mary and gain even more for yourself like so.

The words made sense and so the man was convinced, but Mary wasn't. So Jesus looked to Mary and spoke. Why resist? His an understanding man, and you are a lonely woman, this is but natural, is it not? After all real love is real, it doesn't lie, cheat or make you feel unwanted. True love eases worries and doesn't create them, and in this I see all these good things taking place. So open up Mom, open your legs and accept his love. If you don't believe , then believe in God for he has spoken through .

Hearing this the two were stunned, for they had never heard such wisdom. And in that mont the man said. So be it, as he looked to Mary. And Mary said, An, and like so Jesus made two enemies into lovers. All were happy and the sounds of peace were brought into his humble ho.

And so despite never asking for it Jesus had found in this man a protector and a father, while Mary found love once more and happiness.

Later in life as Jesus grew, so too did his teachings and followers grow in numbers as well. From all across the land people of all ages and walks of life began following him and his wise teachings despite him never asking for it.

None simply could resist being drawn to his large muscular figure that spoke such wisdom. His words helped many and his ways simply just worked.

For instance to the fisher with no fish within his net, Jesus had said. Only the dead stay still, but the living go where it is best to go. So watch, learn, adapt and go there where the fish go and you will be able to catch them there. Here let show you the way, as God once thought it to .

To the wealthy man who helped those in need, he said. While it is true that by helping others we help ourselves. But help them too much and you not only cause harm to yourself, but you also harm them. So give onto them only that what he need the most and no more, and the rest you can teach him to get himself, and so all will be happy and well.

To the old man with weak legs, he said. If sothing within you is weak, then train that sothing, so it becos strong. If it is your legs, then train those legs like I do and they will beco strong. And if though believe not then, though ought to look at my manly muscular legs and thou will see I speak no lie, but the truth as God speaks it to .

To the lost man, he said. If you're lost, then first ask why and from where you ca and you'll find your way. If that is not enough, then follow the path of life and its cool waters, or just follow and I will show you the way, just as God has shown it to .

To the young won who fought amongst one another for his attention. To them he said, fight for do not and show such want in the open please don't. For ye should love one another equally as God loves you all and I do. So co to my house, the door is open to you all and I have much to show and gift one and all.

And so they all followed him, and began calling him master, teacher, or simply Jesus the son of god, the prophet despite him never asking to be called so or ever proclaiming himself to be such.

Jesus even walked across the seas in search of those in possible need. And so he thought and healed one and all who were willing. He taught the sons of Napoleon how to make wine, he showed the people of Aikido how to fish, the people of baguette were shown how to make the best bread, the Romans he showed the way of the pizza and so much more.

But despite this all, many held doubts towards him. As the things he spoke of went against the teachings of their false gods, that most were nothing but wrong interpretations of the true words of god.

Then one day a supper was served. Jesus had gathered all of his most loyal of followers for it, who were twelve thousand strong. He alone had poured his blood sweat and tiers to make it all from them, from the sheer kindness of his holy heart.

But as Jesus drank from his cup, poison seeped into his veins. The cup fell, he stood and coughed out blood. Eleven thousand followers gasped in shock, but a thousand didn't, for this was all according to their plan.

The Romans, the great makers of Pizza had unknown to Jesus been corrupted by the seven devils. They were made to believe Jesus was no true son of God, but a false profit.

So the Romans with their huge sums of gold, and promises of land had bribed these thousand followers of Jesus into turning against him. And these thousand were all led by the unfaithful Judas of Israel.

Judas in his misguided ways believed that he and his followers were the real ones chosen by god, not Jesus. He thought Jesus to be a deceiver and so he took the money of Ro and betrayed Jesus.

But weakened though Jesus was, he was not defeated. His knowing eyes imdiately landed upon Judas, who looked to Jesus in fear. And as Jesus went to him, the man began to weep and pray, asking him and God for forgiveness for his sins.

From Jesus the man had indeed learned well the ways of repentance. And so before all his shocked followers Jesus grabbed Judas by his collar, Looked down on his pitiful face and with a smile he said. Worry not, for you are forgiven.

Judas breathed a sigh of great relief, thanked God and then before all, Jesus raised his right fist, smashed Judas head in, causing it to explode and paint the table of their once peaceful supper with red and brains. And so all the leaders of Jesus followers were then stained by the forgivens blood and they rejoiced for God's eternal rcy.

And then the drums of Ro began to beat. For it was not yet over, the Romans had co with their endless armies and eleven thousand and one crucifixes. They ant to make a mockery of Jesus and his loyal followers.

Their march made the ground shake like an earthquake was coming, only getting ever stronger the closer it got. Buildings far away shook and crumbled. The Roman numbers were so great and army so vast that their marching feet turned green forests and plains into sand. Rivers were drunk dry and nothing but sand was left in their wake, even the bones of that what they ate were no more.

Despite this, Jesus walked and stood before them and said. Is this all of them, hahaha?

Seeing Jesus laughing in the face of this great army, his followers couldn't believe it and so one said. But my Lord there are too many of them, we will never win. We must retreat when we still can and live to fight another day.

To this Jesus rely showed a smile and said. No, I will do no such thing. I will fight them and I will win. For I will die before my defeat and fight for as long as I breathe, so that I will always win and never lose. But you will retreat and live on to fight another day. For you already know that what I know and so I am no longer needed here. My destiny is here, but your is elsewhere. So go now and spread my words to all and rember for all eternity. Rember this scen and most of all rember the great lonely standing against these n.

Hearing this the followers knew they heard sothing great, but couldn't quite yet understand it and so Jesus turned to them and finally said. This is gods will, deus vult.

And so with nothing but his bare fists Jesus leaped into the fray and so the great battle that would last a total of seven days began. As Jesus fought, his followers retreated to carry on his ssage and spread the word so all could hear. And as Jesus fought he forgave all he struck, as he said. You are forgiven.

In the end Jesus died because of man's sin, and as he did he forgave them all as well, but it was never man that truly killed him. But the poison that the seven demons themselves had gifted onto the Romans who in turn gave it to Judas.

And as for Judas's followers, they were mostly made to repent as Judas did, but so escaped and went into exile to await their chosen ti that they believed that their false god would bring them.

So ti went on once more, and in ti Jesus's followers managed to overthrow the Romans beliefs with their words of wisdom. And so a kingdom of god and of the followers of Jesus was made, but it sadly didn't last thanks to the influence of the seven sins.

So more ti passed, mankind advanced, beca stronger, but never managed to totally unite under one nation of god or in the belief of the real God.

Humanity beca so divided that their division began to threaten the well being of the earth itself. The end of man seed near and all was about to be lost.

So God though still saddened by the loss of Jesus decided to gift mankind a new being in his own image. He gifted mankind a new son by enhancing one of Jesuses only descendents with God's own seed, and from that seed that was planted within a beautiful young woman once more the Emperor of mankind was born.

Taller, stronger, wiser, and devoid of any weak feelings of compassion. He did what he had to do, and made all of mankind bend to his will.

So humanity went to the stars and they lived happily ever after. The end."