King's Landing. The Red Keep. 298 AC.
Lady Sansa Stark.
"We rarely value what is near us until we have lost it." Father said that to us once, when I was quarreling with Arya and Jeyne. I never gave his words a second thought, taking them for another dull lecture. Now, left alone among enemies, I missed every mber of my family. Only the presence of Bran and Jeyne gave any relief from the hollow words and senselessly cruel acts that surrounded . Winterfell, my ho, had always felt to like a grey and dreary place. My mother, Lady Catelyn Stark, born a Tully, used to speak often of her holand, and I took it all on faith and dread of the South, of knights and tournants and fine gowns. For the sake of that dream I spent whole days learning to be a true lady.
When the news ca that I was to be the wife of the future king, my joy knew no bounds. Even my sister's teasing faded into the background. In my mind I was already the wife of a great man, the one who would give him an heir and many small children besides. A pity it was nothing more than a foolish girl's daydream.
Arriving in King's Landing had been like a dream: the royal family, the knights, the tournants, the balls. Prince Joffrey was better than anything I had ever imagined, Queen Cersei received warmly, and King Robert watched the two of us with shining eyes. Then Father sailed away, and everything began to fall apart. King Robert died. His brothers raised their banners against his son. Axel Arryn, an old friend of both our families, refused to carry out the will of the new king and left the capital. Things grew worse still when Father sided with the grim Stannis instead of the kind son-in-law he had in King Joffrey. After that I was treated with coldness and suspicion, for I was a traitor's daughter.
I blad Father, Mother, my brothers, everyone who stood in the way of my happiness as Joffrey's queen and the future lady of the Seven Kingdoms. Dozens of letters sent to my father and brother, pleading with them to co to their senses and not ruin what I had built, went unanswered. More nights than I could count I cried into my pillow, praying to the gods that my family would see reason. That was how I thought, right up until the mont my own foolishness cost dozens of good people their lives. One night, n sent by my father ca to spirit away from the Lannisters, and my own actions had warned the Red Keep's garrison ahead of ti.
The next day, whatever faith I had held in mine and Joffrey's love was turned to ash. The new king showed his true face. I have not been able to forget it since. The thick stone parapet ran along the outer edge of the wall, with arrow slits set into it every two yards for the crossbown. The heads had been placed between the slits, driven down onto iron spikes so that they faced the city. I knew every one of them. Septa Mordane, who had taught what it ant to be a true lady. Rosie the cook, who slipped lemon cakes behind everyone else's backs. Jon the stable-hand, who had taught to ride. Every one of those people had played so part in my life, and now they were dead because of my stupidity.
Joffrey was a sadist, a true monster, and my suffering was not enough to satisfy him. We went back to the square, where twenty-four surviving Northerners knelt in a row. For one brief mont I felt relief so overwhelming it was unlike anything I had known before, that soone had survived that slaughter, but the mont passed quickly. He had them executed one by one and made watch. No matter how I pleaded, how I prostrated myself at his feet and promised him anything I could think of, he only laughed. I saw the contempt in the eyes of people I had grown up with. They despised for what I had done. My closest friend, Jeyne Poole, cursed in the mont before her execution. When they dragged my bastard sister toward the scaffold, the last one left alive, I had no tears remaining. I could not even look at her, knowing full well what I would see in her eyes.
I had never been so glad to see Queen Cersei as I was in that mont. She stepped in at the last instant and put an end to the madness. She spared Elena's life on the condition that I would do whatever she asked, or my sister would suffer for it. I agreed without hesitation, because I could not bear to lose another mber of my family. Bran and I were valuable hostages, too useful to kill, being legitimate children of a great lord, which could not be said for Elena. Bran had beco an honorary prisoner, permitted to train in the yard, though at least four red cloaks followed his every step. Elena remained my lady-in-waiting, but the warmth between us was gone beyond recovery.
I had long since learned to push my feelings into a far corner. I could be mocked, insulted, struck, humiliated. Better than little Brandon. I still rembered the mont my brother tried to stand up for and was cut down by the king's toadies for it. I had to be strong for my family.
"Your Grace, whatever my traitor father has done, I am no part of it, you know that. I beg you..."
"Not that wretch, your scheming brother!" Joffrey leveled a crossbow at my face. "Ser Lancel, tell those assembled what has happened."
"Your brother, resorting to dark magic and conspiring with the Freys, fell upon Ser Jai Lannister's army with a host of wargs at the walls of the Twins. Thousands of good n were slaughtered in their sleep before they could raise a sword. And after the slaughter the Northerners held a feast where they devoured the bodies of the slain."
"Have you anything to say?" Nothing. Better to stay silent. Seeing that no answer was coming, Joffrey gave his order.
"Boros. ryn. Leave her face alone. I want it to stay pretty." The blow from Boros ca imdiately. A steel-gauntleted fist drove all the air from my lungs. I doubled over in pain while hands seized by the hair and a sword was drawn. For one horrible instant I thought he was going to cut my throat, but the blade struck flat across the thighs.
I cried out and tears ca. I watched everyone else observe my beating with complete indifference, without a trace of pity in any of them. Only Bran tried to help , but Baelish held him firmly and was saying sothing in his ear. Thank the Seven that Lord Baelish had promised to look after my brother and keep him from doing anything rash. At so point my dress was torn, leaving nearly bare.
"What is the aning of this?!" The Imp's voice cracked like a whip across the room.
While I tried to gather myself and catch my breath, the king and his Hand were arguing about sothing. It was only then that I realized belatedly that soone had draped a piece of cloth over , covering my nakedness. When I raised my eyes I saw it was my sister, who was looking at in that mont with pity. On the half-man's order, Elena lifted to my feet and led out of the throne room. She moved as though sleepwalking, and only Lord Tyrion's voice pulled her from it.
"I apologize for my nephew's behavior." His voice was as agreeable as he could make it, but I had long stopped trusting that. "Tell the truth. Do you wish to end this betrothal?" Yes, it was among the most heartfelt desires I had.
"I am loyal to King Joffrey. He is my only love." This was a den of enemies. There was no telling the truth here.
I was sent to my bedchamber in Maegor's Holdfast, where a stout red-haired maester nad Frenken examined my injuries. He spread balm over the red welts on the backs of my legs, then gave a sleeping draught mixed with honey to make it easier to swallow.
"Sleep a little, child. When you wake, all of this will seem like a bad dream."
No it will not, you foolish man, I thought. But I drank the draught all the sa, and slept.
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