He was relieved after leaving the Qin family’s ho, but also utterly exhausted.
izi’s parents hadn’t given him a hard ti, yet his heart felt heavy. ’It turns out I really can’t afford to marry izi.’
When the topic of the betrothal gift ca up, he had seen the helpless look on Gou Dan’s mother’s face clearly, and his own heart ached.
Even if the Qin family didn’t ask for a single coin, it wouldn’t be right. He wasn’t worthy of them entrusting their daughter to him like that. And besides, how could he marry izi with his family’s three dilapidated rooms?
The moonlight seed to have dimd. ’Maybe it’ll rain tomorrow,’ he thought, noticing a faint layer of clouds gathering in the sky.
He didn’t want to go ho, so he found himself back outside Li Changxing’s courtyard.
The courtyard was pitch-black and silent. Most of the villagers were asleep by this hour. ’Should I wake Changxing? What could he do even if he heard about it? Can I keep bothering him with my problems?’
He was lost in thought when a dark figure suddenly appeared at the gate, startling him. But then he heard Li Changxing call out, "Brother Changming!" It turned out he had been waiting for his cousin all along.
Li Changming’s heart settled. Instead of entering the courtyard, he squatted down across from Li Changxing and let out a heavy sigh.
But Li Changxing yanked him up, pulling him into the house. "Do you want people to overhear you? Why are you sighing? Did the proposal fail?"
Li Changming shook his head—not caring if Li Changxing could see him in the dark—and said softly, "It succeeded. They told to have a matchmaker formally propose."
Li Changxing asked in surprise, "Then why are you sighing?"
Li Changming didn’t answer his question. Instead, he asked, "Changxing, do you think I shouldn’t have pursued izi? Tonight, I’m starting to think I really shouldn’t have. My family’s three dilapidated rooms are already crowded with my parents and Changling. Where would she even live if I married her? I can’t even afford a betrothal gift. Her mother doesn’t want one, but she’s worried that if they don’t ask for anything, people will wonder why izi is so cheap, marrying a poor bastard like for nothing."
Li Changxing fell silent too.
He had been the one to arrange this match, and he honestly hadn’t thought this far ahead.
He just felt that Brother Changming was a good man who deserved to get married. But hearing him put it like that, it did seem like izi would be getting the short end of the stick.
However, he wasn’t the type to get discouraged easily. He carefully asked Li Changming about what had happened at the Qin family’s ho.
After hearing the whole story, he said to Li Changming, "Brother Changming, if izi’s parents were being unreasonable, there’d be nothing you could do. But from what you’ve told , everything they said shows they’re considering your side of things. You shouldn’t be worrying at all; you should pull yourself together. Don’t worry about the betrothal gift. We can scrape one together. Since her family doesn’t care about the money, we’ll just do it for show. izi can bring it back with her later to repay everyone. As for the house, we might not be able to build a nice one, but can’t we build one with mud walls and a thatched roof? Once the farm work is done, we’ll make the adobe bricks ourselves and build a house. As long as you and izi work hard, and with her family helping out, your lives will probably be much better in just a few years."
Hearing his words, Li Changming felt his heart lighten considerably. "I was just confused," he said. "I only felt that I was letting izi down, and I was overco with guilt. You’re right. Since things have already co this far, if I don’t step up and take responsibility, won’t I be wasting all of izi’s feelings for ?"
Li Changxing said, "Exactly. Also, I think you should separate from your family. Have a proper talk with Uncle. Don’t be soft-hearted like a woman and worry about it being unfilial. If you’re poor, what damn good is just having a filial heart? Once you’re well-off, you can be as filial as you want."
The two cousins planned everything out in detail. By the ti Li Changming left, he felt much more confident.
anwhile, at the Qin family’s ho, after Li Changming had left, izi erged from her room with a troubled expression. She sat down silently beside her mother, her dazed look making her seem as if she had aged several years in an instant.
She had never worried about making a living, nor had she ever seriously considered the realities of daily life. She had always just obediently listened to her mother, learning this and doing that.
Tonight, hearing her parents discuss these matters with Li Changming, she suddenly realized that marrying him was not going to be simple. Even if her family didn’t look down on the Li Family, where would she live after marrying him? Even forgoing the betrothal gift was proving to be a problem.
She wasn’t afraid of hardship, but when she thought of the Li family’s three dilapidated rooms, his lazy father, his slow-witted brother, and his nagging, sharp-tongued mother, a sudden wave of fear washed over her.
When Gou Dan’s mother saw her daughter co out, she had originally intended to scold her a little, maybe say sothing like "you don’t listen to your elders, so you’ll suffer for it," but seeing the hesitant and fearful look on her daughter’s face, her anger vanished.
Her heart ached for her. She took her daughter’s hand and comforted her, "Changming is a diligent man, and you’re not lazy either. Once you’re married, you can live separately. With here to help you, things will turn out fine."
izi turned and looked at her mother seriously. "I know. I can endure hardship. Don’t you worry, Mother. I was just immature before. I’ve grown so old and still made you and Father worry all this ti."
She thought of Liu Xiaoi and Juhua. Whenever the two of them were together, they always talked about things like fields, chickens, and ducks. She used to laugh at them, saying they sounded like old farrs.
For instance, Juhua had asked Liu Xiaoi for sunflower seeds and then asked in detail how to plant them, eventually planting a few dozen along the edges of the fields. She had also gotten so chili seeds to plant, saying she was determined to harvest a lot of red chilies this year. ’Those must have been harvested by now,’ she thought.
Juhua had also taught Liu Xiaoi that the chicken and pig pens must be kept clean and cleared out often, otherwise the chickens could easily get sick. After the rice harvest, she told Liu Xiaoi to let the chickens into the paddy fields. It wasn’t just for them to eat the fallen rice grains, which was good, but the main thing was all the insects in the field. Eating insects made the chickens lay more eggs.
The two had also discussed tying strings to the chickens’ feet to keep them from running all over the place and getting lost.
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