Sen heard the words. He understood them on so level. He knew they were a threat, but they felt distant and epheral, like vague things seen through a fog. Hazy shadows that only served as distractions from the true matter at hand. The matter at hand being the horrifying transformation that the forr Soaring Skies Sect mber had undergone. The last ti Sen had seen Changpu, it was right after removing the man’s arm. He had, in a decision Sen found very dubious in hindsight, provided a healing pill to keep the other cultivator alive. But Changpu had still very much been a human being.
Until Sen heard the other man speak, he hadn’t been sure that it was Changpu. The face was similar but distorted. His jaw had widened. No doubt a necessity to accommodate the larger, sharper teeth that were exposed when the misshapen thing before him spoke. His eyes were a sickly, yellow color and seed to possess a faint luminescence. However, even with his enhanced vision, Sen couldn’t be sure if that was the case or just a trick of the light. Once-healthy skin had a mottled, gray sheen and, unless he was mistaken, Sen thought there were even so scales.
The man was bigger than he’d been, although even that looked painful. It looked as though so incompetent sculptor had layered clay on top of an existing statue, giving Changpu an almost bloated appearance. Of course, the biggest change was that the man had two arms again, even if only one of them looked remotely human. The other was a uniform gray that looked more like the hide of so spirit beast. There were definitely small scales on it. Sen could only assu that the changes he saw before him were a consequence of attaching that foreign limb to a human cultivator. Or, perhaps, the changes had co first in preparation. Whatever the order had been, the results were simply grotesque. Changpu had turned him into a mockery of humanity.
“By the heavens, man,” said Sen in a weak voice. “What have you done to yourself?”
Changpu gave Sen a disquieting smile, spread his arms wide, and said, “I did what you did. I grew powerful enough to get what I want.”
However, the seeming mont of happiness was swiftly replaced by fury.
“How dare you?” Changpu almost scread. “How dare you ask what I’ve done to myself. You did this to ! You mutilated , and then you didn’t even have the courage to let die.”
“I saved your life,” snapped Sen. “After you tried to steal from ! It was more rcy than you deserved.”
“Saved my life? You didn’t save . You condemned to live like a freak! A cultivator who couldn’t cultivate. No sect was going to take in a foundation formation cultivator who could never advance! And I had centuries of that to look forward to. Living as an outcast. Pitied by cultivators. Feared by mortals. rcy? rcy! That was no kind of rcy. That’s just a lie you tell yourself to feel righteous!”
A little piece of Sen worried that Changpu might be right that it was a lie he told himself to feel better about what he’d done. As for the rest of it, though?
“You could have found a life for yourself among the mortals if you tried. Any village would have been overjoyed to have a defender as strong as you still are. Missing arm or not. But I’m willing to bet you didn’t try, did you? No, not a great cultivator from the mighty Soaring Skies Sect. That would have been too much for your overdeveloped pride and boundless arrogance, wouldn’t it? And what need do I have to feel righteous?”
The way Changpu’s already deford face twisted at his words told Sen that he’d been right. The wayward cultivator hadn’t tried to find another life for himself. Not that Sen had really expected the man to try. It wasn’t in his nature. He was too much of a cultivator. Lowering himself to defending mortal villagers to secure a place for himself? Facing life without the power of a sect behind him to bolster his confidence? It was unthinkable to soone who had so clearly had never needed to truly fend for themselves in life. It was too hard. Cost too much. Demanded sacrificing all of that unearned pride and treating people he considered beneath him as having value.
If Sen had understood cultivators better when he’d fought with Changpu all those years ago, he probably would have killed him. Sen personally found the idea of giving up before he’d done everything that he could abhorrent. However, for Changpu, a swift death then truly would have been a kindness. With that one stroke of his jian, Sen had deprived the man of everything that gave his life aning. He’d even understood that, vaguely, at the ti, but he’d been too new to the world of cultivation. Now, a confrontation like this felt predictable. Almost inevitable. While putting in the effort to build a new life was too alien an idea for Changpu, revenge was perfectly aligned with his cultivator principles.
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“Still lying to yourself, I see,” snarled Changpu. “Do you think I don’t rember you? Do you think I don’t rember what you were like? Eyes sparkling with all those principles and convictions. You might look like the sa kind of ruthless bastard as the rest of us now, but I know better. Deep down inside, you’re still that inexperienced kid who barely knew up from down. All those shining principles and convictions are still inside of you. And that part of you loves the idea of being a hero. And who could be a bigger hero than the savior of humanity?”
“Are you out of your mind?” demanded Sen. “The spirit beasts were coming for us all long before I knew anything about it. This war was coming since before I was born. I didn’t start this war. I’m not doing this to be a hero. I’m not doing this to be the savior of humanity. I’m doing this so there will still be so human beings alive in this world!”
“Have you actually convinced yourself of that? You’re right, the spirit beasts were always coming. I can’t deny that. But your part in all of this? Have you told yourself that you’re not doing this for your own ends? That you’re not doing this to be a hero? You didn’t need to seize power, despite anything you might have told yourself. Soone else would have taken that role. Soone far better equipped than you. Soone with actual experience as a leader and a general. Did you convince yourself that you were the best choice for the role? Are you that deluded? Or are you that blind to your own nature?”
Sen didn’t have an imdiate response to that. Changpu’s words had struck at so of his own deepest fears about his role in this war.
“By the heavens, you actually did!” said Changpu, before letting out a bitter laugh. “You talk about my pride and my arrogance. Well, what about your pride and your arrogance? What about your vanity? That’s the thing about heroes. They’re all vain. They all need people to see them as heroes. They need people to love them. So, tell , Emperor Lu, how many people have died in this war to serve your vanity? How many have died in the na of your need to be loved? How many people have needlessly died because you wanted to be a hero, and you had demigods to back you up?”
For a long mont, Sen said nothing. Changpu wasn’t right, but he also wasn’t wrong. Sen hadn’t been the best choice. He’d made far too many mistakes to ever believe he was a good leader or general. People had needlessly died because of his inexperience and, in so cases, purely because of his anger. Many only accepted him as the leader because he had Master Feng and Uncle Kho saying that was how it was going to be. He wasn’t building an empire for humanity. He was doing it for a far more selfish reason. But it wasn’t to be a hero. Sen didn’t care about that. He knew he wasn’t one, whatever the historical scrolls might say about him one day. There was far too much blood on his hands and far too much bad karma on his soul for that.
Righteous Wu Gang was a hero. But the world didn’t need a hero right now. Villages needed heroes. Cities needed heroes. But the world? If a hero could have done the job, one would have appeared long before Sen found himself pushed into his current position. No, the world needed a tyrant. And Sen needed an empire to ensure Ai’s safety. He needed a mortal army and a phalanx of cultivators bound to serve the house of Lu. Not so that he could use them, but so he could hand them to her.
He intended to make sure that she would be safe her entire life. If accomplishing that ant needless blood was spilled, he would learn to live with that, because the price would fall on him. He would always be a blood-soaked tyrant, but Ai would be an empress. One with clean hands. One that the people could love without having to look past all the ways that Sen himself was tainted. He wondered if all parents saw the world this way. Were they all willing to dirty themselves, do things they hated, just for the chance that their children would live better, safer lives? His own orphan childhood seed to suggest they weren’t, but most children weren’t orphans. He supposed it was sothing he’d need to ask others about.
Still, having found that place of acceptance in himself again, his calm returned. With it ca a clear realization. Changpu was stalling. Sen had no doubt that the man was saying things he’d been thinking about saying for years, but this wasn’t how cultivators fought. They exchanged a few insults and maybe threw around a few threats, but then the actual fighting started. Giving Changpu a look, Sen spoke.
“So, how many are we waiting for?”
Changpu’s expression shifted to surprise before he gave Sen another of those eerie, bestial smiles and said, “Figured it out, did you? Fair enough. Just one.”
Sen only got a split-second of warning as sothing right behind him erupted into being in his spiritual sense. That split second was still more than enough for his nascent soul reflexes to let him activate his qinggong technique and dodge out of the way. As he did that, he thought, That presence feels familiar.
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