Who would study psychology unless they had some issues?! Chapter 561: 543: Childhood Trauma2

Chapter 561: Chapter 543: Childhood Trauma_2

“That ti, my family was hosting a dinner, so we borrowed a big red round table from my uncle’s house and invited about ten or so close relatives over to eat.”

The visitor pressed his lips slightly: “It was supposed to be a harmonious and happy evening.”

At this point, the visitor let out a long sigh, then pressed his lips together more firmly, while pulling his cheeks, forcing a very stiff smile.

It seed like his body instinctively wanted to use physical expressions to dilute his inner emotions.

“But that day, I must have been naughty. Maybe I made so unreasonable demands or simply got scolded for playing around… I can’t rember the exact reason.”

The visitor’s gaze beca distant, as if trying hard to see sothing not present: “Anyway, I got reprimanded by my family, then I started crying, and I cried continuously, couldn’t stop crying.”

“My father hates it when I cry, it irritates him. So normally when I cry, he would scold , threaten to hit if I didn’t stop. I’m very afraid of pain, so usually at that point, I would cover my mouth, and bit by bit I would really stop crying.”

“But that day, well, that day, I cried too much. No matter how my father scolded , I couldn’t stop crying, and there were so many relatives at ho, he couldn’t hit , pinched a couple of tis, slapped a couple of tis, and I cried even harder.”

“Which annoyed him even more.”

The visitor’s gaze was fixed ahead, not eting Nan Zhubin’s eyes, seemingly seeing sothing: “I just rember everyone surrounding the round table, relatives making jokes at , probably trying to cheer up. But I just kept crying, so my father’s face looked worse and worse.”

“At first, he scolded again, then suddenly said to , ‘Why are you crying, today is a good day, who are you crying for?'”

The visitor narrated soone else’s words, but his tone was very calm, as if reciting a story, telling soone else’s experience.

“I kept crying.”

“Then my father said, ‘Crying so wretchedly, is there a death at ho? Stop crying!'”

“I still cried, even harder.”

At this point, the visitor paused, gritting his teeth.

“Then, my father seed to finally snap, saying to , ‘Fine, since you’re crying like at a funeral, let’s have soone actually die in the family today.'”

“He ran to the kitchen, pulled out a kitchen knife, and rushed towards .”

The visitor closed his eyes, frowning deeply, pulling at his cheeks again.

Then he opened his eyes like waking up suddenly: “There were so many people at my house that day, relatives all rushed to stop him, hmm.”

He suddenly snapped out of his emotion and even made a joke to Nan Zhubin: “He was of course stopped, otherwise I wouldn’t be sitting here today.”

Nan Zhubin didn’t laugh, instead, he frowned, lowering his eyes, and nodded gently.

“He was stopped but kept struggling, trying to break free from those relatives, waving the kitchen knife at , as if he wouldn’t rest until he achieved his goal…”

The visitor continued: “Actually, thinking about it now, my father probably didn’t really intend to do anything to back then. After all, there were so many relatives at ho, he surely knew they would stop him. More likely, I made him feel embarrassed, and he wanted to scare into stopping my crying.”

“But… hmm.” The visitor cleared his throat, adjusted his sitting posture, “I just can’t forget this incident, can’t forget this scene, and… that kitchen knife.”

…

A silence fell over the consultation room.

No sound followed.

Apparently, the visitor had finished a phase of his narrative.

Nan Zhubin didn’t speak rashly.

He waited for two breaths to make sure the visitor had nothing more to say.

“This is the first story.” The visitor indeed continued shortly after, “There is a second story.”

“The second story should be when I was a bit older, but not by much, probably around the third grade of elentary school.”

“That day, I just rember my mother gave one yuan.”

The visitor explained: “When I was little, my family wasn’t well-off, so I had no pocket money. But that day, I don’t know what ca over her, my mother suddenly gave one yuan, the specifics… I’ve forgotten.”

“Anyway, later my mother went out, my father ca in, and he suddenly found this one yuan on . Then he snatched it from , with that kind of…” the visitor gestured, “with that kind of teasing a child gesture, and asked where I got that one yuan, where I picked it up from.”

“But I didn’t cooperate with him, I must have had an angry face, I just wasn’t speaking, trying to snatch that one yuan back.”

“At first, my father was smiling, but after I silently tried to snatch for a while, he suddenly got angry.”

“My house had a river at the back. At that ti, my father suddenly grabbed my leg with one hand, lifted up like this…” the visitor gestured again, “hanging upside down over that river.”

“He asked where that one yuan ca from, if I stole it. He told to speak quickly, otherwise, he would throw into the river.”

The visitor squeezed out a smile again: “But back then, I was too scared to speak. I was hanging upside down over the river, looking at that dirty river water, everyone in my eyes was upside down.”

“I started crying again, constantly, without answering his question.”

“Kids love to cry, at least I was like that. I cried so loudly, it attracted people from both sides of the river, and eventually, it also brought my mother over.”

The mother-given one yuan was misunderstood by the father as stolen. Now the mother was there, theoretically, the misunderstanding should be resolved.

But the story’s progression seems not that straightforward and smooth.

“My mother explained to my father, but my father still didn’t put down. He was still very angry, questioning why I didn’t explain clearly if it wasn’t stolen.”

“I couldn’t speak, just cried. My mother first tried to persuade my father, but when she found it useless, she got angry too, and said to , ‘Zhihao, don’t be afraid, anyway, you can swim, falling into the river is no problem.'”

…

The visitor suddenly laughed again, this ti it wasn’t that forced smile, it seed like a genuine “pfft” kind of laugh.

The visitor covered his forehead: “But back then, I had just learned a little bit of swimming, could only splash around with a ladle or plastic bucket in the water. In fact, even now, I haven’t learned to swim, and have even forgotten how to splash.”

The second mory concluded here.

The visitor said: “Didn’t I ntion I had undergone psychological consultation before? These two incidents, I also talked with the consultation teacher then.”

The visitor gently shook his head: “He told that such complaints against parents are simply due to my age. When I grow older, and beco a parent myself, I’ll let go of it. As for now, ti is the only thing that can dilute it.”

“If I really want to feel better, to achieve emotional reconciliation, he suggested I talk to my parents, to tell them my thoughts.”

Nan Zhubin waited, seeing the visitor suddenly shut his mouth tight and did not continue speaking.

So he attempted to guide: “Did you go and talk to your mom and dad?”

The visitor didn’t respond imdiately.

After waiting for two breaths, he suddenly let out a “pfft” laugh, then again forced a smile by pulling at his cheeks.

Then another “pfft” laugh, as if recalling sothing very amusing.

His eyes fixedly stared at the coffee table in front, slowly, continuously nodding.

“I talked to them.”

“And then… they told it never happened, they asked if I rembered it wrong.”