Still, if we were going to handle “feelings,” Joo Seowon’s side would be a lot trickier. Different goals, different context from the start....
I waited for an answer, but he didn’t look inclined to give one.
“If you don’t answer, I’ll take it as a yes.”
“...I.”
“Mm.”
But that one word was the end of it again. I watched him clamp up and tugged one corner of my mouth.
“You curious why I don’t drink?”
“......”
“I can tell you.”
It wasn’t anything important, and the fact we’d gotten all the way here from that was... frankly ridiculous.
I studied his face and spoke slowly.
“Well... there are a few reasons, but the biggest is that people who live in a bottle don’t end well.”
“...Don’t end well?”
“Yeah.”
Only then did he manage to ask back, still looking like he couldn’t focus.
“He’s spaced out.”
I clicked my tongue inwardly.
“I’m not saying alcohol is inherently the problem, but people who live in it tend to die in ugly ways.”
“...Whose story is this?”
“My mother’s.”
“...Your mother?”
The wavering gaze finally fixed on . I nodded.
“On my mother’s side, there was alcoholism.”
“...Is that how she died?”
“Not exactly because of that... She disappeared at so point and was found as a corpse.”
“What?”
His reaction, quiet until now, spiked. I recalled the ti and added, calm as ever,
“I don’t know exactly what happened. I never bothered to dig.”
“When I... looked into you, nothing like that ca up.”
“Yeah, figures.”
That was my original family, not this world’s neatly doctored “Seo Jehyun.” Repeating the explanation was boring enough, but for so reason the way this was unfolding held my interest.
After a long silence, he asked carefully,
“So that’s why you don’t drink?”
“Partly. Also—what if I’ve got the family tendency? That scares .”
“...Family tendency?”
“Mm.”
His expression went odd at that. Wasn’t this what he wanted to hear? For sothing he’d been so eager to know, his reaction was surprisingly mild.
Well, even if he took that and ran with it, that wasn’t the only reason. A foggy mind, no self-control, drowning in an addictive substance—that life was never my taste. Even without a bad precedent, nothing would’ve changed for .
But I didn’t bother adding that. Why...? Mostly because I was curious how he’d react.
After a beat, he blurted out sothing random.
“...Sorry.”
What the hell was that now?
He tossed out that weird, contextless apology, darted his eyes like he was gauging , then added,
“I didn’t know.”
“Of course you didn’t. I never said.”
“...If it was that, I shouldn’t have asked.”
“What a... novel take.”
I honestly couldn’t understand what part of this called for an apology; I frowned a little. He clawed his fingers through his hair and frowned too.
“Doesn’t... this bother you?”
“What does?”
“Talking about this. Your... ho life.”
“I don’t go around bringing it up. But you asked.”
“...Sure, but I an...”
He worked his lips, clearly tangled up.
“...Stuff like this is hard to talk about. You might not get it, but to other people it’s like I touched sothing no one should touch. And it’s not sothing easy to pity, either. ...What I thought the reason would be wasn’t this.”
“You’re talking nonsense.”
“You—! Hey, a person is trying to—”
Must be nice, having spare change for pity.
His reaction wasn’t as intense as I expected; my interest dipped again. I left him to ramble and flipped back the neatly made duvet.
“You’re not listening to aga—”
“Ah.”
Co to think of it, didn’t this whole thing start because of Do Yehyun? I snapped back to the original topic.
“So, was that all you had to say about Do Yehyun?”
“......”
“Guess not.”
Honestly, getting mad because I told him sothing I didn’t tell you—about Doh Yehyun of all people—was absurd. There were a truckload of “secrets” I’d only ever shared with Joo Seowon.
He stared at the floor, thinking.
“So he liked you even ~Nоvеl𝕚ght~ knowing that?”
“You’ve got cause and effect mixed up.”
“...aning?”
“He just likes that I shared a secret with him.”
“......”
The reason was simple. He likes .
Seowon seed to read the ellipsis easily enough; he didn’t react. I glanced at the clock. Nearly four in the morning. Still dark out, but at this rate, we were definitely not getting proper sleep.
I prodded him.
“Anything else you’re curious about? I’ll tell you.”
“......”
Since we were on it anyway, better to clear him out. Just because he was quiet didn’t an he had no questions.
“Hm...”
But he still didn’t answer.
I’d laid the board this wide and he kept his mouth shut. That’s on him. So now can I ask?
I looked at him and tilted my mouth into a slant.
Normally I’d let it slide... but this, I couldn’t.
“Seowon.”
“......”
“Do you like ?”
If I thought about it, I already... knew. I just hadn’t said it.
I let my eyes flick to his heated ears and went on.
“Were you hoping I wouldn’t notice? When you made it that obvious.”
“......”
“I’m not stupid.”
“I...”
I couldn’t quite make sense of it. With Do Yehyun, you do things for him and that can spark affection. But with Seowon, it started with grabbing his sister as leverage and threatening him.
And then he calls soft on Doh Yehyun? Give a break.
Watching his wavering eyes, I stepped in close and caught his jaw.
“...!”
“You only look away at tis like this. Why?”
“Let—go.”
“If you keep turning away, I can’t see your face.”
“I don’t—”
“You’ve never actually hated it, have you?”
Always saying you hate it when you’ve never properly tried to.
The room was dim, but not enough to hide the flush in his cheeks and ears. It wasn’t just embarrassnt over the situation; it felt like the humiliation of having sothing buried dragged into the light. Odd.
Even with the evidence in front of , it wasn’t easy to grasp.
“...Strange. Why do you like ?”
“......”
“Seowon, you’re not in any position to call soone soft. You’re the softest one here.”
“......”
His stubbornly shut mouth made chuckle. I broke my words up and watched his expression. This one, he might actually dislike.
“You pity easily, and you hand your heart out easily...”
“......”
So soft and you still made it this far. Was that because Kwon Taehan’s a soft piece of work too? If I’d known he’d be this easy, I might never have needed the covenant in the first place.
“This is a problem.”
I let go of his jaw.
It wasn’t a topic I could do anything about right now. I hadn’t dredged it up to “resolve” it either.
“What are you doing? Sleep. Go wash up.”
I tipped my mouth again and pointed to the bathroom. He sat frozen on the bed for a long mont despite what I said. I couldn’t read his face, but it looked like he was swallowing down anger.
Then, all at once, he shot to his feet—and ca straight to .
“You...”
“......”
“Are you trying... to make hate you on purpose?”
He broke his sentence into pieces and let out a hollow laugh.
“You let show a little of what’s inside, and if I like that, you... turn it into a ss again.”
“?”
“I wondered if you’re doing this because you don’t know anything...”
“......”
He trailed off, then clenched his fist with a face that scread tired disbelief. Was he planning to take a swing?
But he just let his fist fall, weak, and muttered,
“If you know I like you... you can’t say things like that.”
“......”
“...When you know. Fuck.”
“......”
“You piece of shit...”
I hadn’t expected that one. But I couldn’t answer him in the end.
Because right after he said it, he grabbed by the collar like he was about to start a fight—then lowered his head and pressed his lips to mine.
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