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Now reading: Chapter 118: I used to be Derek Hamilton from Knot me on ice, Captain(BL), a Yaoi novel by Lorelei2.

Kayden

"And he told Linda is your mother."

The words resounded in my head and before I knew it, I was dragging my chair back. The screech of wood against the deck was so loud it got Rhys’s attention imdiately.

I stood up too fast, my head spinning so hard that I nearly fell, but Rhys appeared behind in a second, his hands catching my arms to hold steady.

"Kayden, calm down. Please," he urged as he pulled into his arms. "This... this is exactly why I didn’t want to tell you. I didn’t know how you’d take it."

I stood there for a mont, my back pressed against his chest, feeling the frantic rhythm of his heart matching my own. I didn’t pull away. I didn’t yell. Instead, I let out a long, heavy sigh—the kind that felt like it was emptying my entire lungs.

He knows my mother is Linda and my father is in prison.

What else does he know?

I should have told him that night when he told about his family, but I was too ashad to let out my past because every mont of it was filled with pain.

"Rhys," I muttered as I slowly turned around to face him. I lifted my head and saw the fear in his eyes—the fear that I was going to walk away or bla him for his grandfather’s cruelty.

"I should have told you," I said softly, my voice shaking. "I knew one day the truth would co out. It had to." I rubbed my forehead, trying to soothe the dull ache forming there, and looked up toward the dark sky. The stars were still there, indifferent to the ss my life had beco. "I had wanted to tell you all along, Rhys, but I was too afraid. I... I just didn’t know how to start the conversation without losing you. I didn’t know what you would think of ."

Rhys reached out, his hands trembling slightly as they settled on my waist. "Kayden, I could never think badly of you. None of that changes who you are to ." He looked at with an intensity that made my heart ache. "If you don’t want to talk about it tonight, you don’t have to. We can just stop right here."

I shook my head, shifting to look him directly in the eyes. "No," I said firmly. "I’m going to tell you." I took a deep breath, the scent of the orchids filling my senses one more ti. "We’re boyfriends now. We’re in this for real. Lying or keeping secrets wouldn’t get us anywhere but apart, and I’m not losing you because I was too cowardly to speak."

I turned away from the table and walked toward the edge of the yacht, the railing cool beneath my palms. I closed my eyes as the wind blew my hair, and when I opened them, Rhys was standing by my side.

"My father is in prison for first-degree murder," I started, the words falling like stones into the dark water below. "He’s in for life. His na is Kelvin Hamilton." I paused, the next part feeling like sothing I never wished to ever hear again. "And my real na is Derek Hamilton. It’s a na I haven’t heard, or used, in years."

I felt Rhys place his hand on mine on the railing, but I didn’t raise my head.

"Kelvin was a piece of shit," I spat, my voice cracking with anger. "He found pleasure in abusing for years. He hated ... he blad for making my mother leave. He started on when I was just a kid. A young, powerless oga."

I let out a shaky, jagged sigh. Thinking about those days always felt like being back in that house, trapped in the silence while dealing with the pain.

"Leo’s story was just like mine," I added, my grip tightening on the tal railing until my knuckles turned white. "But I won’t go into the details of his life. That isn’t my story to tell." I looked out at the horizon, the city lights blurring from afar. "We beca friends at a playground one day. Two hungry kids sharing whatever scraps of food we could find. We were the sa. The only difference was that Leo’s mother eventually ca back. She fought for Leo’s rights, and Leo was finally free from his father."

I let out a bitter, hollow laugh that died in the wind.

"That wasn’t the case for . No one ca back. No one fought. I spent my childhood in pain, crying every night and hoping the world would change." I finally turned to face Rhys, my eyes brimming with tears that I could no longer hold back.

"I started cosplaying as an alpha just to feel like I belonged, but still, I couldn’t change my identity. I was an oga after all. Then I found hockey, and it led back to Leo again. We t after a year of being apart, and I think Leo’s father found out about us staying in touch."

The mories started to flood back, making my voice tremble as the trauma of that night resurfaced.

"Leo’s father... he was a monster. He found us, and he attacked . He was trying to kill , Rhys. He had his hands on , and I thought that was it." I wiped a stray tear and sniffled. "But my father fought back. He didn’t do it to be a hero; he did it because he was losing his punching bag. He ended up killing Leo’s father right in front of ."

I gripped the railing so hard my palms stung, and not even Rhys’s hand could calm the anger I was feeling.

"When Leo found out what was happening, he didn’t run away. He took away from that house, but everything was already falling apart. My father was arrested for murder because he had killed Leo’s dad, but the truth was, he had almost killed , too, if Leo hadn’t called the cops as quickly as he did."

I looked at Rhys, my vision blurred by the tears in my eyes and the wind. "He ended up being taken away in handcuffs, and that night, I beca a different person. I couldn’t be that broken boy anymore. From Derek Hamilton, I beca Kayden Vale. I buried Derek in that house and never looked back."

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