Who would study psychology unless they had some issues?! Chapter 795 668: [Self Parts Dialogue]2

Li Lingling nodded, continuously nodding.

"That's right, that's right... it all makes sense. Even though I don't try to think about it, don't try to recall, it still affects ... even if I feel like I've rembered now, it can't change anything."

"It will change, I'll help you." Nan Zhubin took a mont to offer so [Support].

Then he continued to explain, slowing his speech to ensure every sentence could be absorbed by Li Lingling: "Now we know that your core distress is the extre fear of 'being abandoned', and this fear stems from what we saw in this [hypnosis] — your father took your brother to escape the flood but left you behind. As a child, you couldn't comprehend the complex reasons behind your father's choice and could only instinctively believe 'I'm not good enough, so Dad didn't choose .'"

"This belief of 'I'm worthless' took root in your subconscious."

"Later, your extre attitudes towards relationships were actually ways to avoid the pain of 'being abandoned again.' When you feel soone understands you and treats you well, you approach them unconditionally because you crave stable acceptance; but once you discover they're not perfect, you imdiately flee because you're afraid of them 'abandoning you again.'"

Nan Zhubin took a deep breath: "This isn't your fault, it's just the trauma from childhood that shaped this protective chanism."

...

Nan Zhubin's explanation here was ant to lay the groundwork for the subsequent [Cognitive Reconstruction].

One core issue for a visitor with [Borderline Personality Disorder] is forcibly tying others' behaviors to self-worth, and Nan Zhubin needed to help Li Lingling clarify the non-correlation between "father's choice" and "her worth," breaking this erroneous cognitive linkage.

This is the basis for subsequent interventions.

Li Lingling hesitated for a long ti before nodding bit by bit, with so difficulty.

"Yes, you're right…"

Li Lingling's lips trembled slightly, subconsciously clutching the empty water cup: "Then… my previous, what you said about [survivor guilt], is it because of this too?"

Very good, since the visitor brought it up, Nan Zhubin naturally continued to explore.

"Yes." Nan Zhubin nodded, his tone growing more solemn, "What you call [survivor guilt] is actually an interweaving of two layers of emotion—"

Nan Zhubin first extended his left hand, placing it flat in front of his chest.

"One layer is 'my family perished, and only I survived, it shouldn't be this way';"

Then he extended his right hand, placing it over the left.

"The other, more hidden layer is 'the reason I survived was because I was abandoned by my father'—in your subconscious, you might feel your survival was built upon 'being abandoned' and 'your family's demise', so you don't dare to be happy and can only alleviate this guilt through self-punishnt."

Nan Zhubin began unpacking the complexity of [survivor guilt] to avoid Li Lingling oversimplifying her emotions.

The information presented during today's [hypnosis] was indeed vast.

A visitor with [Borderline Personality Disorder] can easily fall into "black-and-white" emotional judgnts, believing that "feeling guilty must an self-punishnt." Unpacking emotions can help Li Lingling understand that emotions are inherently complex and do not require extre behaviors to respond.

Li Lingling hesitated for a mont, then nodded.

It was as if her brain had been overwheld with massive information, leaving her unable to think, and thus being led by Nan Zhubin.

This is a good thing for the beginning of [Cognitive Reconstruction].

But in a while, it might not be, so Nan Zhubin needed to reawaken Li Lingling's thinking ability.

Before Nan Zhubin could continue, Li Lingling posed a question.

"Then my mom... did she really want to take with her?" Li Lingling's voice carried a hint of choking.

This is the tenderest and most tangled area in her heart.

Clearly determined not to pursue "yes or no" answers before the hypnosis, now Li Lingling found herself entangled again.

Repeatedly, today's [hypnosis]'s information overwheld Li Lingling beyond her original expectations, making her psychological preparations inadequate to respond.

The scenarios she constructed in her mind did not cover such situations, leading to a degree of [regression] at this mont.

Fortunately, Nan Zhubin had a plan.

"Yes, it is true." Nan Zhubin's tone was extrely certain, promptly providing so [Support].

"What you saw in [hypnosis], your mom's struggle, her outstretched hand, and all her efforts towards you are the most genuine proof."

"She didn't want to leave you behind, but was weighed down by too many other conditions, making her unable to resist."

"At the ti, the reason you felt you were also abandoned by your mom was because, as a child, you couldn't understand an adult's helplessness and could only judge love or lack thereof from whether she would take you."

Nan Zhubin said, "And this childhood cognition solidified as you grew, further influencing your adult self."

...

Upon hearing this, Li Lingling's tears finally rolled down uncontrollably.

But then she smiled: "Sorry, Teacher Nan... my feelings are very complicated now... I don't even know how I feel now..."

"I feel very sad... but also a bit happy..."

Nan Zhubin did not speak imdiately.

He pressed the pause button and quietly handed Li Lingling a tissue, giving her ample ti to release her emotions.

At this mont, the emotional catharsis was necessary.

Once Li Lingling's emotions had sowhat cald, Nan Zhubin continued: "Lingling, now you have seen the root of the problem, and affird your mom's love."

Nan Zhubin's voice began to gain strength, no longer soft: "What we must do next is not to forget this experience, but to accept it, integrate it, and let it no longer be the shackle that hurts you, but a strength for your growth."

The strength in the voice was infectious.

Indeed, Nan Zhubin's voice was inherently particularly infectious for various reasons.

Li Lingling quickly took a deep breath along with Nan Zhubin's guidance, lifted her head, and wiped away her tears.

She nodded and said, "Teacher Nan, what should I do next?"

Nan Zhubin also nodded: "First, we need to anchor the truths we have just confird firmly in our hearts, as these are the foundation of your self-worth."

Nan Zhubin extended his left hand, forming a fist: "Let's affirm three things together, follow along with , alright?"

Li Lingling nodded.

"First, mom's concern is real, she always loves ." Nan Zhubin extended a finger.

"First, mom's concern is real, she always loves ." Li Lingling repeated verbatim.

Nan Zhubin nodded.

Then he extended a second finger: "Second, dad's choice is his decision, not because I'm not good enough, I have no fault."

"Second. Dad's choice... is his decision. I... did nothing, wrong..."

Li Lingling's repetition was halting, but she managed to say it.

Very good, Nan Zhubin nodded internally.

So Nan Zhubin extended a third finger: "Third, the tragedy of dad, mom, and brother's demise was caused by the flood, and my survival is not a sin."

This is an application of [Cognitive Anchoring] technique.

Repeating core truths aloud can solidify new cognition in the subconscious, forming stable cognitive anchors, preventing subsequent emotional shifts from causing falling back into old negative cognition.

This technique is very simple to perform, yet it effectively reinforces the outcos of cognitive reconstruction, laying a foundation for the integration of emotions and identity affirmation that follows.

"Third... whew..." Li Lingling took a deep breath, "The tragedy of dad, mom, and brother's demise, caused by the flood, my survival is not... a sin."

"Very good. Next, we will do a small exercise." Nan Zhubin provided affirmation, "This exercise is called [Self-Dialogue]."